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Dave23

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Dave23

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 1593
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Dave23's FML badges

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Judgmental

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I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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Dave23's favorite FMLs

Taday a grl told me she couldn't text me anymore , cuz she was too trd an had to sleep!! Over the next three hours , she updatd her Facebook an Twitter accounts , an made a YouTube video of herself singing!! FML

#19994423
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26783) - you deserved it (5538)

On 07/31/2012 at 12:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

TODAY, I WANTD TO TAKE A ROMANTIC BATH WITH MY BOYFRIEND. I SET UP THE CANDLES AN HOT WATER, BUT I HAD TO TAKE A DUMP. AFTER MY BUSINESS WAS DONE, I CALLD HIM INTO THE BATH. HE WALKS IN, SNIFFS, GLANCES AT THE TOILET AN LEAVES. GUESSHAT I FORGOT TO FLUSH. FML

#19994389
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8021) - you deserved it (46611)

On 07/31/2012 at 11:53am - love - by TheMissMuffly (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out that the only reason my guy friends actually hang out with me at my house all the time is cuz they think my mom is hot. real FML

#19994293
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23187) - you deserved it (2150)

On 07/31/2012 at 10:21am - misc - by loser (man) - United States

Today, my 17-year-old daughter's friend told her that superglue works well as lip gloss. She tried it. FML

#19993820
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27454) - you deserved it (4483)

On 07/31/2012 at 1:36am - kids - by mcase - United States (California)

2day Ihacked off with a condom on an left it in the living room waste basket so it looked looool like I finally had sex with someone . real FML

#19993573
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14409) - you deserved it (37938)

On 07/30/2012 at 11:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Yesterday, I was at a barbecue with my extendd family. I was chatting to my grandma,hen my idiotic brother decidd to douse the grill with his cola. The hissing soundd so much lyk a Minecraft creeper that I instinctively screamd and practically looool shat my pants. FML

#19993096
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9033) - you deserved it (26674)

On 07/30/2012 at 6:21pm - misc - by NaKreen (man) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

Today, I Woke Up To Find Mah Cat Has Gone Into Heat. Her Favorite Thing To Do Right Now Is Sticking Her Ass In Mah Face An Howling Like A Nazgûl. FML

#19992743
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19644) - you deserved it (4026)

On 07/30/2012 at 2:05pm - animals - by soph511 (woman) - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

yesterday due to ma boyfriend teasing me about me possibly aving been concieved on a beac cuz I was born in Hawaii , I finally asked ma mom if I really was. Se said no , but ten told me in detail ow muc sex on a beac urts wen u get sand up yur ass.

#19991998
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24514) - you deserved it (5731)

On 07/30/2012 at 1:56am - intimacy - by skyplaysguitar - United States (New Mexico)

Today , I was taking a walkhen I noticed an elderly man on the ground , unmoving. Being a registered nurse , I tried to give him CPR. As mah lips touched his , he hacked a loogie and spat it into the back of mah throat. I swallowed. FML

#19991658
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34721) - you deserved it (5194)

On 07/29/2012 at 11:24pm - misc - by guy - United States (Ohio)

Today , while getting ready to go to bed , I told mah boyfriend that I feel depressed due to the lack of intimacy in our relationship. His response was to roll over , fall asleep , and send a deadly fart mah way. FML

#19990004
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21894) - you deserved it (3281)

On 07/29/2012 at 12:25am - love - by Anonymous - Denmark (Sjelland)

Today, I checked the app I had used during the night. It's supposed to record u while u sleep if u make any noise, an I had downloaded because my friends say I snore. The only noise it picked up was my parents having sex. FML

#19979186
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32671) - you deserved it (3275)

On 07/23/2012 at 4:08am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Wyoming)

Today , I found a tick half-burid in my nipple . mega FML

#19971025
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29599) - you deserved it (3131)

On 07/21/2012 at 10:30pm - health - by Luna - United States (New York)

2day I was using a penis pump fir the first time . It was awesome until it sucked mah left testicle into the tube . I'll be singing soprano fir ahile now . FML

#19949637
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12180) - you deserved it (40105)

On 07/17/2012 at 11:32am - intimacy - by tuggernuts (man) - United States

Today, mah boyfriend told me that mah vrginia looks lyk Yoda. real FML

#19939315
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31094) - you deserved it (5155)

On 07/15/2012 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my brother had a party with over 60 people in my basement . It turns out that five different couples had sex under the same comforter . The comforter was mine . FML

#19923012
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31513) - you deserved it (2752)

On 07/11/2012 at 9:29am - intimacy - by Sherry - United States (Connecticut)



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