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Croquis

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Croquis
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1749
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About Croquis : I enjoy things in an adjective nature.

Croquis's last visitors

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Croquis's FML badges

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

Socialite

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An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of Croquis's badges

Croquis's favorite FMLs

Today, I got fired for saving my company upwards of $6,000. I'm as confused as you are. FML

Today, I went to get my nails done for the first time in a while. I don't like to go that much because two of my toes are connected, and I'm very self-conscious about it. The man painting my toes started laughing when he saw them and called all the other employees over to look. FML

#20075771
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26286) - you deserved it (2024)

On 09/17/2012 at 2:32am - misc - by twinkletoes (woman) - United States

Today, my next-door neighbor decided to become a rapper. FML

#20075041
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13386) - you deserved it (1315)

On 09/16/2012 at 7:01pm - misc - by MyEarsHurt - United States (California)

Today, I was shopping with my boyfriend, when he suggested that I might want to buy a new loofah. When I asked why, he admitted he's been using it to scrub his ass crack for weeks. I use that loofah to wash my face. FML

#20074793
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21582) - you deserved it (2110)

On 09/16/2012 at 3:48pm - health - by Derp McShitstain (woman) - United Kingdom (St. Helens)

Today, I woke up feeling ecstatic, because last night, my crush had told my best friend he likes me a lot. I sent him a text message telling him the feeling is mutual. A little while after sending it, it hit me that his confession had only been part of a dream. FML

#20073337
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27517) - you deserved it (6142)

On 09/15/2012 at 6:16pm - love - by hannah (woman) - New Zealand (Marlborough)

Today, I got a mosquito bite inside my cast. FML

#20072649
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32445) - you deserved it (1697)

On 09/15/2012 at 7:36am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Delaware)

Today, my boyfriend called out the word "scalpel" when he orgasmed. He won't tell me why. FML

#20072555
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22903) - you deserved it (2368)

On 09/15/2012 at 3:36am - intimacy - by not the scalpel (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to the sound of my neighbor pleasuring himself. FML

#20072449
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22490) - you deserved it (2032)

On 09/15/2012 at 1:35am - intimacy - by anon (man) - United States (California)

Today, my five-year-old daughter asked me why moms don't swallow clothes, so that their babies won't be born naked. My husband burst into derisive laughter, and has now trained her into responding to the name "Derp-Derp." FML

#20071956
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18028) - you deserved it (1898)

On 09/14/2012 at 7:06pm - kids - by -___- (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML

#20071482
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14314) - you deserved it (23913)

On 09/14/2012 at 10:50am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I had breakfast with his grandmother. She told him how I'm prettier than "that Mexican" he'd brought home for dinner last week. We had dinner with her last week, and I'm that same Mexican. She then went on to how Mexicans are what's wrong with the economy. FML

#20071462
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24675) - you deserved it (2540)

On 09/14/2012 at 10:13am - misc - by MexicanMe (woman) - United States

Today, in the middle of what had to be the most amazing blowjob I've ever had in my life, my girlfriend had a mental breakdown and began weeping on top of my cock. FML

#20070700
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26298) - you deserved it (6813)

On 09/13/2012 at 8:06pm - intimacy - by blueballs (man) - United States (California)

Today, at work, I was talking to a Scottish woman when my coworker and I both told her we were also Scottish. To this she replied, "We Scottish people get around." I then said, "Tell me about it, I'm one of four siblings from my dad, he definitely gets around." She was talking about travel. FML

#20069784
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5401) - you deserved it (16484)

On 09/13/2012 at 1:19am - work - by jcedarholm (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML

#20068526
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37693) - you deserved it (2942)

On 09/12/2012 at 3:00am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was in a mall bathroom when two girls started making out in the stall next to me. Before I could leave, they got really into it and caused our shared wall to tear from its hinges and collapse on top of me. FML

#20067220
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31345) - you deserved it (2395)

On 09/11/2012 at 3:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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