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Cmdr_Shepard

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Cmdr_Shepard
  • Town/Country : Georgia, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 27 June 1989 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 1410
  • Number of comments : 177
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Cmdr_Shepard : Hey guys, I'm a 22-year-old man living in rural Georgia. I'm a junior in college pursuing a psychology degree. My goal is to attend grad school and get a ph.D in Clinical Psychology.

I love reading FML entries, though sometimes they seem so outlandish that I'm being trolled. It also makes me sad reading about girls with douchebag BF's when I'm forever alone. :(

After a while, I noticed that many of my comments are at least a couple of paragraphs long. I'm not intentionally writing that long of a comment, but rather I usually have a lot to say and it can't be summarized in one sentence. If you're the kind of person that's all "OMG TL;DR" then I guess you'll just have to DEAL WITH IT.

Finally, I wish we could post pictures. My picture can be used for half the FMLs posted.

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Cmdr_Shepard's favorite FMLs

Today, it was wacky tacky day at my school. I did not participate, however, I did get voted the tackiest outfit in my school. FML

#13496277
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21281) - you deserved it (7151)

On 10/18/2010 at 6:49am - misc - by obsceene - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my schlong decided to enter Mortal Kombat with my pants zipper. Guess which of the two won a flawless victory? FML

#9133208
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24884) - you deserved it (6677)

On 03/16/2010 at 2:55pm - health - by liu_kang - United States

Today, I was awakened from a peaceful sleep by my crazy ex-girlfriend, who apparently copied my key before our break up three months ago. She was on top of me, stroking my beard, whispering: “He looks like Jesus.” FML

#6842444
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36351) - you deserved it (2891)

On 12/20/2009 at 3:47am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got a text message from a number I didn't know telling me, "Fine. It's over, have a wonderful life." I've never had a girlfriend and now I get broken up with by girls I don't even know. FML

#5815085
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29736) - you deserved it (3236)

On 10/13/2009 at 11:52am - love - by dudezilla (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I wanted to make love with my boyfriend for the first time. I wanted everything to be perfect. The CD kept skipping, the rose petals had ants all over them, and he couldn't get it up. FML

#5011183
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43435) - you deserved it (9845)

On 09/02/2009 at 11:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had to buy another pair of 'fat jeans', because my old 'fat jeans' became my new 'skinny jeans'. FML

#4926734
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21400) - you deserved it (51693)

On 08/30/2009 at 10:15am - misc - by FML (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, it was my high school graduation. Because our school colors were red, black and white, and our principal looked somewhat like Hitler, the senior class prank was to salute him when he finished his speech. I was the only one. FML

#2938815
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39930) - you deserved it (25191)

On 06/16/2009 at 12:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had to give a presentation about Adolf Hitler. I wanted to point out he was a very good speaker, and could incite a crowd. Instead, what came out was 'Hitler's oral skills made everyone go wild with excitement" FML

#2508726
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31736) - you deserved it (49740)

On 06/01/2009 at 7:12pm - misc - by Cail (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I made an appointment with a therapist because lately I've been feeling alone and like no one cares about me. I waited at her office for about forty minutes before the receptionist informed me that she must have forgotten about the appointment. I was stood up by even my therapist. FML

#971564
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (81745) - you deserved it (5185)

On 04/14/2009 at 2:41pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I got back my math test. Instead of taking the time to mark the mistakes, my professor just circled the bottom half of the page and wrote "OMG." FML

#853708
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (87994) - you deserved it (26170)

On 04/07/2009 at 2:37pm - work - by aviators (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, while working at a Subway store right next to a big hospital, there was a big line of people all getting their subs toasted. Without turning around, I asked the next person in line, "I'll bet you want yours extra toasted?" She was a burns victim from the hospital. FML

Today, I was denied acceptance to The University of Georgia. I was down all day so I decided to go to a party my friend was throwing. Thinking it would cheer me up, as soon as I arrive all I see is colleges on shirts, hats, and sweatshirts, most being UGA. It was a college acceptance party. FML

#673526
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50987) - you deserved it (5908)

On 03/29/2009 at 12:37am - misc - by oldskoolgrl (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went to Hot Topic to look for a poster of my friend's favorite band for her birthday. I found the perfect one, and I grabbed one from the bottom of the shelf that was rolled up into a long box. When she opened it at the restaurant, it was a picture of two naked girls touching each other. FML

#528307
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25565) - you deserved it (57137)

On 03/22/2009 at 10:45am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Tennessee)



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