Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Croquis

Online | Search for a member

Croquis

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3615
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About Croquis : I enjoy things in an adjective nature.

Croquis's page activity

Visits<b>WyldStyle</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 12:12pm<b>SkipBeatOtaku</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 8:53pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 12/24/2013 at 3:02am<b>October3461</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 3:56am<b>cnparks1990</b> - the 11/06/2013 at 3:34pm<b>12asigo</b> - the 10/15/2013 at 8:25am<b>hatrickpatrick13</b> - the 10/14/2013 at 3:31pm<b>TitianSuperior</b> - the 10/10/2013 at 1:52am<b>anitriarose</b> - the 10/10/2013 at 1:01am<b>Jessica0928</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 11:46pm<b>JustBeingAwesome</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 2:08pm<b>mamoudi</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 10:09am<b>fish_ster</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 11:26pm<b>wiseman02</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 1:15pm<b>Random_kid0718</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 9:23am<b>cakefete2</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 8:33am<b>icrysometimes_</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 7:21am<b>CordellSun</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 4:31am

Croquis's FML badges

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of Croquis's badges

Croquis's favorite FMLs

Today, I've had my tenth "Christmas" dinner since Christmas last took place. My mum has gone nuts and keeps playing Christmas music, making these dinners, and refusing to let me take down the Christmas decorations. My dad is too whipped to save us from this hell. FML

#21016807
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44114) - you deserved it (4259)

On 01/04/2014 at 4:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend masturbating beside me. I asked if she needed a hand. She called me a pervert and now won't speak to me. FML

#21015691
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62570) - you deserved it (7352)

On 01/03/2014 at 5:08pm - intimacy - by notsohandy (man) - Denmark (Midtjylland)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because "we don't communicate enough". She got her friend to tell me this for her. FML

#21002970
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39921) - you deserved it (3358)

On 12/23/2013 at 9:48pm - love - by .... (man) - United States (California)

Today, while going down on my girlfriend, she stopped moaning and told me to stop because she couldn't fake it anymore. FML

#21001045
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51811) - you deserved it (14916)

On 12/22/2013 at 3:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me via Facebook. I cared more about the spelling mistakes he made than the actual message. FML

#20994896
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36609) - you deserved it (10549)

On 12/16/2013 at 5:43pm - love - by dana (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while trying to break up with my girlfriend, I somehow ended up begging her not to break up with me. I'm still not sure how that happened. FML

#20988052
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37646) - you deserved it (19143)

On 12/10/2013 at 6:38pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Bangladesh

Today, my grandkids went around my house claiming items to inherit. FML

#20984796
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49259) - you deserved it (3681)

On 12/08/2013 at 8:19am - kids - by blah! - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I received a poorly-written letter from my asshole neighbor in which he threatened to "sew" me because my dog shat on his lawn again. I went over, asked if he needed some wool for his sewing, and told him to stop being an idiot. Now he's apparently hiring a lawyer for real. FML

#20981890
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39096) - you deserved it (21709)

On 12/05/2013 at 5:26pm - misc - by possibly a sweater (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my neighbor put up an electric fence to keep my five-year-old son out. FML

#20980679
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37412) - you deserved it (12705)

On 12/04/2013 at 5:29pm - kids - by Awkward - United States (Washington)

Today, I reduced my psychologist to tears. FML

#20976567
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41988) - you deserved it (3925)

On 12/01/2013 at 1:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my mom told me that when my sister and I were born, the first thing my dad said was, "I hope they don't turn out vegetarian." I did. FML

#20971339
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36845) - you deserved it (9152)

On 11/26/2013 at 1:35pm - misc - by fack (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was playing monopoly with my boyfriend and a few friends. After I bankrupted my boyfriend, he turned to me and said, "I fucked your best friend last night, so who really won?" I turned to the best friend in question, she looked at the board and said, "I'd like to buy a house please." FML

#20967834
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59532) - you deserved it (4303)

On 11/23/2013 at 11:11am - misc - by I hate that game - United Kingdom (Wigan)

Today, I had to have a talk with my stalker. After telling him not to snapchat me, not to text me, and that I'm not interested, all he said was "I think persistence is going to be key here." FML

#20967638
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41805) - you deserved it (3326)

On 11/23/2013 at 3:02am - misc - by AshleyRose24 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to something tickling me. Thinking it was my cat, I reached under the covers to give her a friendly scratch behind the ears. I imagine the giant spider that was actually there enjoyed my terrified screams. FML

#20965814
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43468) - you deserved it (2923)

On 11/21/2013 at 12:52pm - animals - by thatsnotacat - Australia (Queensland)

Today, a girl and I were flirting and it was going well. Feeling bold, I asked what she would do if I kissed her. She smiled flirtatiously and said "Why don't you try it and find out?" I went in for a kiss, and she slapped me. FML

#20965644
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55869) - you deserved it (12480)

On 11/21/2013 at 11:10am - misc - by smooth (man) - United States



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: