Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?

Crowe_Dovahkiin

Search for a member

Crowe_Dovahkiin
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1939
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Crowe_Dovahkiin's last visitors

lilabooluvr2aw3som3sauc3iNewKidAntonia583Dracoboxer357kiwi2006olpallyPrimeEvilTahirperdixNoorFMLBaustigt

Crowe_Dovahkiin's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

I NEED to know!

You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of Crowe_Dovahkiin's badges

Crowe_Dovahkiin's favorite FMLs

Today, I drove my drunk sister home after a wild night of partying. She did not go to bed as I expected; instead, she laid in the bathtub and cried every time I left her. Now it's 3AM, and she's using her bra as a lasso for various objects in the room. The best part is I work in 4 hours. FML

#19764297
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19110) - you deserved it (1840)

On 06/10/2012 at 3:54am - misc - by eddie818 - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I saw my mom changing the expiry date on milk. She genuinely thought this would make the milk sour later. FML

#19759587
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18795) - you deserved it (1229)

On 06/09/2012 at 9:54am - health - by WTF (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I was napping when my little brother cut off huge chunks of my hair. He thought it would turn me into the older brother he always wanted. He's 8. FML

#19756804
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17855) - you deserved it (1166)

On 06/08/2012 at 7:44pm - kids - by TimeForAHairCut - United States (Oregon)

Today, when I was laying in my bed, I looked on the opposite side and saw a spider the size of my palm staring at me. And if that wasn't bad, I found out it hops. I still can't find it. FML

#19756673
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21992) - you deserved it (1105)

On 06/08/2012 at 7:13pm - misc - by somebody - United States (Maryland)

Today, after a very painful mouth surgery, I went home to take a nap. Then my nose started bleeding, so I stuck a tissue in it and fell asleep. When I woke up, I was so high from painkillers that when I saw the tissue, I thought it was a ghost. I screamed so loud I burst a stitch. FML

#19750023
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24370) - you deserved it (3291)

On 06/07/2012 at 2:12pm - health - by LaurenB (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I got a lecture about being lazy and not being active enough for my age, which ended with, "When I was your age, I was out every night having sex with anything that breathed." Thanks Gran. FML

#19745357
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18877) - you deserved it (2256)

On 06/06/2012 at 5:37pm - intimacy - by BrianTheLion89 - United States

Today, my mother is trying to convince me to divorce my husband. He has a tattoo of a skull on his shoulder and she believes this means he kills people. FML

#19742769
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18522) - you deserved it (2140)

On 06/06/2012 at 4:06am - love - by facepalm (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my husband went nuts. He's quit his job and set out building an amateur bomb shelter in our backyard. According to him, there's "substantial evidence" that cannibalism is on the rise across the country, and that "it's gonna be like Resident Evil out there, babe." FML

#19738484
340 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22209) - you deserved it (2296)

On 06/05/2012 at 1:21pm - love - by why... (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I received my first negative feedback on my otherwise flawless eBay record. The woman who bought the item said it wasn't as delicious as she was expecting, so there must be something wrong with it. What was I selling? A new and unopened lipstick. FML

#19737959
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19140) - you deserved it (1302)

On 06/05/2012 at 10:48am - misc - by facepalm (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)

Today, I walked in on my mother stroking my cat and murmuring, "Don't worry, kitty. One day, you and I... we will rule." FML

#19734981
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20850) - you deserved it (1980)

On 06/04/2012 at 8:54pm - animals - by Scared (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I caught a coworker at my new job staring at my chest. Trying not to rock the boat, I took him aside and asked him to stop. He insisted he was just trying to read my shirt. Our company uniforms don't have writing on them. FML

#19728226
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16781) - you deserved it (1811)

On 06/03/2012 at 6:41pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, Child Protective Services came to my house, because my 7-year-old son told people at school that he was uncomfortable sleeping in his uncle's bed. I had to explain to them that the uncle in question died 2 years ago, and that's why it felt weird. FML

#19713901
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24820) - you deserved it (1895)

On 06/01/2012 at 3:02am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I saw my reflection in the computer screen and I thought I looked quite nice. I tried to take a screenshot. FML

#19712895
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4772) - you deserved it (21337)

On 05/31/2012 at 11:25pm - misc - by Mikaela - United States

Today, I couldn't find my hairbrush anywhere; I ended up having to brush my hair with a fork. FML

#19712062
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14211) - you deserved it (4633)

On 05/31/2012 at 9:14pm - misc - by jemila (woman) - United States

Today, I drunkenly staggered home and crashed on the couch. When I woke up I realized it wasn't my house. FML

#19710160
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8296) - you deserved it (20523)

On 05/31/2012 at 3:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada



Allison Myres Perry & Jim Perry 's illustrated FML

Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • FML’s Roommates from hell
  • If we could, we’d probably all live on our own. Exotic dancers would do our cleaning and housework; bartenders would serve us glamorous cocktails with mini paper umbrellas in them every hour on the dot. We would…

Monday 20 May 2013

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: