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Dale_xD

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Dale_xD

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 13447
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About Dale_xD : I'm only here for the cake.

Dale_xD's page activity

Visits<b>GetErased</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 1:40am<b>Hrodrik</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 7:37am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 9:32pm<b>zeeman2015</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 8:21pm<b>nihar_1296</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 9:23am<b>yourfreind</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 7:59pm<b>myexactname</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 8:16am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 11:18pm<b>awkotaco333</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 6:51pm<b>MaryssaJean</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 2:46pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/26/2013 at 2:40pm<b>grogers311</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 6:13pm<b>Jjan04</b> - the 11/18/2013 at 8:18am<b>Monster27</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 6:12pm<b>izembo</b> - the 10/15/2013 at 9:23pm<b>singer0421</b> - the 09/26/2013 at 12:31am<b>mza418</b> - the 07/28/2013 at 8:14pm<b>larsa_cheban</b> - the 07/23/2013 at 8:34pm

Fucked!<b>GetErased</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 7:40am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 4:18am

Dale_xD's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

See all of Dale_xD's badges

Dale_xD's favorite FMLs

Today, I had just opened up some porn on my laptop when my mom walked into my room, so I slammed the laptop shut. I didn't know the speakers continue to function after the laptop is closed. FML

#5925
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17643) - you deserved it (48560)

On 02/03/2009 at 5:24am - intimacy - by hitmutefirst (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I made my new girlfriend orgasm for the first time. All she said after was "I drooled a little". FML

#4642
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36965) - you deserved it (5689)

On 02/01/2009 at 10:48am - intimacy - by nicknack22 - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend and accidentally called her Brad (one of my roomates name) when I came. Now her and her friends think i'm gay and my roomate Brad moved out. FML

#3435
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41858) - you deserved it (32397)

On 01/29/2009 at 4:44pm - intimacy - by GavinHosler - United States (Michigan)

Today, I got bored on the toilet and decided to paint my nails. I ended up having to wait half an hour to wipe. FML

#2738
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8276) - you deserved it (66501)

On 01/26/2009 at 8:17pm - misc - by crazyvulva9216 - United States (California)

Today, I tried to suck my own penis. Autofellatio. My mother walked in on me and I flipped backwards off the bed. ER and 10 stiches above my eyebrow later, I asked her not to ever bring it up again. FML

#2696
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17773) - you deserved it (73306)

On 01/26/2009 at 4:09pm - intimacy - by Boredom - United States

Today, I was masturbating lying on the lower bed of my brother's and my bunk beds. I finished jacking off and tried to get up to clean myself I hit my head on metal panel of the upper bed and passed out. Later woke up in my bed... found out my parents came home and saw me passed out naked holding a porn mag. FML

#2357
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16437) - you deserved it (45179)

On 01/23/2009 at 2:50pm - intimacy - by killmyself - United States (California)

Today, I put my paint brush into my cup of tea. FML

#1815
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9612) - you deserved it (21561)

On 01/20/2009 at 1:12am - misc - by Petridishoflove - Hong Kong

Today, I was having a cybersex chat with a "girl" on a website whilst at work. I noticed my colleague who sits next to me start cracking up with laughter. Turned out it was him I was chatting with and he was winding me up. Worst thing is it had given me a stiffy. FML

#1065
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12178) - you deserved it (51428)

On 01/14/2009 at 3:49am - intimacy - by diddlysquat - United Kingdom (Wakefield)

Today, I threw a rock in the air and watched it soar. And watched it come back down and hit me in the face. Gravity. FML

#1028
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7283) - you deserved it (50395)

On 01/13/2009 at 10:01am - misc - by Gale - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was so bored that I filmed my goldfish while it was eating. FML

#923
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23190) - you deserved it (5920)

On 01/10/2009 at 3:21am - animals - by Crystal - Sent from mobile version

Today, well, last night, I told my girlfriend that I'm a light sleeper, and that the slightest disturbance will wake me up. As a result, this morning when I looked in the mirror I noticed a bunch of stuff written all over my body, like "You see, you didn't wake up!", "Nor now!". FML

#703
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8887) - you deserved it (30872)

On 01/04/2009 at 10:33pm - love - by titou - Sent from mobile version

Today, my mother was vacuuming my room and found a towel under my bed. She asked "why does it smell so bad?" I replied "sweat". FML

#672
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14720) - you deserved it (36691)

On 01/01/2009 at 10:04pm - intimacy - by Noname - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I needed to go to the toilet. Thinking that everyone had left work, I decided that, since I AM a Jedi, my penis ought to be my lightsaber. All of a sudden I hear a familiar voice: "At least someone is having fun!" It was my boss. FML

#523
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9275) - you deserved it (33006)

On 12/15/2008 at 10:58pm - work - by lopez - Sent from mobile version

Today, whilst reading all 15 pages of this site, my French girlfriend asked me over my shoulder for translations, such as "What is buttsex?", "What is wanking?", and "What means farted?" FML

#513
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27225) - you deserved it (6527)

On 12/14/2008 at 8:14am - intimacy - by james - United Kingdom (London)



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