About Colecto : 'Digital Arts' student, actress, 'Mensa' member
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Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML
I agree, your life sucks (53166) - you deserved it (7608)
On 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, my 17 year old boyfriend's mother bought him a giraffe onesie. He refused to take it off and insisted on wearing it everywhere we go. We live in Australia and it's our summer now. So far he has passed out 3 times in public because he over heated, but he still won't take it off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32539) - you deserved it (4908)
On 01/11/2013 at 6:36am - love - by GiraffeLover - Australia
Today, I was playing with my vibrator. I was getting close when all of a sudden it short-circuited and made a sound like a laughing clown, scaring me half to death. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22865) - you deserved it (4388)
On 08/30/2012 at 10:45pm - intimacy - by Geckosrock99 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my insane boss decided I poop too much. Now, every time I go to the bathroom, he follows me in and tries to get me to hurry up by reading passages from 50 Shades of Grey. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22813) - you deserved it (2184)
On 08/08/2012 at 9:53am - work - by blakeintheoffice - United States
Today, I went on a fifth date with a guy, and he asked me if we could be boyfriend and girlfriend. Just after I said yes, he pulled out a contract and asked me to sign on the dotted line. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21174) - you deserved it (2124)
On 07/25/2012 at 9:03am - love - by Unlucky (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)
Today, I told my son to go clean his mess of a room. He yelled, "Dobby has no master! Dobby is a free elf!" and walked off. He turned 18 a week ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20335) - you deserved it (9447)
On 07/25/2012 at 6:54am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I took a picture of myself seductively eating an apple. I don't know what I'm doing with my life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6305) - you deserved it (15838)
On 07/25/2012 at 2:14am - misc - by Rochelle (woman) - United States
Today, while trying to look cute and playing with my hair in front of a boy, I pulled a piece of my hair extension out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5287) - you deserved it (30087)
On 07/22/2012 at 10:13am - misc - by Roma-Jay - United Kingdom (Coventry)
Today, my neighbors bought a signal scrambler to stop their kids from going on the internet at night. Too bad it blocks my internet too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20637) - you deserved it (1461)
On 07/22/2012 at 9:57am - misc - by XxFA1LxX - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my sister and I had a huge fight because I flushed the toilet while she was taking a bath. The faucet for the bath was not running, but she insisted that she felt the water in the tub turn "scalding hot." She won't listen when I try to explain to her that it doesn't work like that. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19465) - you deserved it (1153)
On 07/22/2012 at 2:54am - misc - by Raaaaage - United States (California)
Today, some friends told me that my natural body odor smells like cooked beef and roasted onions. I'm disgustingly delicious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13003) - you deserved it (2660)
On 07/22/2012 at 2:34am - health - by hungry? - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I told my boyfriend I wanted to spice up our sex life. He suggested incorporating bacon. He was serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17511) - you deserved it (3983)
On 07/19/2012 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by cortanaisahobot - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8841) - you deserved it (31185)
Today, I had a few friends over. Wanting to seem cool, I yelled at my girlfriend to get me a beer. She chucked four bottles at my head. All my friends cheered her on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4462) - you deserved it (51336)
On 07/19/2012 at 12:55am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend finally met my brother. He arrested him for drunk driving. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18643) - you deserved it (2216)
On 06/28/2012 at 2:11pm - love - by daniella101 - United States (Louisiana)
Monday 20 May 2013
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