Croquis

Search for a member

Offline (the 11/17/2015 at 8:07pm)

Croquis

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9951
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About Croquis : I enjoy things in an adjective nature.

Croquis's page activity

Visits<b>WyldStyle</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 12:12pm<b>SkipBeatOtaku</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 8:53pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 12/24/2013 at 3:02am<b>October3461</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 3:56am<b>cnparks1990</b> - the 11/06/2013 at 3:34pm<b>12asigo</b> - the 10/15/2013 at 8:25am<b>hatrickpatrick13</b> - the 10/14/2013 at 3:31pm<b>TitianSuperior</b> - the 10/10/2013 at 1:52am<b>anitriarose</b> - the 10/10/2013 at 1:01am<b>Jessica0928</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 11:46pm<b>JustBeingAwesome</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 2:08pm<b>mamoudi</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 10:09am<b>fish_ster</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 11:26pm<b>wiseman02</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 1:15pm<b>Random_kid0718</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 9:23am<b>cakefete2</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 8:33am<b>icrysometimes_</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 7:21am<b>CordellSun</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 4:31am

Croquis's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of Croquis's badges

Croquis's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old son covering my nose and mouth with his hand and complaining, "Noooo, you need to die now." FML

by life insurance for 1 / 05/30/2013 at 12:29pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, in the middle of our one year anniversary dinner, my boyfriend's ex-girlfriend showed up declaring her love for him. They left together and I had to take the bus home. FML

by anonymoose / 05/29/2013 at 8:39pm / Australia (South Australia) / Love

Today, I had to eat up a few specks of toilet paper to avoid spoiling "the moment" with my girlfriend. FML

by Anonymous / 05/29/2013 at 3:17am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy

Today, I told my boyfriend of ten months that I'm not ready for marriage. A few hours later he proposed at my grandma's 85th birthday party. She cried when I said no. FML

by Anonymous / 05/29/2013 at 1:28am / United States (Alaska) / Love

Today, an elderly woman couldn't afford all of her groceries at the checkout so she started to take out a few things. I offered to pay for her groceries; she thanked me and walked out. An onlooker then came up to me and told me that she does it to someone every week. FML

by $$$ / 05/29/2013 at 12:49am / Australia (New South Wales) / Money

Today, I had to make a poster for social studies. I decided to write "Nice ass" in hieroglyphics. Turns out my teacher can read hieroglyphics. FML

by Amber / 05/28/2013 at 7:42pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I was sending intimate pictures to my girlfriend and accidentally sent one to my best friend. He sent me one back. FML

by Abrams52 / 05/28/2013 at 1:44am / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy

Today, my grandma's chihuahua was run over while I was taking her for a walk. She later whispered to me, "It should have been you." FML

by Anonymous / 05/28/2013 at 1:05am / United States / Animals

Today, I waxed my upper lip hair. My boyfriend later told me that he missed my mustache rubbing onto his. FML

by mustache girl / 05/27/2013 at 7:10pm / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, a girl at my tanning salon was ranting about how expensive it was and how she wished there was a cheaper way to get a tan. I joked, "Like from the sun?" She angrily called me a "sassy bitch", screamed to my boss about me, and then threatened to sue us when he kicked her out. FML

by fuck you retail / 05/27/2013 at 4:18pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I found out that my husband of 12 years has been sleeping with my best friend of even longer for who knows how long. She actually tried to turn it around on me and implied that it was my fault for finding out about it. FML

by wow / 05/27/2013 at 12:17pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, I accidentally hit a cyclist with my car. In panic, I jumped out of my car and ran up to him, who was lying on the floor, motionless. As I was about to check his pulse, he jumped up and shouted, "I bet you thought I was dead, asshole!" He then punched me in the face and cycled off. FML

by i hit a cyclist / 05/27/2013 at 7:19am / United Kingdom (Nottingham) / Transportation

Today, a man asked about fishing in the river which flows beside where I work. I said you could, but anything you caught under 5 inches has to be thrown back. His wife then said, "Wish I knew that before I married him." I started to laugh. The man almost cried and complained to my boss. FML

by Anonymous / 05/26/2013 at 8:40pm / United Kingdom (South Ayrshire) / Work

Today, my girlfriend decided to wake me up from a nap by kissing me. I started kissing her back passionately, when she slapped me. Apparently, kissing her back automatically without "confirming her identity" counts as cheating. FML

by Anonymous / 05/26/2013 at 8:21pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I had a customer tell me how much she regretted not aborting her expected child, how much she hates the father, and described to me in immense detail what it is like to pee while pregnant. All within the 30 seconds it took me to serve her. FML

by mmmretail / 05/25/2013 at 1:09am / Australia (Victoria) / Work