DameGreyWulf

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DameGreyWulf

12Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 29 October 1990 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11325
  • Number of comments : 2580
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 41 posted

About DameGreyWulf : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zlfKdbWwruY

"Such a pretty lass, as benign as broken glass,
Such a pretty thing, gentle as a scorpion sting,
No one ever would suspect that her mind's completely wrecked."

DameGreyWulf's page activity

Visits<b>weedle99</b> - the 06/24/2016 at 8:22pm<b>deenasaur2</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 2:48pm<b>Kruitdamp</b> - the 06/04/2016 at 7:03pm<b>Chilupa</b> - the 05/24/2016 at 10:49am<b>itssnotfunny</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 3:09am<b>madgodvw</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 12:12pm<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 10:55am<b>YourGrammarSucks</b> - the 05/10/2016 at 7:18pm<b>Dalboz</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 4:05pm<b>19jburner</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 4:29pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 6:08pm<b>bolee997</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 6:31pm<b>WJM505</b> - the 04/05/2016 at 10:04pm<b>rivimatt</b> - the 04/05/2016 at 10:14am<b>kaliilac</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 5:31pm<b>melons</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 8:53pm<b>3051628</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 3:24am<b>iwillreapyou</b> - the 03/26/2016 at 6:25pm

Fucked!<b>iwillreapyou</b> - the 03/26/2016 at 11:25pm<b>Misicgal666</b> - the 02/12/2016 at 8:37pm<b>SashaTaras</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 1:40pm<b>psychopolarbear</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 1:00am<b>TacoloverSWE</b> - the 07/09/2015 at 4:35pm<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 12:41am<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 7:33am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 8:36pm<b>silentlyhannah</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 3:01pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 10:57pm<b>Gregor1234</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 11:21am

DameGreyWulf's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

DameGreyWulf's favorite FMLs

Today, I was trying to have sex with my boyfriend, David. I moaned his name and he whispered, "I'm not David." Then, with an Italian accent, he said, "It's-a-me! Mario!" FML

by Michelle / 08/28/2009 at 1:11pm / United States (Maine) / Intimacy

Today, I posted a status update on Facebook about how much I liked the Season Finale of NBC's "Heroes". My hand slipped to the right and it came out as "I really love Herpes. It's much better than everyone says it is". I didn't notice for few hours. FML

by NotThatKind / 08/24/2009 at 12:28am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, in Burger King, I was leaning against the railing looking at the menu. I saw an old man using the rail to walk, so I got out of the way. He ran his hand across my back and said "You're so cute, I'd like to take you home and lock you in my basement naked so you can't leave" and walked out. FML

by Anonymous / 08/21/2009 at 12:01am / United States (North Dakota) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was eating with a friend while walking on the sidewalk. A couple of pigeons were bothering us so I threw a fry onto the street. As a flock of pigeons were gathering around the fry, a truck drove by. Only four survived. FML

by anonymous / 08/20/2009 at 2:22am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was playing catch with my 6 year old cousin in the garden, when he demanded a piggy back. Trying to be the good cousin, I did so and he soon shouts "Run! Run!" so I do so. Suddenly he shouts "STOP! My winky's gone pointy". I gave my 6 year old cousin an erection. FML

by Girl / 08/18/2009 at 8:23pm / United Kingdom (Hampshire) / Intimacy

Today, my nose was itchy. As I reached towards it to itch it, I sneezed ridiculously hard. I punched myself in the eye and now it's all purple and puffy. FML

by Ahhwtf / 08/18/2009 at 7:47am / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend humping my stuffed rabbit. I thought he was trying to be funny until I saw that he had an erection. FML

by bunny / 08/16/2009 at 9:58am / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I finally had sex with this great guy I've been seeing. I thought I'd found a catch. We get into his room, start kissing, and things heat up. Everything is perfect until he reaches under his bed, pulls out a doughnut and shoves it into my mouth, snarling, "eat it, eat it!" FML

by esb / 08/13/2009 at 11:23am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I had to go to the police station to pick up my 42 year old dad. Why? He was caught stealing candy. FML

by ahhahaha / 08/11/2009 at 11:07pm / United States (New Mexico) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was sneaking over to my girlfriend's house. I sent her mother a text message thinking it was my girlfriend saying "There's a stalker coming in to make you his play mate ;]" Unfortunately when I got to her window I was greeted by her dad with a bat. FML

by Ohfman117 / 08/11/2009 at 4:30pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I was opening and sorting mail for my boss as part of my job. One package was delivered to the office instead of his home by mistake, since his house is next door on the same property. I didn't notice until I had opened it. I had to hand my boss an opened box of toys. Kinky ones. FML

by TMI / 08/05/2009 at 3:36pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I told my therapist that I suspected my partner was unfaithful, but I don't think he believed me. "What, did you find a membership card to a sex club in his wallet or something?" he asked. When I got home, I looked in my partner's wallet. I found a membership card to a sex club. FML

by thesockmancometh / 07/30/2009 at 11:21am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend told me that we would be living out one of his fantasies. When I showed up, ready to go, he began playing the theme song to Star Trek and asked me to call him Mr. Spock. FML

by saynotochrispine / 07/28/2009 at 12:15am / United States (Georgia) / Geek

Today, I passed a homeless person asking for change. When I politely apologized and told him I had none, he yelled angrily "who comes to this city without money?" I replied "apparently, you do." Wrong answer. He followed me, now screaming. FML

by re2K5 / 07/25/2009 at 12:39pm / Korea Republic of (Kyongsang-bukto) / Money

Today, I tried to break up with my boyfriend. He said no. FML

by Ella / 07/23/2009 at 10:26pm / United States (Illinois) / Love