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DesB

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DesB
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8906
  • Number of comments : 70
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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DesB's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in a restroom sitting on the toilet, when the guy right next to me noticed my AC/DC boxers around my ankles and started to sing "Back in Black." FML

#17296721
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23154) - you deserved it (9285)

On 07/29/2011 at 10:27am - misc - by sofargone420 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex, and it was my first time being on top. I got so into it that when I went to put my hands on the wall for support, the shelf above my bed snapped, with my favorite little cactus falling onto his face. FML

#17294808
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34212) - you deserved it (9134)

On 07/29/2011 at 3:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex, and it was my first time being on top. I got so into it that when I went to put my hands on the wall for support, the shelf above my bed snapped, with my favorite little cactus falling onto his face. FML

#17294808
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34212) - you deserved it (9134)

On 07/29/2011 at 3:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, after eating out with my boyfriend, we went for a drive, but ended up getting into an argument. I reached back to grab my bag and storm out of the car. He thought I was trying to take the restaurant's doggy bag and lunged at me. My boyfriend would rather save chicken than our relationship. FML

#17294621
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29538) - you deserved it (5733)

On 07/29/2011 at 2:56am - love - by Tallulah (woman) - United Kingdom (Croydon)

Today, I went to a jeweler's to buy a ring to propose to my girlfriend. When I was at the restaurant, in mid-proposal, with people watching, I realized I had left the ring in the store. FML

#17294240
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28251) - you deserved it (12127)

On 07/29/2011 at 2:19am - love - by failure - United States (California)

Today, my wife threw a piece of tofu cake at my head for suggesting that the money she'd spent on magic "healing" crystals and homeopathic "remedies" would've just as well been spent on a chocolate teapot. FML

#17293531
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21257) - you deserved it (6110)

On 07/29/2011 at 1:11am - misc - by notabeliever - United States (California)

Today, I found out that when you kick another man in the snowglobes and he smiles at you, there's something creepily wrong. FML

#17292941
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26792) - you deserved it (4848)

On 07/29/2011 at 12:20am - intimacy - by FML (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was browsing the web when I checked the search history. Turns out my son has been searching for "nude grills" and "hot grills." Not only is my 12-year-old son attempting to find porn on the internet, he also can't spell. FML

#17281952
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35433) - you deserved it (5398)

On 07/27/2011 at 10:02pm - intimacy - by Nickname (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I learned that my daughter's gerbils are not afraid of the vacuum cleaner. FML

#17279585
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25282) - you deserved it (9181)

On 07/27/2011 at 2:09pm - kids - by corasmom (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was helping clean my grandpa's garage when I found some of his old election posters from the '50s. They included slogans such as, "Dick: you know it feels right" and "Want growth? Choose Dick." I'm not sure whether to be disgusted or impressed. FML

#17279382
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24363) - you deserved it (3977)

On 07/27/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Nick (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my 8 year old son cut his own hair. He did a better job than I ever did. I'm a hairdresser. FML

#17279085
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13720) - you deserved it (26297)

On 07/27/2011 at 12:35pm - kids - by buiuuum - United States (Michigan)

Today, some ballbag broke into my house just to take my broom. FML

#17278350
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24614) - you deserved it (2508)

On 07/27/2011 at 9:50am - misc - by kelsjenks - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was walking my dog, and a whole bunch of teenagers were driving around my neighborhood throwing water balloons at people. They followed me for 3 blocks. FML

#17277458
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22903) - you deserved it (2190)

On 07/27/2011 at 4:09am - animals - by CarrieRedburn (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I learned it's best not to piss off your mom when she's cutting your hair. FML

#17275625
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10233) - you deserved it (35683)

On 07/27/2011 at 12:50am - misc - by :( - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went shopping with my grandma. She went to the bathroom and was gone for a long while. I jokingly asked, "What happened, you fall in?" She did. She had shit all over the back of her shirt. FML

#17260985
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30096) - you deserved it (5989)

On 07/25/2011 at 11:35pm - misc - by Ima_Moronski - United States (Oklahoma)



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