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Dadothy's favorite FMLs
Today, I was forced to listen and politely nod with a smile on my face, as my boss droned on and on, explaining that everything in the universe is slowly getting bigger, aside from him, because he's never felt so short before. FML
by Megan / 06/17/2012 at 3:38pm / United Kingdom (Neath Port Talbot) / Work
Today, I was having a debate with my friend over tattoos. I used the example that you wouldn't put a bumper sticker on a Ferrari. He looked me in the eye and said, "Yeah, but you're no Ferrari. More like a Prius." FML
by kitty shah / 06/17/2012 at 1:01pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by pandora / 06/13/2012 at 5:08am / Israel (HaMerkaz) / Transportation
by Anon / 06/10/2012 at 12:19am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to a new deli in town. While waiting in line, I hadn't made up my mind on what to order, so I let the guy behind me go instead. Turns out he was the hundredth customer, and they gave him his lunch for free. FML
by kirsty / 04/08/2012 at 1:18pm / Canada (Alberta) / Money
by Miss_Kristen / 02/26/2012 at 10:31am / United States (Missouri) / Work
by Anonymous / 01/21/2012 at 9:22am / United States / Miscellaneous
by addicted2v / 01/21/2012 at 8:25am / United States (New York) / Love
Today, while riding back from a weekend away with my boyfriend, we crashed his motorbike, resulting in us getting thrown over a barbed wire fence into a forest. I woke up in hospital. Apparently, in his adrenaline rush, he climbed back on his bike and continued his trip, forgetting all about me. FML
by superficialheart / 01/21/2012 at 6:59am / China / Transportation
Today, I got home from my 6-week vacation. Apparently, my mum cleaned my room for me while I was gone because my vibrator was neatly tucked into my blanket, next to my pillow instead of being hidden under my bed. FML
by Anonymous / 01/21/2012 at 5:45am / Russian Federation / Intimacy
by Dockin / 01/11/2012 at 12:19pm / India / Intimacy
by mortifiedgrandchild / 01/09/2012 at 1:53pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to buy my prom dress. I felt really good as I walked out of the dressing room, until someone walked out of the room next to me wearing the same dress, and looked better in it than I did. It was a man buying it for his drag show. FML
by draggirl / 10/13/2009 at 1:26pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
Today, my vegetarian housemate cleaned the fridge. He threw away all of the meat in our fridge and made a nice sign stating "Meat is Murder". I was storing roughly $1000 worth of filet mignon steaks and seafood for my sister's wedding. FML
by carnivore / 09/22/2009 at 5:48pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous