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Colecto

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Colecto
  • Town/Country : Belgrade, Serbia
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 3 November 1992 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 1432
  • Number of comments : 34
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About Colecto : 'Digital Arts' student, actress, 'Mensa' member

Colecto's last visitors

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Colecto's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Colecto's badges

Colecto's favorite FMLs

­Today, my dog decided to fly through the front door like Superman. All 180lbs of her promptly slammed sideways into the wall, putting a dog-sized hole in the plaster. FML

#15726248
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23053) - you deserved it (3224)

On 04/10/2011 at 3:32pm - animals - by a man - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I went to meet the girl I'd been talking to online for a while, and fallen in love with. When I arrived at her house, my brother answered the door and took a picture of my shocked face. He and his girlfriend had planned the entire thing because I'm apparently the most gullible member of the family. FML

#14191848
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33675) - you deserved it (7437)

On 12/13/2010 at 3:29pm - love - by phonesage (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I asked my boyfriend in a sexy way "What should we do now, honey?" He answered, "Suck my dick?" I said "I was thinking of something more... romantic." He replied "Suck my dick in the moonlight?" FML

#13432324
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32664) - you deserved it (19790)

On 10/13/2010 at 9:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Spain (Asturias)

Today, we were building the homecoming float, the theme is Seasons of Love. We went around the yard and put random leaves on the float. My friend's dad looked at the float and said, "You do realize that's poison ivy?" FML

#13397678
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6704) - you deserved it (17863)

On 10/10/2010 at 9:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I nervously introduced my mother to my new boyfriend. I had to sit and watch her flirt with him for an hour. When I took her in the other room and confronted her about it, she said, "Don't you dare ruin this for me!" FML

#13241865
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33811) - you deserved it (2142)

On 09/28/2010 at 10:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Maine)

Today, I went on a trip with some people from work to watch a baseball game. Halfway through the game, one of my managers shook my hand and said "Nice to Meet You." I've been working there for 3 months. FML

#12472687
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22637) - you deserved it (3888)

On 08/12/2010 at 5:03am - work - by skyphoenix (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I got my sister to pluck my eyebrows. She shaped them wrong, so now I look constantly sad. FML

#11849273
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16351) - you deserved it (24975)

On 07/13/2010 at 11:02am - misc - by OhNo - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, I found out that my ex-boyfriend stole a pair of my underwear, and still wears them to this day. FML

#8553099
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23750) - you deserved it (2390)

On 02/22/2010 at 1:11pm - misc - by anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was working at a day care center. A 5 year old boy came up to me telling me he wanted to eat my face. Confused, I asked him why. He said, "Because your face looks like pizza." FML

#2406815
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44369) - you deserved it (4503)

On 05/29/2009 at 5:09pm - health - by PiZzA_FaCe (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I woke up really early before my mom so I could make pancakes for mother's day. I placed everything on a tray and even picked a flower, had a card for her and took it to her bedroom. She said "You shouldn't have, pancakes are fattening." She took one bite and fed the rest to the dogs. FML

#1807099
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56271) - you deserved it (2790)

On 05/10/2009 at 8:36am - love - by Anon (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, like every other day, I turn up at work at the security guard's gate to show my ID badge. Except that my brother had stuck a huge "FBI" sticker on it. My co-workers now all call me Mulder. FML

#1020
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12687) - you deserved it (2318)

On 01/13/2009 at 4:47am - work - by MAC - Sent from mobile version

Today, my flatmate was listening to opera on full volume all afternoon and now he's playing James Bond on the trumpet. FML

#621
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14269) - you deserved it (2208)

On 12/29/2008 at 1:09am - misc - by noname - Sent from mobile version



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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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