Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Desfar

Search for a member

Desfar

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 21 August 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 432
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Desfar's FML badges

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of Desfar's badges

Desfar's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML

#20071482
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15604) - you deserved it (25904)

On 09/14/2012 at 10:50am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, after a visit with my mom, I started feeling sick. I meant to send her a text asking if she had gotten sick lately, but I accidentally sent a text asking if she had gotten dick lately. FML

#20054615
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27711) - you deserved it (4615)

On 09/02/2012 at 7:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was playing with my vibrator. I was getting close when all of a sudden it short-circuited and made a sound like a laughing clown, scaring me half to death. FML

Today, my boyfriend, who lives 100 miles away and whom I haven't seen in 2 months, told me he was visiting my city with some friends. I assumed this was an opening to an invitation, but no, he just asked me about the best places to get drunk. FML

#20013231
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20547) - you deserved it (2763)

On 08/10/2012 at 8:57am - misc - by blink_kid - United Kingdom (West Lothian)

Today, my 4-year-old son cut half of my hair when I was asleep because he thought I would look better that way. FML

#19990341
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21673) - you deserved it (2918)

On 07/29/2012 at 4:11am - kids - by ellieowenie - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my over-protective husband went into an extreme fit of jealousy at the sight of me breast-feeding our newborn baby boy. He's trying to make me bottle-feed our boy, because apparently it's "wrong" to let another guy touch my boobs. FML

#19900187
327 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40733) - you deserved it (4191)

On 07/06/2012 at 1:44pm - love - by wife of a shithead (woman) - Norway (Oslo)

Today, I had eight teeth removed in preparation for getting my braces fitted. My winter break will now consists of barely being able to sleep or eat, tasting blood, and looking like a goofy-ass chipmunk. FML

#19900081
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20947) - you deserved it (2029)

On 07/06/2012 at 1:11pm - misc - by Julie is in pain (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went to take my driver's test, and I did almost everything perfectly. The last thing was to back into a driveway. As I went to put my hand on the passenger seat to look over my shoulder, I got so nervous that I hit my instructor in the face. FML

#19782263
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24392) - you deserved it (3050)

On 06/13/2012 at 2:13pm - misc - by sopissed - United States (Maryland)

Today, I saw Thor and I wanted to see how realistic it was to be swinging a hammer around. Wrong idea. I ended up unconscious on the ground for ten whole minutes. FML

#19753882
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5368) - you deserved it (36325)

On 06/08/2012 at 4:09am - misc - by runner2731 - United States (Ohio)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: