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Dale_xD

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Dale_xD

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 13498
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About Dale_xD : I'm only here for the cake.

Dale_xD's page activity

Visits<b>GetErased</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 1:40am<b>Hrodrik</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 7:37am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 9:32pm<b>zeeman2015</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 8:21pm<b>nihar_1296</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 9:23am<b>yourfreind</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 7:59pm<b>myexactname</b> - the 04/07/2015 at 8:16am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 11:18pm<b>awkotaco333</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 6:51pm<b>MaryssaJean</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 2:46pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/26/2013 at 2:40pm<b>grogers311</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 6:13pm<b>Jjan04</b> - the 11/18/2013 at 8:18am<b>Monster27</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 6:12pm<b>izembo</b> - the 10/15/2013 at 9:23pm<b>singer0421</b> - the 09/26/2013 at 12:31am<b>mza418</b> - the 07/28/2013 at 8:14pm<b>larsa_cheban</b> - the 07/23/2013 at 8:34pm

Fucked!<b>GetErased</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 7:40am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 4:18am

Dale_xD's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

See all of Dale_xD's badges

Dale_xD's favorite FMLs

Today, I kneeled down to tie my shoe and sneezed, nailing my face off of my knee and breaking my nose. FML

#63782
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47542) - you deserved it (6906)

On 02/17/2009 at 9:43pm - health - by ouchmynose (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
521 comments

I agree, your life sucks (258332) - you deserved it (88114)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)

Today, I decided to watch some porn before bed. The lights were off and my roommate was already asleep behind me. I put on my noise-canceling headphones and turned up the volume all the way. After a few strokes my roommate got up and plugged in the headphones for me. FML

#55493
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10956) - you deserved it (66436)

On 02/16/2009 at 7:24pm - misc - by lunarboy (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, in the middle of dinner, I went to rest my chin on my hand, missed, and stuck the straw from my drink straight up my nose. FML

#55148
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41262) - you deserved it (7516)

On 02/16/2009 at 6:36pm - love - by EK (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, it was my first day working at a milking parlor. As I crouched behind a cow to put on an udder cluster, I looked up and gasped just in time for the cow to crap on my face. FML

#35996
10 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45164) - you deserved it (6788)

On 02/13/2009 at 7:42am - animals - by abi_vet_student (woman) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh)

Today, I found out that when I masturbate at night while watching internet porn I cast a huge shadow on the curtain and the entire street is able to see it. FML

#30273
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23814) - you deserved it (52597)

On 02/12/2009 at 6:54am - intimacy - by Evil_Egbert (man) - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)

Today, my crush talked to me for the first time. He told me to stop staring. FML

#18236
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36199) - you deserved it (13961)

On 02/09/2009 at 7:37pm - misc - by hatethatiloveyou (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I played games on Barbie.com and gave up after 10 minutes. They were hard. FML

#14117
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11691) - you deserved it (40387)

On 02/07/2009 at 10:19pm - misc - by lilzoot (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, while my 4 year old nephew was hugging me, he stepped back and declared, "Auntie, my Pee-do is hard, but it will go away." FML

#11033
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35558) - you deserved it (3170)

On 02/05/2009 at 8:30pm - misc - by Fag_Hag (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I decided to send my boyfriend a pic text of me naked. I accidentally sent it to my dad and got a text back saying, "You definitely take after your mom." FML

#9520
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36541) - you deserved it (63354)

On 02/05/2009 at 9:09am - intimacy - by ruffrider (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was eating ice cream and I noticed some on my jeans so I wiped it off with my finger and licked it. It was bird shit. FML

#9438
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50545) - you deserved it (15743)

On 02/05/2009 at 8:23am - animals - by #201 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my inebriated boyfriend and I were having sex. He rolls off of me without finishing, and says, "I'm bored." FML

#7619
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45200) - you deserved it (7300)

On 02/04/2009 at 9:35am - intimacy - by na (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had a sexy dream, woke up and started to masturbate quite vigorously. When I finished, I hopped off the top bunk naked to see my brother and his girlfriend laying in the bottom bunk. FML

#6850
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18257) - you deserved it (51083)

On 02/03/2009 at 6:47pm - intimacy - by thermos (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend's guinea pig managed to go down her shirt. I have been dating her for 3 weeks and I haven't even kissed her yet. FML

#6301
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21258) - you deserved it (43032)

On 02/03/2009 at 12:22pm - intimacy - by Merdoc (man) - United States (Indiana)



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