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Dillywillyfoo

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Dillywillyfoo

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  • Number of visits : 1117
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Visits<b>blueflygon</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 3:56am<b>xALEXx</b> - the 05/14/2013 at 12:38am<b>The_Honey_Badger</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 11:53pm<b>SkoomaKi</b> - the 03/23/2013 at 2:52pm<b>RebornUnicorn</b> - the 03/05/2013 at 12:48am<b>Puptaku</b> - the 02/19/2013 at 1:49pm

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Today, I went to a local Indian takeaway, since I'm from India originally, and none of my friends speak Hindi. I went up to the counter and placed my order in Hindi with the seemingly Indian owner. He gave me a weird look and said, "Huh? Speak English, ya rimjob." FML

#20669248
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41694) - you deserved it (11852)

On 05/17/2013 at 4:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad used to stalk when he was in high school. FML

#20668592
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45831) - you deserved it (2916)

On 05/17/2013 at 5:25am - misc - by Jololol - United States

Today, my family and friends decided to throw a surprise party for my 16th birthday. I was so surprised that the shortness of breath triggered a serious asthma attack. FML

#20668366
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40865) - you deserved it (3437)

On 05/17/2013 at 12:35am - misc - by presente13 (woman) - United States

Today, I agreed to go on a date with the creepy guy from my Economics class because I'm so broke that I could really use the free meal. FML

#20628307
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45052) - you deserved it (13666)

On 04/28/2013 at 6:24pm - love - by shameless - United States (Georgia)

Today, I woke up to my brother chopping all my bangs off. When I yelled at him, he could only shout back, "You can see clearly now, the bangs are gone!" FML

#20599244
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49814) - you deserved it (8174)

On 04/17/2013 at 12:13pm - kids - by my dumb bro - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I told my dad I'm pregnant. His response? "It's only a phase, you'll get over it." FML

#20592767
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53039) - you deserved it (10208)

On 04/15/2013 at 2:04am - intimacy - by twinArmageddon2 - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend said he felt like eating icing. So I baked him cupcakes, put icing on them and decorated them. When I handed them to him, he picked off the decoration, licked the icing and handed the cupcake back to me, saying, "I told you that's all I wanted." FML

#20592650
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24207) - you deserved it (48466)

On 04/15/2013 at 1:11am - misc - by Cupcakes (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was working the night shift at the hotel. One of my tasks is to clean out the pool robot. While trying to pull it up, I got pulled in. I had to hide naked in the laundry room for an hour while I put my uniform through the dryer. FML

#20580594
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31978) - you deserved it (3797)

On 04/08/2013 at 12:56pm - work - by soakedga - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out that the money that my wife claims went into repairing her car engine actually is going towards helping her pay for a divorce. FML

#20564887
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35362) - you deserved it (3009)

On 03/29/2013 at 1:37am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I nervously started a new job, and my co-workers were telling me silly rules about our boss. Later, I accidentally bumped into him, and blurted "Rule #7, don't touch George." He definitely heard. FML

#20564827
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15739) - you deserved it (31339)

On 03/29/2013 at 12:38am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I realized that I'm so lonely I can no longer whack off without bursting into tears and crying like a little bitch. FML

#20564779
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42204) - you deserved it (19345)

On 03/29/2013 at 12:11am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML

#20562846
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79737) - you deserved it (8238)

On 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I woke up next to my girlfriend. I was woken up by my mother breaking into my house to tell me I need to get ready for work. Then she got mad that I had a girl over. I'm 20. FML

#20561180
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37839) - you deserved it (4626)

On 03/26/2013 at 4:20pm - misc - by holycommander - United States

Today, my daughter got selected to pick music for a funeral. She only listens to Nikki Minaj. FML

#20560709
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35808) - you deserved it (5159)

On 03/26/2013 at 7:40am - kids - by bear - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I bought an expensive razor that's supposed to be great. My roommate asked if she could borrow it, and as her legs just looked like they needed touching up, I said sure. After a strangely long amount of time, she came back, thanked me and left. Her legs were still hairy. FML

#20557395
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36216) - you deserved it (11724)

On 03/24/2013 at 1:30am - misc - by bleach (woman) - United Kingdom



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