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Crowe_Dovahkiin

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Crowe_Dovahkiin

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4114
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Crowe_Dovahkiin's page activity

Visits<b>german_boy97</b> - the 10/11/2013 at 12:13pm<b>rob02</b> - the 06/19/2013 at 10:45am<b>aw3som3sauc3</b> - the 01/23/2013 at 3:03pm<b>iNewKid</b> - the 01/22/2013 at 6:44pm<b>Antonia583</b> - the 01/22/2013 at 5:54pm<b>Dracoboxer357</b> - the 09/11/2012 at 12:27pm<b>kiwi2006</b> - the 07/09/2012 at 10:16am<b>olpally</b> - the 06/12/2012 at 4:26pm<b>PrimeEvilTahir</b> - the 06/05/2012 at 8:35am<b>perdix</b> - the 05/28/2012 at 8:20am<b>Baustigt</b> - the 04/05/2012 at 3:13am

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Crowe_Dovahkiin's favorite FMLs

Today, I had this amazing dream that a beautiful girl was giving me head. It was getting really hot, so in my dream, I reached down to push on her head, but in real life I actually swung my arm down and punched myself in the balls. FML

#19918073
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18252) - you deserved it (36543)

On 07/10/2012 at 6:03am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I spoke to my hormonal pregnant wife about baby names. I told her I liked the name "Tabitha", and she went into a full rage about how all letters have textures, colours and emotions and how T is an evil letter. Apparently it's orange, plastic, and a needle trying to stab her eyes out. FML

#19913255
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25893) - you deserved it (3543)

On 07/09/2012 at 3:31am - kids - by LNamesOnly (man) - Australia

Today, after a particularly difficult late night workout at the gym, I decided to shower in the locker room. I must have passed out, because I later woke up naked, surrounded by police after someone called to report a dead body in the shower. FML

#19913171
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27089) - you deserved it (2778)

On 07/09/2012 at 3:06am - misc - by wetandnaked (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my mom and I somehow got into a serious argument over the ethics of capturing and training Pokémon. FML

#19910380
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18543) - you deserved it (6719)

On 07/08/2012 at 5:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I watched as my dad noticed a spider on the ceiling. Instead of getting a shoe, he pulled out a 9mm and shot it. I'm not sure if this is an epic win or a sign that my family is crazy. FML

#19903364
317 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29824) - you deserved it (3568)

On 07/07/2012 at 2:10am - misc - by kalikanna - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I sneezed my jaw out of socket. Yes, this is possible. FML

#19899616
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28585) - you deserved it (1835)

On 07/06/2012 at 11:03am - misc - by hotpatata - United States

Today, I was messing with my cat by moving my hand around under the sheets to make it look like a mouse, making him pounce at it. Without thinking, I brought my hand up to scratch my nose and was immediately attacked by flailing claws. FML

#19897806
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8342) - you deserved it (23999)

On 07/05/2012 at 11:31pm - animals - by ambushcat - United States

Today, my dad was driving me home and was angrily explaining how my boyfriend was a bad influence and that he was hanging out with the wrong crowd. After finally convincing him to give him another chance, we stopped at a traffic light just in time to see my boyfriend being chased by police. FML

#19887405
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10976) - you deserved it (33361)

On 07/03/2012 at 7:20pm - love - by Jenna (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, I asked the 7-year-old that I was babysitting if he could burp on command. He said he could, and began to demonstrate. It turns out he couldn't purposely burp, but he definitely could vomit on command. FML

#19884890
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8181) - you deserved it (24461)

On 07/03/2012 at 7:33am - kids - by ew (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, as I was getting ready to go to the midnight premiere of the new Spiderman movie, I was actually bitten by a spider. He gets super powers and a hot girl, I swell up like a balloon and get to spend the night in the hospital. FML

#19884595
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26209) - you deserved it (2088)

On 07/03/2012 at 4:03am - misc - by spiderfail - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mom called to chew me out for having my sister arrested. My sister broke into my apartment, rearranged my living room, and claimed she now lived with me. She then threatened me with a butcher's knife for not appreciating what she had done. My mom wants me to pay the bail. FML

#19884123
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33635) - you deserved it (2257)

On 07/03/2012 at 1:36am - misc - by needmorelocks - United States (California)

Today, my husband and I went to the store. Because we have no car, we had to walk four miles in the 115 fahrenheit weather. It didn't click until we were standing outside the door with a metric shit-tonne of ice-cream, that we'd have to tear ass back home to keep it all from melting. FML

#19876028
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6380) - you deserved it (24975)

On 07/01/2012 at 1:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my daughter's hamster pulled the water bottle off the glass, so I decided to super-glue the bottle back on. We came back an hour later to see if it had stuck, only to find both the bottle and rodent glued to the glass. FML

#19875784
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7499) - you deserved it (24013)

On 07/01/2012 at 11:59am - animals - by mommabuser -

Today, I found out just how easy it is to be launched against the wall and sucker-punched into oblivion by a 200-pound former Marine turned professional body-builder. I discovered this after I told my fiancée's dad that we were expecting a baby. FML

#19867923
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25089) - you deserved it (4167)

On 06/29/2012 at 7:57pm - health - by fuckjuggalos (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I let my daughter bake a cake for her brother's fifth birthday party. She showed up later with a cake in the shape of a cock and balls. Apparently it's okay, though, because "I frosted it to look like a rocket, hehehe!" I can't believe my balls spawned this moron. FML

#19867387
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20871) - you deserved it (5957)

On 06/29/2012 at 5:39pm - misc - by Nick (man) - Australia (New South Wales)



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