About DeathBunny218 : :
Please allow me to introduce myself
I'm a man of wealth and taste,
I've been around for a long long year; stolen many a man's soul and faith.
I was around when Jesus Christ had his moment of doubt and pain,
Made damn sure that Pilate washed his hands and sealed his fate.
Pleased to meet you, hope you guess my name
But what's puzzling you is the nature of my game
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
I’m your new creative director
You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.
Today, my four-year-old son decided to bite my butt during prayer at church. The entire sanctuary heard me instinctively swear at him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10902) - you deserved it (18811)
On 04/03/2012 at 2:19pm - kids - by potatoebee - United States (South Carolina)
Today, the war against the pigeons on my veranda reached a new level. To try and get them to clear off, I gave my window pane a short, sharp knock. It broke into several shards, and not one of the totally oblivious birds moved. Pigeons 1, Me 0. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13957) - you deserved it (3531) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 04/03/2012 at 12:41am - misc - by Kilimanjaro (woman) - France
Today, I dislocated my elbow chasing my cat around the hardwood floors of my house in knee-high socks and wiping out going around a corner. The doctors suggested that I not tell people how it happened. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8071) - you deserved it (10801)
On 03/28/2012 at 8:00am - health - by hikari_chan_xo - United States (Michigan)
Today, I realized I've been confusing scenes from The Lord of the Rings with American history. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5357) - you deserved it (15729)
On 03/24/2012 at 4:06pm - misc - by Avery - United States (California)
Today, two drop dead gorgeous Australians asked me for directions. Being so shocked by their beauty and accents, I couldn't get words out of my mouth. The one said to the other "Nope she doesn't speak English", then walked away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15047) - you deserved it (6839)
On 03/24/2012 at 2:45am - misc - by jennag5 - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I twisted my ankle during a round of golf, after trying to do a fancy jumping high five. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5434) - you deserved it (14188)
On 03/22/2012 at 4:17pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, while driving home from school, I noticed one of our hot quarterbacks in the car behind me. Trying to impress him, I pulled into the driveway of an expensive-looking house. To my horror, he pulled in behind me and asked what I was doing at his house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8164) - you deserved it (45185)
On 03/21/2012 at 1:12pm - kids - by brooke (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, as I turned the shower on, I got covered in gravy. Turns out, my friends had unscrewed the shower head, filled it with gravy granules, then screwed it back on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19076) - you deserved it (1954)
On 03/21/2012 at 7:46am - health - by J Rush - United Kingdom (Powys)
Today, I paid $50 on a haircut. Halfway through, I realized the hair dresser was drunk. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18384) - you deserved it (3083)
On 03/20/2012 at 9:33pm - money - by Alyssa - Canada (Ontario)
Today, since I was grounded, I tried to sneak out of my room to attend a party by climbing out the second-storey window and down the tree. I was unharmed, but I probably should have checked to see if my dad was in the garden before climbing down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4527) - you deserved it (6019)
Today, I was warning a girl in my art class to be careful with a Stanley knife, as she had managed to cut her finger quite badly. Just as I said it, I sliced my finger open with a Stanley knife. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11670) - you deserved it (6402)
On 03/20/2012 at 12:33am - health - by insightful - Australia
Today, I found out what it feels like to get hit in the head with a bat. Not the wooden kind though. The one that bites and claws you when it gets stuck in your hair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17945) - you deserved it (1145)
On 03/19/2012 at 9:03pm - animals - by CA19oo - United States (Georgia)
Today, I went to see a dinosaur exhibition with my mum. We walked around and saw a huge dinosaur, made of plastic and rubber. She was very disappointed, saying that she thought there would be real live dinosaurs for us to see. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20041) - you deserved it (1567)
On 03/19/2012 at 7:43pm - animals - by bibi (woman) - Slovenia (Bohinj)
Today, I told my daughter that she should put some love into her cooking. She started kissing the ingredients. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14128) - you deserved it (10529)
On 03/19/2012 at 12:59am - kids - by FoodyFood (woman) - Australia (South Australia)
Today, I decided to hit on a very attractive girl. I guess I was too drunk to remember it was my family reunion. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6199) - you deserved it (28967)
On 03/18/2012 at 7:41am - love - by Austin Franklin - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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