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Colecto

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Colecto

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 3 November 1992 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1888
  • Number of comments : 42
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About Colecto : 'Digital Arts' student, actress, 'Mensa' member

Colecto's page activity

Visits<b>gary3768</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 5:15am<b>Alexv572</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 5:24pm<b>battlehamster</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 10:32pm<b>Taylor22294</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 4:59pm<b>matty112422</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 10:25am<b>isabel0010</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 10:17am<b>ZY1431</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 10:05am<b>SnowboarderFX</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 4:54am<b>Elgaard</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 4:06am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 1:45pm<b>mazdatuner09</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 9:57am<b>jgilmanx13</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 4:53pm<b>xDochx</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 10:21pm<b>okthelegend</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 9:37pm<b>BobRoss9</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 3:13am<b>lifa</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 5:56am<b>obeykiddsmalls</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 6:34pm<b>dafuck_15</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 6:26pm

Colecto's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Colecto's badges

Colecto's favorite FMLs

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

#19959363
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10701) - you deserved it (36804)

On 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm - misc - by Bontempi (man) - France

Today, I had a few friends over. Wanting to seem cool, I yelled at my girlfriend to get me a beer. She chucked four bottles at my head. All my friends cheered her on. FML

#19957248
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6124) - you deserved it (70562)

On 07/19/2012 at 12:55am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend finally met my brother. He arrested him for drunk driving. FML

#19860817
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23857) - you deserved it (3081)

On 06/28/2012 at 2:11pm - love - by daniella101 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I foolishly told my husband that I know he's been holding back sexually, and that I was willing to indulge any sexual fantasies he may have. Now it seems that tonight, I'll be responding to the name "Fluttershy". FML

#19846265
398 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26059) - you deserved it (15692)

On 06/25/2012 at 6:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I finally achieved the perfect hourglass figure. Too bad I'm a guy. FML

#19844120
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21207) - you deserved it (4858)

On 06/25/2012 at 10:05am - misc - by Wwiimaniac (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my daughter tried to sneak out of the house. When I caught her, she freaked out and punched me in the face. She then "snapped out of it" and claimed she was sleepwalking. FML

#19842330
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25352) - you deserved it (3265)

On 06/25/2012 at 12:08am - kids - by abbielane - United States (Michigan)

Today, my sister was "sexting" her boyfriend over Apple messages. Since we share an iTunes account the messages appeared on my iPod. Apparently, he shouldn't be silly, and should wrap his willy. FML

#19841077
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28042) - you deserved it (3060)

On 06/24/2012 at 8:28pm - intimacy - by Addison - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my sister, knowing that I'm terrified of his face, taped a picture of Michael Jackson over our toilet. When I entered the washroom, I sprinted back out screaming. Minutes later, while in the shower, I happened to glance up at the ceiling. Guess who was grinning down at me. FML

#19753089
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25923) - you deserved it (8206)

On 06/08/2012 at 12:35am - misc - by ugh - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after a surprise candlelit dinner and a two bottles of wine for my birthday, my boyfriend and I decided to take a sexy shower together. It ended with us both drunk, naked, and crying, wedged into a small tub together, talking about our dead pets. FML

#19702897
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30642) - you deserved it (7421)

On 05/30/2012 at 1:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend called me, panicking. Apparently he had a headache, but wasn't concentrating on what tablets he grabbed, and accidentally took tablets for "relief of period pain". He was convinced he was going to grow ovaries overnight. FML

#19697677
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23084) - you deserved it (2451)

On 05/29/2012 at 3:54am - health - by sopheeah - Australia (Victoria)

Today, the Star Wars Cantina song had been stuck in my head since I woke up, as my brother was humming it. I finally managed to get it out of my head. Then my mom started to whistle it. It's stuck in my head again. FML

#19588733
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16455) - you deserved it (3640)

On 05/07/2012 at 7:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend cuffed my legs to the bed. After the sex we discovered one of the cuffs wouldn't open. After an hour of trying to pry them open, I had to waddle with him to the fire station to have them removed in front of 4 amused firefighters. FML

#19576314
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21588) - you deserved it (7808)

On 05/05/2012 at 8:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, my husband informed me that he has been purposely finishing before me in bed as a form of punishment for beating him at Mario Kart. FML

#19563136
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31443) - you deserved it (6139)

On 05/02/2012 at 11:46am - intimacy - by winnerwinner (woman) - United States

Today, I found out the guy I've been crushing on for many years thinks he's a werewolf. FML

#19536972
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24560) - you deserved it (4267)

On 04/27/2012 at 11:24am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while talking to my girlfriend, the subject of Darth Vader came up. That's when she asked me, "Aren't Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker the same person?" I don't know what's worse, the fact that she asked me that, or the fact that I got upset over her lack of Star Wars knowledge. FML

#19411033
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20307) - you deserved it (11744)

On 04/05/2012 at 7:29am - misc - by Nadaz (man) - United States (North Carolina)



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