Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Offline (the 11/22/2015 at 5:24pm) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 465
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Derpenis : If you run, I like you

Derpenis's page activity

Visits<b>ashley_passion06</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 11:27pm<b>hotheadslav</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 11:18pm<b>abdiG</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 11:45pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 12:14am<b>jay_ladybug</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 12:56pm<b>soopafreak</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 4:50pm<b>Way2Fast8</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 12:35am<b>KBGL</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 1:12am<b>JonnyBoy18</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 8:31am<b>ZYLA</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 5:34pm<b>DMAN80182001</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 3:56pm<b>Merp17</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 12:28pm<b>seth7_</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 11:25am<b>thejewishfuhrer</b> - the 12/17/2013 at 1:04am<b>carleybeak</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 4:14pm<b>windell</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 1:20pm<b>Cuteroxx</b> - the 12/04/2013 at 12:39am<b>pickleOnABun</b> - the 12/02/2013 at 7:10pm

Fucked!<b>buckdharma</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 6:14am

Derpenis's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of Derpenis's badges

Derpenis's favorite FMLs

Today, my life became a lot more depressing. A while ago, some friends and I founded a "Forever Alone" club, because all of us were single at that time. I'm now the only member left. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24095) - you deserved it (2804)

On 10/18/2015 at 1:06pm - love - by Lena (woman) - Germany

Today, my new doctor asked if I'm sexually active. I said no. He nodded and murmured "No surprise there." Thanks, mate. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28516) - you deserved it (2527)

On 05/24/2015 at 11:56am - misc - by Mona Lisa was a skank-ass ho (man) - United Kingdom (Stockport)

Today, my bag got stolen with all of my belongings at the beach. After being forced to ask strangers for money, I then travelled home on the train for an hour, wearing only a bikini. FML


I agree, your life sucks (51426) - you deserved it (5235)

On 05/18/2013 at 4:57am - misc - by Chelsea - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I discovered why my boss kept on scheduling me to work doubles almost every day. It wasn't because she knew I needed the extra money; she was hoping that my boyfriend would break up with me because I'm never home, and date her instead. It worked. FML


I agree, your life sucks (69458) - you deserved it (4511)

On 04/23/2013 at 4:17am - love - by mybossisanass (woman) - United States

Today, I walked in on my brother giving his best friend a hand-job. I can't unsee this. FML

Today, I played Call of Duty with my new flatmate. He continuously lost and was outraged that a girl beat him. It resulted in him shouting at me, claiming that since I'm Muslim, I must be part of the Taliban, which would explain my gaming skills. FML


I agree, your life sucks (47698) - you deserved it (8705)

On 04/11/2013 at 5:11am - misc - by zahra_786 (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I was chatting online with a guy I really like, when he used the word "irregardless." I couldn't help but mention how little sense it makes, since it's a combination of two words meaning roughly the same thing. He replied, "lol what? your stupid." Jesus Christ. FML


I agree, your life sucks (33865) - you deserved it (9419)

On 04/05/2013 at 7:21pm - love - by pot, meet kettle (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my psycho abstinence-only sex ed teacher claimed condoms give 50% protection at most against pregnancy. I couldn't help but correct her. She apologized for her "mistake", saying, "It's just that we're not ALL sluts, Kara." Now everyone thinks I'm a raging whore. FML


I agree, your life sucks (44638) - you deserved it (6470)

On 03/22/2013 at 8:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML


I agree, your life sucks (43785) - you deserved it (28055) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Mselle Risa's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • FML Pics : The top 4 pics
  • They say that a picture is worth a boring bunch of words thrown at you by a corporate robot. That's true. Corporate robots are the worst. Anyway, the FML Pics app is still being downloaded all over the…

Tuesday 24 November 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: