Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Classic_PWN

Search for a member

Classic_PWN

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 9 May 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1864
  • Number of comments : 32
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Classic_PWN : Just a small town girl living in a lonely world taking a midnight train to anywhere.I also like cheap perfume.

Classic_PWN's page activity

Visits<b>Awesome58422599</b> - the 04/10/2014 at 1:31am<b>GLaDOS8899</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 4:59pm<b>GreenBeast</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 5:07pm<b>mrfuzzywiggles</b> - the 11/14/2013 at 10:31pm<b>AquanTheDragon</b> - the 10/06/2013 at 11:47pm<b>michel242o</b> - the 08/18/2013 at 3:47am<b>Jace_____Rains</b> - the 06/06/2013 at 12:39am<b>the_fat_rob</b> - the 05/17/2013 at 10:05am<b>Enzi</b> - the 05/04/2013 at 5:30pm<b>LilyK</b> - the 02/16/2013 at 7:55pm<b>JackisAmazing</b> - the 01/18/2013 at 6:05am<b>FuhrerBurg</b> - the 01/12/2013 at 2:40pm<b>VinoVeritas</b> - the 12/13/2011 at 5:55pm<b>lewok</b> - the 09/06/2011 at 11:51pm<b>SAgirl</b> - the 09/05/2011 at 7:09am<b>ChibiChibi</b> - the 09/04/2011 at 1:17pm<b>quraishakrueger</b> - the 09/04/2011 at 5:39am

Classic_PWN's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Classic_PWN's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I were messing around. When he slipped his hand down my pants, he scratched my pubic hair and said "scruffy, scruffy, scruffy." FML

#11513456
350 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30424) - you deserved it (33486)

On 06/28/2010 at 4:12am - intimacy - by megaladon - United States (California)

Today, I was walking around in the mall when I dropped my purse. When I bent down to pick it up, some guy came up behind me, humped my ass, then ran away laughing. FML

#11435482
329 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58319) - you deserved it (12377)

On 06/24/2010 at 8:45pm - intimacy - by WorstLifeEver - United States

Today, my parents took my laptop, cut the Internet, took my car keys and TV, and removed my bedroom door. Why? Because they thought the plant I was growing for my science project was a marijuana plant. Oh yeah, they took that too. My presentation is tomorrow. FML

#8965755
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32121) - you deserved it (2344)

On 03/10/2010 at 3:39am - misc - by Kevin - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I was really bored and decided to annoy my mom while she was doing the dishes. I walked up behind her, touched her shoulder, and said "Poke". She then donkey kicks me straight in the nuts saying "Kick". I know now to never bug my mom when she's in a bad mood. FML

#8905229
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8729) - you deserved it (32586)

On 03/07/2010 at 10:08pm - misc - by Numbnuts (man) - United States (California)

Today, while in a public restroom, a man entered the stall next to me and began vigorously wanking. He finished quickly, but as he was leaving he peeped in at me through the crack in the stall door. FML

#8875274
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20562) - you deserved it (1791)

On 03/06/2010 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by ThoroughlyCreepedOut (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I had sex with my girlfriend in her room. That means: Jonas Brothers posters on the wall, Jonas Brothers pillows, sheets, comforter and stuffed dog. After we did it, she apologized to her posters for having to see that, since they're pure. FML

#8865322
353 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29114) - you deserved it (7911)

On 03/06/2010 at 9:31am - intimacy - by ICantBelieveThis - United States (New York)

Today, I was in my room, in my briefs and texting my girlfriend. Suddenly, I got a massive erection and I decided to take a picture to send her. As soon as my camera phone clicked, my mom walked in. You can see my mom in the picture screaming at me. FML

#8861010
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8992) - you deserved it (26324)

On 03/06/2010 at 1:10am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, my husband admitted to me that he has a mental block about touching my boobs, because he's afraid that breast milk is going to spurt out at him. I had my son 5 months ago and I don't breast feed. FML

#8781188
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19977) - you deserved it (3472)

On 03/02/2010 at 8:03pm - health - by sunny_ca559 - United States

Today, I got sent out of the class for "inappropriate" behaviour. The teacher later forgot about me and sent a notice home to my parents stating that I skipped class. FML

#8691974
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24429) - you deserved it (6391)

On 02/27/2010 at 3:04pm - misc - by shnigel - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I found out that the acne under my arms was worse then the severe acne on my face. FML

#8557720
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24544) - you deserved it (3146)

On 02/22/2010 at 4:43pm - health - by baconrash - United States (New York)

Today, as I was about to leave my house in my brand new heels, I stepped on a dead mouse. My heel went through it. FML

#8370926
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28153) - you deserved it (4848)

On 02/17/2010 at 10:05am - misc - by juwkgo (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while working security at the mall, someone shat his pants. The shit dripped all over the floor and escalator. I was the one who had to stand near the poop so no one stepped in it. FML

#8230374
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23156) - you deserved it (2167)

On 02/14/2010 at 12:07am - work - by mallcop - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out the love of my life, my husband, is cheating on me. When I confronted him about it, his response was, "Don't blame me, you're the gullible bitch." FML

#7992828
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39811) - you deserved it (3460)

On 02/07/2010 at 11:03pm - love - by Hm (woman) - United States (California)

Today, it dawned on me that the most romantic thing my husband has done in the last three years, was a put a wedding ring on his xbox avatar. FML

#7945898
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23499) - you deserved it (2984)

On 02/06/2010 at 7:09pm - love - by browniepoints (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend decided to perform a strip tease for me. As he was stripping out of his clothes, he took his shirt and then pants off first. He was wearing zebra striped knee high socks and underwear. I burst out laughing. He left. FML

#7606758
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8991) - you deserved it (22953)

On 01/27/2010 at 2:35am - intimacy - by DuChaillu (woman) - United States (Washington)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: