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Today, I woke up screaming. Why? Well, I was complaining to my dad yesterday about how I always hit the snooze button and just roll over when my alarm goes off, and how that results in me being late for morning classes. My dad thought he'd help out by placing a mousetrap on the snooze button. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29511) - you totally deserved it (16704)
On 07/21/2009 at 1:38am - misc - by emperor (man) - Bangladesh (Dhaka)
Today, I was playing paintball when I noticed a 9 year old fat kid sitting and crying on the ground. Thinking he'd fallen and was hurt, I walked over to him. He looks up and shoots me in the face, arm, stomach, and happy sacks area from 4 feet away then runs off. He was not hurt at all, and now everything tastes like paint. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33640) - you totally deserved it (4883)
On 06/09/2009 at 2:04am - misc - by Woody - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I was cleaning my father's study room and wondering why I did not receive my acceptance/rejection letter from a college I really wanted. I found the acceptance letter, on his desk, also approving of a full scholarship. The deadline to confirm was a month ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (80962) - you totally deserved it (2081)
Today, I called Tech Support because the computer program wouldn't let me open files for my online classes. After an hour, and being walked through the downloading process multiple times. There was a pause and he said "You're a F*ing idiot." and hung up. It still won't work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35018) - you totally deserved it (14145)
On 06/02/2009 at 4:42am - misc - by holliefall (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, on the way to an exam I saw a car accident happen. I stopped, helped the woman who was injured and waited for the paramedics. I was to late at school, the teacher didn't buy my excuse and I failed the exam. It was an examination of my first aid skills. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52321) - you totally deserved it (1940)
On 05/19/2009 at 5:21am - misc - by Sam (man) - Belgium (Oost-Vlaanderen)
Today, after spending the night hanging out with a beautiful girl we start to walk back to my place. Halfway there she turns and says, "I wish you were a vampire" and goes back home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (70826) - you totally deserved it (5514)
On 05/11/2009 at 1:12am - intimacy - by Hallllo (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I found my mother wandering the halls of my fraternity unescorted and asked why she was here, she told me she was concerned when I didn't pick up my phone for two days. She then informed me that she had also moved to the same city I live in. My mother moved over 600 miles to stalk me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42250) - you totally deserved it (2457)
On 05/07/2009 at 8:42pm - kids - by PetitPrincePerdu (man) - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, I was babysitting for my neighbors. Their 5 year-old had finally fallen asleep at 11 after two hours of stories and songs. No sooner had I tip toed out of the room did I realize that my cell phone had dropped out of my pocket onto the bed. It was ringing. It was their mother checking in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30877) - you totally deserved it (4734)
On 05/04/2009 at 11:39pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)
Today, while watching TV, I danced, sang along, and helped Dora the Explorer get to her Grandmother's house. It was the most fun I've had all year. I'm 21. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43551) - you totally deserved it (17638)
On 05/04/2009 at 5:09am - kids - by Amey (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I was outside searching for "treasures" with my son using small plastic shovels. All of a sudden he starts screaming. He dug up the bones of our old dog. I told him that we had sent him away to live on a farm, I even helped my son write letters to the farm owners. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12935) - you totally deserved it (58693)
On 03/27/2009 at 9:05am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Austria (Vorarlberg)
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