About DeathBunny218 : :
Please allow me to introduce myself
I'm a man of wealth and taste,
I've been around for a long long year; stolen many a man's soul and faith.
I was around when Jesus Christ had his moment of doubt and pain,
Made damn sure that Pilate washed his hands and sealed his fate.
Pleased to meet you, hope you guess my name
But what's puzzling you is the nature of my game
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
I’m your new creative director
You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.
Today, I received a string of blank texts from an unknown number. When I asked who it was, I got a list of every place I've been over the last three days. I'm scared to leave the house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36347) - you deserved it (1910)
On 01/09/2012 at 9:34pm - misc - by liLbob6598 - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I came home with a friend to find my mom scratching my dad's butt with a fork. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25394) - you deserved it (1685)
On 01/09/2012 at 4:39am - misc - by maruskasommers (woman) - Czech Republic (Pardubicky kraj)
Today, I asked a waiter at a restaurant if I could go in the kitchen to compliment the chef. She turned out to be really pretty, so trying to be cool, I leaned back onto what I thought was a table. It turned out to be a stove, and my shirt caught fire. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8629) - you deserved it (21927)
On 01/08/2012 at 8:51pm - love - by Tiana - United States
Today, I had to bail my drunk husband out of jail after he and his best friend tried to steal a police horse from an officer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21577) - you deserved it (2917)
On 01/08/2012 at 12:42pm - misc - by bellaskyeb - United States
Today, I was surprised that my husband suggested we take a shower together to save water. He also suggested we should wear our bathing suits so we don't have to see each others "privates." FML
I agree, your life sucks (44608) - you deserved it (3856)
On 01/08/2012 at 7:24am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Virginia)
Today, I accidentally called my teacher "Babe". FML
I agree, your life sucks (23324) - you deserved it (9317)
On 01/07/2012 at 9:12am - misc - by randomgirl - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I accidentally called my teacher "Babe". FML
I agree, your life sucks (23324) - you deserved it (9317)
On 01/07/2012 at 9:12am - misc - by randomgirl - United Kingdom (London)
Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16177) - you deserved it (28455)
Today, I couldn't contain my laughter when a patient told me she'd named her unborn daughter Twinkie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25200) - you deserved it (3577)
On 01/06/2012 at 5:49pm - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my therapist told me, "I'm sorry, but I'm not qualified to handle your level of instability." FML
I agree, your life sucks (30291) - you deserved it (3822)
On 01/06/2012 at 11:16am - health - by Ixi_the_pixie - United States
Today, I was on the train listening to my iPod on shuffle. The "Oompa Loompa" song came on, and slightly amused, I started humming it. It wasn't until I noticed that the man next to me was a midget that I understood the horrified looks I was getting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26975) - you deserved it (6981)
On 01/05/2012 at 1:39pm - misc - by lorahayes (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, my mom told me she's a drug addict, sold my bed to buy meth, and then lectured me about how I should be okay with it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30765) - you deserved it (1521)
On 01/05/2012 at 6:43am - money - by cazorp (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I won a lifetime supply of pineapples. One problem, I'm allergic to pineapples. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25937) - you deserved it (3298)
On 01/05/2012 at 3:09am - health - by dusk - United States (Colorado)
Today, as an important meeting with clients was drawing to a close, we all stood up and they bid their farewells. My response was to blurt out, "Hello!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (14240) - you deserved it (6103)
On 01/03/2012 at 10:30pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, while I was in the break room at work, one of my coworkers walked in on me playing with my animal crackers, complete with animal noises. Now, the entire department won't stop teasing me and calling me Tarzan. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9917) - you deserved it (28144)
On 01/02/2012 at 3:55pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)
Monday 17 June 2013
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