About Cute : "Cheating? You can't cheat, it's a jigsaw puzzle!"
Hello, I'm just a female on here. Nothing out of the average.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Today, at my aunt's wedding, the time for the tossing of the bouquet came and the announcer asked for all the single ladies to gather behind the bride. I was the only one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32837) - you deserved it (2936)
On 08/15/2011 at 10:45am - love - by single lady - United States (California)
Today, I came home to find a window broken and my neighbours searching inside my house. Apparently, they'd heard a small child asking for help inside my house. I recently taught my dog to "talk." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20406) - you deserved it (3843)
On 08/15/2011 at 2:23am - animals - by Mumbling Mutt101 (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, our cleaning lady's son came to our house claiming that his mother had died of a heart attack. We gave him her entire month's salary as well as some extra money. A few hours later, our cleaning lady turned up for work. Turns out she doesn't have a son. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26847) - you deserved it (14653)
On 08/15/2011 at 1:45am - money - by duped (woman) - Pakistan (Punjab)
Today, it was my engagement party. All was going fabulously until my fiancé's dad decided to give us a toast, and completely forgot my name in front of all my family and friends. I've been with his son for 7 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25217) - you deserved it (2322)
On 08/15/2011 at 12:16am - love - by Alex (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, a girl came into my salon to permanently straighten her really long and curly hair. After several long hours, I went to the counter to charge her. She ran out faster than an Olympic runner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29711) - you deserved it (1891)
On 08/14/2011 at 8:47pm - work - by theultimatesalonfail - United States
Today, my religious parents were hosting a family dinner. Not only did we have to wait over an hour for my grandma to finally show up, but when she did, she had her 30 year old boytoy in tow. Apparently, "Granny has needs too you know, hahaha!" Goodbye peaceful family. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20502) - you deserved it (2454)
On 08/14/2011 at 4:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)
Today, I walked in on my mom ranting on about what a useless bitch I am. She was talking to my cat. It's not the first time this has happened, either. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24595) - you deserved it (2573)
On 08/14/2011 at 3:32pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, the guy at Subway asked if I wanted to make my sandwich a footlong. I'm not sure what came over me, but before I realized what I was saying, I'd told him that I couldn't handle 12 inches. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20708) - you deserved it (6997)
On 08/14/2011 at 1:44pm - misc - by Username - United States (New York)
Today, I spent $500 buying my lost cat back from a jerk who thought it was his. I get home and my mom tells me that she'd sold it to the same guy for $10 because she thought the cat was ruining my love life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29156) - you deserved it (5185)
On 08/14/2011 at 3:16am - money - by Username - United States
Today, I went to a party. I tried dancing in public for the first time ever. Judging by the whispers, stares and giggles, I'm never doing it again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21156) - you deserved it (3336)
On 08/14/2011 at 12:50am - misc - by Travolta - United Kingdom
Today, I slipped on a plastic bag that my mom, the hoarder, was keeping on the stairs. I fell and sprained my ankle, getting rug burn in the process. Her response? Getting mad at me, putting the bag back on the stairs, then getting another to add to the pile. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22268) - you deserved it (1971)
On 08/14/2011 at 12:36am - health - by MomLovesMeLessThanTrash - United States (California)
Today, I lost my virginity to the woman of my dreams. I finished before entering. I'm 28 years old. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36398) - you deserved it (8040)
On 07/22/2011 at 1:00am - intimacy - by James - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, while at my job at a Christian summer camp, I overheard one of the kids swearing. I politely said, "Please, only speak as Jesus would." He paused for a moment and replied, "Go to hell." FML
I agree, your life sucks (15775) - you deserved it (41198)
On 07/14/2011 at 4:14pm - work - by sbutler (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I discovered that my boyfriend has been having an intimate text exchange with a woman. She's the grieving widow of his friend who died three weeks ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24761) - you deserved it (2006)
On 07/14/2011 at 11:53am - intimacy - by TheGoodTwin (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, the whole family came together to celebrate my grandmother's 80th birthday. My grandfather read a poem he'd written about how he had taken my grandmother's virginity 60 years ago. It went on for about 30 minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26055) - you deserved it (2015)
On 07/14/2011 at 4:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Austria
Monday 17 June 2013
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