Uhh hey, my name's Erin
I'm from Ireland, and im a teenager
Thanks for looking at my profile dollz.(:
(Im a GIRL btw :L)
Today, I woke up and looked in the mirror and noticed that my face was covered in glitter. I asked my wife about it and she said she put it on me while I was sleeping so that I would sparkle like Edward from Twilight when I'm in the sunlight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40146) - you totally deserved it (3653)
On 11/28/2009 at 12:32pm - love - by IB6UB9 - United States
Today, I was really upset after work, and tearily asked my boyfriend to bring something over to cheer me up when he visited later. An hour or so later he arrived, having bought me a brand new large purple dildo to "brighten my mood". FML
I agree, your life sucks (30232) - you totally deserved it (10852)
On 07/28/2009 at 9:34am - intimacy - by BigPurplePresent (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)
Today, Michael Jackson died. FML
I agree, your life sucks (75773) - you totally deserved it (51818)
On 06/25/2009 at 6:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today while eating with my kids at McDonalds, my son put his hand up and wanted me to give him a "high five." I went to give him a five, but he moved his hand at the last second and I ended up slapping him in the face. Now everyone there thinks i'm a child-beater. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38995) - you totally deserved it (3857)
On 06/12/2009 at 12:49am - kids - by downlowtooslow (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I got a call saying that my son was chasing all the girls in the class with his "Sword of Death" (my dildo). FML
I agree, your life sucks (53210) - you totally deserved it (24639)
On 05/21/2009 at 3:18pm - kids - by a (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, my boyfriend who has been overseas the last four months broke up with me. I sent him a care package two days ago. He'll get homemade cookies (his mom's recipe), naughty videos of me and a letter telling him how much I love him in about a week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51920) - you totally deserved it (2754)
On 05/14/2009 at 2:16pm - love - by bettycrocker (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I found out that my husband named our daughter after his favorite porn star. FML
I agree, your life sucks (69202) - you totally deserved it (4873)
On 05/08/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by Oblivious (woman) - Kuwait
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. We got on the discussion of animals, and I showed them a picture of my cat on my phone. Being a touchscreen, when her father grabbed it, it changed picture. To a picture of my girlfriend, fully nude. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20345) - you totally deserved it (52863)
On 05/05/2009 at 3:43am - love - by sunboy52 (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, my daughther said "I love you mom", to me for the first time I can remember. She is 16 years old. She said it because I bought her first thong. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45780) - you totally deserved it (6625)
On 04/30/2009 at 10:50pm - kids - by mylove (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was babysitting a four year old. He was mad and began hitting me. I told him to use his words not his fists when he's mad. He then began telling me how much he hated me and that I should go die and never come back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33529) - you totally deserved it (11793)
On 04/29/2009 at 9:34pm - kids - by GirlinGreen - United States (Washington)
Today, I was on top of my boyfriend having sex and I was looking away doing my thing. When I looked back, my boyfriend had headphones on and was playing air drums. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56943) - you totally deserved it (10638)
On 04/21/2009 at 1:37pm - intimacy - by BerryRockstar (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I drove past a firehouse that had volunteer firemen taking collections. I take out a $20 and start to roll the window down when I remember my window was broken. I ended up driving by, holding the $20 against the window, staring at the fireman. Now the fireman thinks I was taunting him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34456) - you totally deserved it (9679)
On 04/18/2009 at 1:09am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I was visiting my grandmother's house. She keeps the thermostat on 85 and after about 30 minutes I explained to her "I'm going to have to leave, it's just too hot in here". She replied: "You think it's hot in here, wait until you get to hell." I laughed. She didn't. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45677) - you totally deserved it (3533)
On 04/15/2009 at 3:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I found out my blood type is B. My parents are type A and type O. It's not genetically possible to be blood type B if your parents are A and O. This means I am either an adoptee, a mutant, or an illegitimate child. FML
I agree, your life sucks (77267) - you totally deserved it (2253)
On 04/11/2009 at 3:14pm - misc - by hedgehog5 - United States (North Carolina)
Today, for the first time ever, a woman saw my penis. I am 30 years old. The woman was my doctor. She snorted to cover a laugh and apologized. FML
I agree, your life sucks (96420) - you totally deserved it (9471)
On 04/10/2009 at 5:40pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)
