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Cute

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Cute
  • Town/Country : California, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 15 October 1992 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 4520
  • Number of comments : 60
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Cute : "Cheating? You can't cheat, it's a jigsaw puzzle!"

Hello, I'm just another female on FML. I'm pretty nice, you're welcome to hit me up to chat!

Cute's last visitors

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Cute's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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Cute's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the doctor thinking I had breast cancer. Turns out, I have a third boob. FML

#15057968
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38207) - you deserved it (4100)

On 02/20/2011 at 10:28pm - health - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I had my buddies over for a few beers and, trying to be cool, I told my wife to get out of the living room and back in the kitchen. I felt smug, right up until she said, "Why? Your mom doesn't need to be turned over for another 20 minutes, dick." FML

#15052365
392 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6862) - you deserved it (93403)

On 02/20/2011 at 1:44pm - misc - by :/ - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

#14835077
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67078) - you deserved it (6316)

On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Right before I was about to climax, he asks "Do you remember when you bought the homeless guy with one leg a hot dog?" FML

#14805791
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27804) - you deserved it (3875)

On 02/02/2011 at 12:17am - intimacy - by anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my maths teacher was giving my whole class a lecture on 'if you don't pay attention at school, you will fail.' She then pointed out out a man working on the roof and said: 'if you don't listen, you will end up like that guy.' That was my dad. FML

#14596121
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40846) - you deserved it (2642)

On 01/16/2011 at 12:07am - misc - by paperbox (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

#12677495
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39214) - you deserved it (11945)

On 08/22/2010 at 2:58am - kids - by Bailey - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I took my brother and nieces to the zoo. Two of the lions at the exhibit were mating, so I said, "They're playing leap-frog." My 4-year-old niece said, "Looks like they're fucking to me." FML

#12663575
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44025) - you deserved it (14244)

On 08/21/2010 at 12:49pm - intimacy - by mc_dreamy - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I pulled a muscle in my arm while wiping my own butt. FML

#12657778
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15162) - you deserved it (21898)

On 08/21/2010 at 2:09am - health - by clitorasaurus (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my Mom felt the need to walk around school and tell everyone to be nice to me because I just started my period. FML

#12616520
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49195) - you deserved it (2731)

On 08/19/2010 at 12:12am - intimacy - by Jordid - United States (Colorado)

Today, I turned the shower on the hottest setting so it would warm up quickly. I started to sing and dance around the bathroom. I got too carried away and pelvic thrusted the water, which I hadn't turned back down. FML

#12513717
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6636) - you deserved it (41841)

On 08/14/2010 at 2:27am - health - by Fire_Crotch (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I applied for a job and sent my CV, then realised I sent the example CV I got off the internet. Now they think Bob Brown who lives at 123 Sunshine Street is applying for a job. FML

#12261661
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8068) - you deserved it (32096)

On 08/02/2010 at 5:50am - work - by Julia (woman) - New Zealand (Otago)

Today, I walked in on my cat trying to mate with my favorite sweater. FML

#12226280
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23123) - you deserved it (6133)

On 07/31/2010 at 1:04pm - intimacy - by anon - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)

Today, I was looking through my boyfriends phone, when I found a naked picture of myself. Too bad I haven't sent him any. Ever. FML

#12187876
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33431) - you deserved it (13292)

On 07/29/2010 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by Sunshine.0.ninja - United States (Ohio)

Today, while getting a lump in my private region examined by a very cute nurse, I got a massive erection. The smartest thing I could think to say at the time to her was: "I haven't been touched there in a very long time." FML

#12051058
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30117) - you deserved it (13575)

On 07/22/2010 at 8:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. After removing my underwear, he started singing "In the jungle, the mighty jungle..." FML

#12030730
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22660) - you deserved it (46063)

On 07/21/2010 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by Wawawiwa (woman) - Namibia (Windhoek)



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Thursday 10 April 2014

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