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Destro109

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Destro109
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 126
  • Number of comments : 24
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About Destro109 : I find this place highly amusing.

Destro109's last visitors

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Destro109's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of Destro109's badges

Destro109's favorite FMLs

Today, my 12-year-old sister watched Frozen. She's spent the last two hours playing the song Let It Go on high volume over and over, and in different languages. I now have a skull-splitting headache, and my dad just sarcastically told me to "let it go". FML

#21113787
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12605) - you deserved it (1490)

On 04/15/2014 at 3:24pm - kids - by fuckyouharddad - United States (California)

Today, in the middle of sex, my girlfriend yelled, "STUFF ME LIKE A TURKEY!" I couldn't finish. FML

#21112870
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31499) - you deserved it (3542)

On 04/14/2014 at 4:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my overly-attached 14-year-old cat wanted attention while I was in a heated Skype argument with my girlfriend. Worked up from the fight, I raised my voice and said, "Not now, go away!" He ran to his little bed, had a heart attack and died. I was a complete dick to my cat in his last moments. FML

#21108570
328 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55609) - you deserved it (26315)

On 04/09/2014 at 2:40pm - animals - by Brody89 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my obsession with saying "your mom" reached a new level when my anatomy teacher asked what I did with my pencil. FML

#21108224
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17357) - you deserved it (40857)

On 04/09/2014 at 1:17am - misc - by Motha - United States (Utah)

Today, my in-laws moved in. FML

#21107985
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54850) - you deserved it (4844)

On 04/08/2014 at 9:42pm - misc - by Great (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to my boss's dinner party. My sister, who also works with me, sat across from me at the table. I felt her kick me so I kicked her back. Then I heard something start crying. It was the boss's baby crawling under the table. FML

#20823157
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51209) - you deserved it (16880)

On 08/06/2013 at 1:07am - work - by offuckingcourse - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after suffering with bad constipation and having to eat special bread to get me to go, I have practically just pooped out a week's worth of food in 15 minutes, and I'm still going. I've passed the ring of fire stage, now I just can't feel my asshole. FML

#19174199
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33497) - you deserved it (5187)

On 02/27/2012 at 10:55am - health - by awhmaaan - United Kingdom

Today, I cut my penis on a desk fan. FML

#18217902
375 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16997) - you deserved it (73795)

On 11/11/2011 at 10:53am - intimacy - by dumbassbuffet (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I shat a magnet. FML

#17843744
287 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10051) - you deserved it (27697)

On 09/26/2011 at 10:51pm - health - by mimi - United States (Illinois)

Today, my toilet decided it wouldn't take any more shit from me, and flooded the bathroom. FML

#16299538
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31237) - you deserved it (4718)

On 05/22/2011 at 4:31pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML

#5828114
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84204) - you deserved it (13911)

On 10/14/2009 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, for my birthday, I got a Big Mac. FML

#2019418
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55434) - you deserved it (6905)

On 05/17/2009 at 4:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I had to call my mom and tell her about the insurance claim that is going to be coming through in the next couple of weeks. I spent the night in the hospital. I'm allergic to lube. FML

#55146
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44633) - you deserved it (5972)

On 02/16/2009 at 6:36pm - intimacy - by manda (woman) - United States (Wyoming)

Today, to my delight I discover that there is security camera in the storage room at my work. The same room where, two days ago I masturbated. FML

#265
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10437) - you deserved it (62745)

On 11/10/2008 at 4:11am - work - by tadam - Sent from mobile version



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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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