[fr]
[it]
[es2]
[tr]
[de]
[ru]
[se]

Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?

Contrius

Search for a member

Contrius
  • Town/Country : Chicago, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 13 March 1979 (32 years)
  • Number of visits : 5720
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Contrius : I'm in Mergers and Acquisitions...

Contrius's last visitors

FreezeMaselinkrider35jokerssmilerachelhuggotrystesseJaxroxxlindseyxxBookie2152

Contrius's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Contrius's favorite FMLs

Today , I won 20 dollars on a lotto scratch off. My friend, pissed, makes me split the money saying its collateral for the gas money used to get us there. He then uses his 10 dollars on a scratch off, and wins 500 dollars. The jackass wouldnt split it. FML

#945188 (196)

I agree, your life sucks (83405) - you deserved it (10475)

On 04/13/2009 at 4:51am - misc - by AJShow80 - United States

Today, my fiancé's parents visited. I keep chickens for their eggs, and his parents own a farm, so we had a connection. They told us to leave the house while they cooked us dinner. When we returned, we faced two steaming plates of chicken. My chickens. They had names. FML

#896114 (396)

I agree, your life sucks (149356) - you deserved it (16613)

On 04/10/2009 at 1:11am - animals - by lanbon182 - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend was giving me head while I was watching Star Trek and I accidentally called her Spock. FML

#279733 (538)

I agree, your life sucks (34531) - you deserved it (220477)

On 03/12/2009 at 5:30am - intimacy - by Noname (man) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

#253938 (1736)

I agree, your life sucks (363048) - you deserved it (401397)

On 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm - intimacy - by RC3Welly (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my husband found the box my morning after pill came in. He had a vasectomy 10 years ago. FML

#18272 (113)

I agree, your life sucks (21623) - you deserved it (293888)

On 02/09/2009 at 7:46pm - intimacy - by apricot (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)