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DesB

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DesB
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8907
  • Number of comments : 70
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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DesB's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the airport. A creepy man smiled at me, so I politely smiled back. I then realized his shirt said "Smile if you take it in the ass." He then winked at me and walked off. FML

#17315983
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34541) - you deserved it (11900)

On 07/31/2011 at 1:11am - intimacy - by creepedout - United States

Today, I was at a local restaurant. The girl that I like walked by so I tried to give her a high five. My hand ended up on her boob instead. FML

#17315366
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23752) - you deserved it (15277)

On 07/31/2011 at 12:20am - misc - by James (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend's mother walked in on us having sex. He started crying and ran into the bathroom where my clothes were located, leaving me to deal with his mother. Naked. FML

#17313020
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38091) - you deserved it (7301)

On 07/30/2011 at 8:45pm - intimacy - by cutiekenz21 - United States (Oregon)

Today, my 17 pound cat fell from a counter. It wouldn't have been a big deal if he didn't try to use my leg as a tree to cling onto on the way down. FML

#17312573
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25355) - you deserved it (4238)

On 07/30/2011 at 7:58pm - animals - by Backinzi - United States (Iowa)

Today, I was having horrible morning sickness. I was violently throwing up, could hardly breathe, and was gasping for air between each round of puking. My husband, in the other room playing video games, snapped and shouted, "Why can't you just be quiet?!" FML

#17311021
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39019) - you deserved it (5843)

On 07/30/2011 at 5:06pm - health - by Ceej - United States (Illinois)

Today, it started pouring while I was in the middle of a pizza delivery. I had to stand out in the rain for ten minutes while an old redneck dude wearing nothing but camo boxers fumbled around for the exact change to pay the bill. I think seeing his junk was supposed to count as my tip. FML

#17310535
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28377) - you deserved it (2510)

On 07/30/2011 at 4:02pm - intimacy - by womboman - United States

Today, I had my back waxed to deal with the uncontrollable hair growth. Afterwards, I broke out in numerous pimples where the hair used to be. Basically, a lose-lose situation. FML

#17308613
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22833) - you deserved it (3050)

On 07/30/2011 at 12:01pm - misc - by Mitcha857 - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, while having sex, my boyfriend decided to sing the Star Wars theme song as he entered his penis into me. FML

#17304826
302 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34609) - you deserved it (9282)

On 07/30/2011 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Taylor - United States (Texas)

Today, in health class, I raised my hand and asked if you could get an STD from dogs. I have officially now ruined any extremely small chance I had of being popular. FML

#17304355
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8170) - you deserved it (53880)

On 07/30/2011 at 12:38am - animals - by loser4life - United States (Colorado)

Today, I realized the only reason my boyfriend is dating me is because he has a pimple fetish. FML

#17304312
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35976) - you deserved it (4477)

On 07/30/2011 at 12:35am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my 17 year old asked me whether to chew or swallow grapes. I raised this dumbass. FML

#17302566
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23348) - you deserved it (12862)

On 07/29/2011 at 10:10pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, my younger brother and I got into a fight over who the favorite child is. My mom overheard, came in the living room and said, "It's your little brother, now shut up." She was serious. FML

#17301122
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32033) - you deserved it (6194)

On 07/29/2011 at 7:36pm - kids - by Username - United States

Today, the heat rash that has been devouring my side for the last week was revealed to be something much worse: shingles. FML

#17300096
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27089) - you deserved it (2481)

On 07/29/2011 at 5:40pm - health - by ivannooze - United States

Today, my parents took me on a plane ride for a vacation in Hong Kong. What they didn't tell me was that the "vacation" is extended for three years. FML

#17297166
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40152) - you deserved it (2713)

On 07/29/2011 at 11:37am - misc - by xxxkkxxx - Hong Kong

Today, while working at Kohl's this woman came up to me and asked if I was Native American, I said yes, she then says "Oh! I thought you guys went extinct." This is the country I live in. FML

#17297056
326 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40895) - you deserved it (3233)

On 07/29/2011 at 11:18am - work - by crazygirl12 - United States (Missouri)



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