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Cristian89

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Cristian89

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 9 June 1989 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2129
  • Number of comments : 63
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Cristian89 : Just here for the laughs :D
Ask for my kik if you wanna chat

Cristian89's page activity

Visits<b>seemetrot</b> - yesterday at 7:52pm<b>ROMAD</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 7:46am<b>ButterflyHaze</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 2:53pm<b>louisdenis805</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 11:46am<b>kaylaaa01</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 1:09am<b>Peck_Kcep</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 12:12am<b>nela25</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 10:51pm<b>SierraaaNicoleee</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 8:07am<b>BFons</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 2:12am<b>soccerforlife_27</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 12:36am<b>xIlluminated</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 11:15pm<b>KawaiiSushii</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 6:49pm<b>emleighb</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 5:52pm<b>Faithilicious123</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 3:50pm<b>watermelon1</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 3:38pm<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 1:18pm<b>marieeecc</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 8:04am<b>Anapaob</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 4:38am

Cristian89's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of Cristian89's badges

Cristian89's favorite FMLs

Today, I came home and found that my home had been robbed. The worst part? One of the thieves took a dump in my toilet and didn't flush. It doesn't even look human. FML

#21184110
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44666) - you deserved it (3217)

On 06/22/2014 at 11:10am - misc - by paywithpoop - United States

Today, a fly landed on my face. Before I could even react, my brother "helpfully" punched it hard enough to both kill the fly and knock me out. FML

#21182108
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41253) - you deserved it (3899)

On 06/20/2014 at 5:00pm - health - by blackchin III (man) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of)

Today, we had a guy come into the hospital with a carrot stuck deep in his anus. I've heard all kinds of ridiculous cover stories, but his took the cake; he claimed the phone rang while he was showering and he slipped onto a box of vegetables. Guess who had to extract the carrot. FML

#21179512
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51449) - you deserved it (4281)

On 06/18/2014 at 3:06pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I entered my late twenties. My hair's falling out and I'm putting on weight at light speed. At least I can keep my youthful appearance with the acne I still suffer from. FML

#21163683
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40364) - you deserved it (4497)

On 06/05/2014 at 7:12am - misc - by hifhfan (man) - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)

Today, I finally finished a drawing that someone had asked and said they would pay me for. I worked on it for multiple hours and was very proud of it. When it came to discussing payment, I asked what his best offer was. A pack of cigarettes. FML

#21161435
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38414) - you deserved it (7481)

On 06/03/2014 at 7:56am - money - by xerrika - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my tits. He ignored it and instead sent a picture of his dog "looking blazed". FML

#21161395
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40338) - you deserved it (14832)

On 06/03/2014 at 5:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, I got called "un-American" when I said I didn't care about Kim and Kayne's wedding. FML

#21154136
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60848) - you deserved it (5022)

On 05/28/2014 at 12:13am - misc - by Yeppets - United States (Illinois)

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time over dinner. I had to use the bathroom part way through, and ended up taking the foulest dump of my life. I cracked open a window on my way out, but my boyfriend's dad went in soon after, quickly retching and booming "What the fuck?!" FML

#21151127
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46675) - you deserved it (6689)

On 05/25/2014 at 12:09pm - misc - by great 1st impression (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, was my first day of work in my life. I was excited, and so was my dad, who saw me to the door and ruffled my hair as he wished me luck. I didn't notice until half an hour after arriving at work that he'd stuck his gum in my hair. Nobody bothered to tell me. FML

#21136840
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42700) - you deserved it (3428)

On 05/11/2014 at 4:30pm - work - by sheisselluv (woman) - Germany (Thuringen)

Today, my dad seemed moody, so to lift his spirits, I told him I love him. He just snorted, "You gay or something, boy?" Really mature, dad, really mature. FML

#21136683
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39900) - you deserved it (4732)

On 05/11/2014 at 1:57pm - love - by not gay in AL (man) - United States

Today, while working at Home Depot, a customer tried to engage me in a conversation about which gardening tool would "hypothetically" be the best to kill his wife with. FML

#21132614
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42205) - you deserved it (3429)

On 05/06/2014 at 6:47pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I had to take an urgent dump at work. I noticed too late there was no toilet paper left, so I had to risk doing a quick "pants around the knees" shuffle to the next stall. I locked eyes with the window cleaner at the same time I heard someone enter from behind me. FML

#21123743
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39047) - you deserved it (6122)

On 04/26/2014 at 7:29pm - work - by caught out - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my co-worker started talking in third person. Not only that, but he narrates his daily tasks. "Jeff reached for a stapler", "Jeff stapled a report". I have to sit beside this chimp for 8 hours a day, and nothing I say can end this. FML

Today, I realized how boring and sexually deprived my life is when I found a gas station ten cents cheaper than the one I usually use. It gave me both an asthma attack and an erection, simultaneously. FML

#21107421
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41575) - you deserved it (5750)

On 04/08/2014 at 3:56am - misc - by the long distance guy - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I noticed something written on the top of my toaster, so I used a finger to clear away some of the crumbs, burning my finger in the process. The writing? "CAUTION: Hot surface!" Thanks, toaster. FML

#21106752
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18557) - you deserved it (41999)

On 04/07/2014 at 1:02pm - health - by Anonymous - Canada



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