I created the Fmylife website with Maxime & Guillaume, ViedeMerde's founding fathers. I also work as a sound producer and art director in my own companies. I can also make coffee and fill the fridge with beer, but I'm the team's member who has the most trouble holding his liquor.
Today, I had my first day off in weeks. I was excited about getting to sleep in, until my boss called me at 6:30 in the morning to remind me I didn't have to come into work. Thanks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23976) - you totally deserved it (1542)
On 09/26/2009 at 10:30am - work - by NoSleep (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I went on my first date in nearly a year. A few minutes into the meal, he called me "scrumptious" and proceeded to make animal noises for the rest of it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22615) - you totally deserved it (1635)
On 09/26/2009 at 10:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, while at a club, I walked up to a cutie who had been eyeing me all night. I asked him "Is that a phone in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?". He simply replied "It's a phone" before walking away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4259) - you totally deserved it (26876)
On 09/26/2009 at 10:15am - misc - by desperate (woman) - Denmark (Staden Kobenhavn)
Today, I decided I need help, so I confessed to my mother that I'm bulimic. After she looked it up online she started screaming at me for "Wasting food that I'm not paying for." FML
I agree, your life sucks (33107) - you totally deserved it (5904)
On 08/19/2009 at 7:43pm - health - by Rainbow92 (woman) - Bulgaria (Grad Sofiya)
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Attempting to make things a little more exciting, I said in my sexiest voice "oh yeah, harder." My boyfriend who apparently doesn't like talking dirty, pulled out and angrily said "I was trying, what more do you want?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (53240) - you totally deserved it (11372)
On 05/26/2009 at 12:53pm - intimacy - by alexis89 (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my boyfriend of 2 years took me to get a tattoo done with his name on. He paid for it. After it was done he told me it was over between us and he thought it'd be a nice reminder of him for me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (80811) - you totally deserved it (38711)
On 05/25/2009 at 2:05pm - love - by Angelofkarma (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)
Today, I had a very intense sexual dream that made me come and left me panting when I woke up. It was the best orgasm I'd ever had. The trouble was, it wasn't about a hot girl, or anything sexy. It was about bacon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (87911) - you totally deserved it (18897)
On 05/17/2009 at 8:33am - intimacy - by wtfdreams (man) - United States (California)
Today, me and my boyfriend were telling eachother secrets and I told him i've shaved my upper lip. He said "I know, it's prickly when we make out." FML
I agree, your life sucks (36907) - you totally deserved it (17273)
On 04/06/2009 at 5:50pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was going to have sex with my hispanic boyfriend. I wanted to turn him on, so I asked my friend how to say "fuck me" in Spanish. She claimed it was "pollo frito". I then proceeded to have sex, constantly screaming pollo frito for an hour. I later realized I was screaming "fried chicken." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27776) - you totally deserved it (87360)
On 04/06/2009 at 3:51pm - intimacy - by FML.. (woman) - China (Hebei)
Today, I was on a blind date with a girl my friend set me up with. We went to a fancy restaurant and she ordered the shrimp. I told her, "I'm allergic to shrimp, so you shouldn't order it in case I want to kiss you later." She looked at the waiter and said, "I'll have the shrimp." FML
I agree, your life sucks (45327) - you totally deserved it (19809)
On 03/26/2009 at 1:11pm - love - by johnfrank (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I went to my new doctor to establish the paperwork. During the questionnaire, she asked if I was sexually active. I said yes. She then asked, "what do you do?". I told her I normally did vaginal, but would sometimes do anal. She blushed and started to laugh. She was asking where I worked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45394) - you totally deserved it (29703)
On 03/16/2009 at 12:39am - intimacy - by Noname (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my parents were taking a tour of my apartment when my bird started making noises. It was mimicking my moans from when I was having sex yesterday. It was screaming in my voice, very noticeably. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55425) - you totally deserved it (18806)
On 03/15/2009 at 6:45pm - intimacy - by Moanie (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was excited because I was going to get my college decisions back. I put all of the letters in order of my preference. Didn't get into my first choice. Denied from my second choice. Rejected from my third choice. Wait listed on my back-up. Accepted for a job at Target. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52386) - you totally deserved it (6716)
On 03/13/2009 at 5:09pm - misc - by sadsenior (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, my cat was in the bathroom with me. I was getting undressed to get into the shower. My cat looked at me after I undressed and then proceeded to throw up all over the rug. FML
I agree, your life sucks (63073) - you totally deserved it (6893)
On 03/12/2009 at 6:08pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I just finished having dinner with my boyfriend, so I leaned over to him and said seductively, "How about some dessert?" Obviously, he didn't catch my tone, because he then looked at me and said, "Babe, you really don't need it." FML
I agree, your life sucks (46931) - you totally deserved it (5381)
On 03/11/2009 at 5:12pm - misc - by marshmallowssss (woman) - United States (Maryland)
