About Coop817 : I enjoy reading FMLs so I can laugh at others misfortunes because laughter is the best medicine. Except if you have aids.
I'm not here to make friends. If I was looking for more friends, I wouldn't resort to an app full of people competing for shittier life stories.
I don't want to be a grammar nazi but nothing on this app pisses me off more than a dumbass. However, people DO make mistakes. Having said that, If I make a mistake, I'll own up to it.
I enjoy long walks on the beach, sharing my feelings, cuddling while watching a long movie, and licking peanut butter off my dogs balls.
Sometimes I aim for thumbs up and sometimes I aim for thumbs down because thumbs up is too mainstream.
Obviously I'm not always serious. Calm your tits.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Today, I had to sneak out of work early to pick my 14-year-old son up from school. He and a friend had been found covered in Astroglide, racing each other down the corridor on their bellies. My boss noticed my absence from work, and now my son and I are both on suspension. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20960) - you deserved it (6058)
On 02/28/2013 at 7:15pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I pointed out to my boyfriend how Valentine's day, my birthday, and our one-year anniversary were all coming up in the next few weeks. He then promptly broke up with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29370) - you deserved it (7542)
On 02/08/2013 at 1:24am - love - by katelynm - United States
Today, I learned that my big, tough, strong dog is terrified of spiders when he jumped, knocked over a table and then peed on the spider to drown it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23899) - you deserved it (3033)
On 02/06/2013 at 8:59am - animals - by DogLover (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my husband started a conversation with, "In Pokémon" and ended the same conversation with "and that's why we should divorce." FML
I agree, your life sucks (36085) - you deserved it (2896)
On 02/06/2013 at 8:38am - love - by PokeWife (woman) - United States (Nebraska)
Today, I hired out a motel room so I could stay there by myself and lie to my mother and grandmother about having friends. This is the third time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25959) - you deserved it (12115)
On 02/04/2013 at 2:45am - love - by lonelyloser - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I had a half-hour conversation with my parents about going to college. I don't know what's worse, that they were trying to talk me out of it or that they're convinced that I'm going to get knocked up and drop out by the end of my freshman year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21417) - you deserved it (2063)
On 02/04/2013 at 2:12am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)
Today, I woke up to a voice-mail from my manager saying I had the day off. Excited, I made plans with my friends. A few minutes ago I got a call from my other manager yelling at me for not showing up, and the original manager revealed he had me confused with another girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23939) - you deserved it (1113)
On 02/03/2013 at 11:22am - work - by TheBaconater - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I went on a date with a very cute girl. It went well, until I accidentally called the blueberries in her dessert Oran Berries. I sheepishly explained that they're a berry from the Pokémon universe, at which point she excused herself, never to return. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17333) - you deserved it (25189)
On 02/02/2013 at 4:20pm - love - by Brock (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, I tripped while walking down a large flight of stairs. As I fell forward, I instinctively reached out and grabbed onto one of the guys walking up. I ended up taking him and two other people down with me, earning myself a great many disgusted glares as I dusted myself off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17891) - you deserved it (5304)
On 02/01/2013 at 5:53pm - health - by Awkward (man) - United Kingdom (Wolverhampton)
Today, I had to leave my ACT prep class ten minutes in to pick up my drunken father from his best friend's baby shower. I picked him up along with a bill for the damage. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19419) - you deserved it (1227)
On 02/01/2013 at 10:26am - misc - by kylie18xx21 (woman) - United States
Today, my grandmother walked in on me watching porn on my computer. She looked at the woman on the screen and said, "I used to have tits like that, but look what having 7 kids did to them." Now I'm scarred for life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16413) - you deserved it (24034)
On 02/01/2013 at 6:05am - intimacy - by Master Debater (man) - Australia
Today, my pants ripped while I was at work. I had to keep my balls to the wall while I dodged customers and edged ever closer to the break room. Before I could call my wife and ask her to bring a new pair, my boss burst in, got pissed, and made me go back out and deal with irate customers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19725) - you deserved it (1278)
On 01/31/2013 at 3:27pm - work - by fuckit (man) - Italy (Lazio)
Today, my mum got a new blender. Dinner was roast beef, broccoli, cauliflower, pumpkin, potatoes and water. In a cup. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29515) - you deserved it (2049)
On 01/31/2013 at 5:28am - health - by I'maboutobarf - Australia
Today, during my first day as a medical intern in a new ward, I was performing a rectal exam. My supervisor thought it would be funny to burst into the room and scream, "Who are you?! You don't even work here, you pervert!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (41280) - you deserved it (3134) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 01/30/2013 at 4:57pm - love - by dr mamour - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was trying to sleep away a fever, when my grandma woke me up. She was sitting next to me, shoving gummy bears into my mouth until I started choking. She laughed, ran away, and denied everything. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27627) - you deserved it (2015)
On 01/30/2013 at 2:59pm - health - by cay - United States (New York)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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