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Cynical_1

Offline (the 10/24/2014 at 10:25pm) | Search for a member

Cynical_1

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  • Town/Country : ,
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 697
  • Number of comments : 62
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Cynical_1's page activity

Visits<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 3:49pm<b>Balgrash</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 5:22pm<b>stallionlover</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 3:17pm<b>Sara95</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 10:56am<b>Callilah</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 9:50am<b>KatHelm</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 3:47pm<b>powelale0000</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 11:41pm<b>zandalee</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 4:59pm<b>vaxc</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 4:37pm<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 3:00pm<b>ComoEsJuan</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 11:46am<b>winchestinalock</b> - the 05/21/2014 at 2:37pm<b>Devindelon</b> - the 04/02/2014 at 6:56pm<b>hanner12</b> - the 02/24/2014 at 9:46pm<b>tymarie2012</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 3:25am<b>jaffvis</b> - the 02/22/2014 at 10:30pm<b>JustinCredible42</b> - the 02/22/2014 at 10:19pm<b>Jak_Griffin</b> - the 02/22/2014 at 8:24pm

Cynical_1's FML badges

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An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

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Cynical_1's favorite FMLs

Today, I couldn't find my vibrator. After searching for an hour I decided to ask my husband. He quickly shook his head no. We've been married for ten years. I know when he's lying. FML

#21190761
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42487) - you deserved it (8646)

On 06/27/2014 at 9:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be witty to buy a miniature stop sign, and hold it up when she gets bored during sex. FML

#21180516
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50458) - you deserved it (14222)

On 06/19/2014 at 10:37am - love - by stopinthenameoflove - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I started my job as a driving instructor. My first client showed up piss drunk. FML

#21174767
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40225) - you deserved it (3933)

On 06/14/2014 at 8:34pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was hit in the face by the placenta of a cow that had just given birth. FML

#21158688
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46715) - you deserved it (5189)

On 05/31/2014 at 9:53pm - animals - by disturbed - Ireland

Today, I told my girlfriend that I love her. She panicked and blurted out our S&M safeword. FML

#21152151
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46424) - you deserved it (6414)

On 05/26/2014 at 11:53am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I had to take my daughter home from school because she had been caught flashing the boys during class. I tried to explain to her that it wasn't an appropriate way to act or behave but she interrupted me, "Mom, you don't even understand." You're right. I don't. FML

#21146764
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44865) - you deserved it (6292)

On 05/20/2014 at 10:24pm - kids - by HouseWife - United States (Missouri)

Today, I downloaded a movie for my mom that she really likes, "When Harry Met Sally". When she loaded the file, we soon found out it was actually some kind of obscure porno billed as "When Harry Wet Sally". FML

#21018145
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45207) - you deserved it (8986)

On 01/05/2014 at 6:48pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I received a poorly-written letter from my asshole neighbor in which he threatened to "sew" me because my dog shat on his lawn again. I went over, asked if he needed some wool for his sewing, and told him to stop being an idiot. Now he's apparently hiring a lawyer for real. FML

#20981890
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39113) - you deserved it (21727)

On 12/05/2013 at 5:26pm - misc - by possibly a sweater (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me but wanted to make sure that we were still friends, so he could still use my Netflix. FML

#20963690
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43815) - you deserved it (3424)

On 11/19/2013 at 7:19pm - love - by unwantedforlife (woman) - United States

Today, I read a seemingly serious article online about giving your smartphone some extra charge by putting it in the microwave for one minute. My phone is now fried. FML

#20864782
519 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17874) - you deserved it (128897)

On 09/02/2013 at 4:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)

Today, my wife of 12 years informed me that the only sexual activity she is interested in is foreplay, and she absolutely doesn't want to go any further than that anymore. FML

#20817944
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54513) - you deserved it (5186)

On 08/03/2013 at 12:01am - intimacy - by tigger2013 (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was on a movie date with my boyfriend, when he asked for a handjob. I thought I was doing well until he sighed, took my hand off, and said he could finish on his own. FML

#20761555
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52705) - you deserved it (17061)

On 07/03/2013 at 12:25pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, I saw my girlfriend for the first time in weeks. She had a hickey. FML

#20758014
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53614) - you deserved it (5802)

On 07/01/2013 at 2:03pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I went out on a date with a girl. Everything was going well until I shared how my family was affected by the 2010 earthquake in Haiti. She immediately got up and left, calling me a liar. Apparently, I'm "too cute" to be of Haitian descent. What the hell? FML

Today, a bug buzzed into my ear. In response, I punched myself in the face. FML



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