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Croquis

Offline (the 11/17/2015 at 8:07pm) | Search for a member

Croquis

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9106
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About Croquis : I enjoy things in an adjective nature.

Croquis's page activity

Visits<b>WyldStyle</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 12:12pm<b>SkipBeatOtaku</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 8:53pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 12/24/2013 at 3:02am<b>October3461</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 3:56am<b>cnparks1990</b> - the 11/06/2013 at 3:34pm<b>12asigo</b> - the 10/15/2013 at 8:25am<b>hatrickpatrick13</b> - the 10/14/2013 at 3:31pm<b>TitianSuperior</b> - the 10/10/2013 at 1:52am<b>anitriarose</b> - the 10/10/2013 at 1:01am<b>Jessica0928</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 11:46pm<b>JustBeingAwesome</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 2:08pm<b>mamoudi</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 10:09am<b>fish_ster</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 11:26pm<b>wiseman02</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 1:15pm<b>Random_kid0718</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 9:23am<b>cakefete2</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 8:33am<b>icrysometimes_</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 7:21am<b>CordellSun</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 4:31am

Croquis's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of Croquis's badges

Croquis's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized the moans I make when masturbating sound like I'm crying. I realized this when my neighbor pounded on the door asking if I was okay. FML

#20856552
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48931) - you deserved it (11994)

On 08/27/2013 at 2:34pm - intimacy - by crier - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found out someone has a crush on me. Normally I'd be fine with this, if it weren't for that fact that this guy informed me that he has collected pictures of me since the third grade. I'm turning 23 in two weeks. FML

Today, half-way through my trip to Florida, I received a call from my friend of six years. "I sort of had sex with your girlfriend while you were gone." He said it "just sort of happened." FML

#20855295
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61066) - you deserved it (4467)

On 08/26/2013 at 4:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I got sexual tingles while watching a Subway worker assemble my sandwich. FML

#20846728
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49260) - you deserved it (11928)

On 08/20/2013 at 6:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, I woke up to a very unpleasant feeling. Apparently, the tattoo I got on my arm a couple of days ago attracted hundreds of ants during its healing process. They were literally carrying away pieces of my skin. I can not get the feeling or image out of my head. FML

#20846451
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56708) - you deserved it (6346)

On 08/20/2013 at 3:04pm - misc - by aly55a_mariie (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my sister had an emotional breakdown because two guys love her and she can't pick just one. Meanwhile I'm single and spend my time laying treats on my floor in a pattern and watching my rabbit run in circles. FML

#20843729
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47642) - you deserved it (4120)

On 08/18/2013 at 9:36pm - misc - by Having a pretty sister sucks. - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out yet another of my guy friends liked me. I posted that I just wanted a guy friend that had absolutely no romantic feelings for me. My crush volunteered. FML

#20842536
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33717) - you deserved it (65653)

On 08/18/2013 at 12:41am - misc - by fail - United States

Today, someone told me that my initials really fit my personality. I took it as a strange compliment, until I realized my initials spell "ew". FML

#20832005
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46157) - you deserved it (4433)

On 08/11/2013 at 9:09am - misc - by ew - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while at a private lake, my colon declared a state of evacuation. I ventured as far from my family as my sphincter would allow, only to make eye contact with two very horrified kayakers mid-explosion. FML

#20830594
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45478) - you deserved it (5276)

On 08/10/2013 at 11:23am - health - by Oh-Shit! - United States

Today, I got a call from my son's kindergarten teacher. Apparently my son asked a girl to marry him. After she said no, he stabbed her with a fork. FML

#20829995
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63731) - you deserved it (5876)

On 08/10/2013 at 12:02am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, in the middle of examining me, my gynecologist suddenly took a sharp intake of breath and vomited on the floor. FML

#20826932
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60048) - you deserved it (16814)

On 08/08/2013 at 7:10am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Latvia (Jelgavas)

Today, I finally worked up the courage to write a girl a note, with my number on it, and the words: "You're stunning. Get in touch sometime." Heart pounding, I saw her, got up, and passed her the note. Then I passed out at her feet. FML

#20825416
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57160) - you deserved it (7509)

On 08/07/2013 at 11:46am - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I was video chatting with my boyfriend and his friends. When I stood up, he told his friend "See, she's not a twig!" I jokingly replied with, "So I'm fat?" After a few seconds of silence, his friend yelled, "It's a trap!" and left the chat. FML

#20825004
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47141) - you deserved it (14975)

On 08/07/2013 at 2:04am - misc - by ImNotFat - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mom's dog saw a cat in our yard. I watched as he tried to jump at it, only to smack face-first into the window. He did this twice more before curling up on the floor and whimpering pitifully. When my mom came in and saw him there, and me laughing, she accused me of beating him. FML

#20822442
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48047) - you deserved it (7113)

On 08/05/2013 at 5:36pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Sweden (Dalarnas Lan)

Today, I stepped out of the house for some fresh air. It was still dark out, so imagine my horror when I accidentally stepped on a frog. It squealed for a split second before being crushed beneath my uncovered foot. FML

#20822322
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46654) - you deserved it (6550)

On 08/05/2013 at 4:21pm - animals - by traumatizedforlife (woman) - United States



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