Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Classic_PWN

Search for a member

Classic_PWN

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 9 May 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2169
  • Number of comments : 32
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Classic_PWN : Just a small town girl living in a lonely world taking a midnight train to anywhere.I also like cheap perfume.

Classic_PWN's page activity

Visits<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 8:55pm<b>OneDayDown</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 8:48pm<b>laneyk07</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 12:42am<b>ileenefudge</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 8:15pm<b>Awesome58422599</b> - the 04/10/2014 at 1:31am<b>GLaDOS8899</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 4:59pm<b>GreenBeast</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 5:07pm<b>mrfuzzywiggles</b> - the 11/14/2013 at 10:31pm<b>AquanTheDragon</b> - the 10/06/2013 at 11:47pm<b>michel242o</b> - the 08/18/2013 at 3:47am<b>Jace_____Rains</b> - the 06/06/2013 at 12:39am<b>the_fat_rob</b> - the 05/17/2013 at 10:05am<b>Enzi</b> - the 05/04/2013 at 5:30pm<b>LilyK</b> - the 02/16/2013 at 7:55pm<b>JackisAmazing</b> - the 01/18/2013 at 6:05am<b>FuhrerBurg</b> - the 01/12/2013 at 2:40pm<b>VinoVeritas</b> - the 12/13/2011 at 5:55pm<b>lewok</b> - the 09/06/2011 at 11:51pm

Classic_PWN's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Classic_PWN's favorite FMLs

Today, my baby-crazy mother expressed her concerns that I haven't conceived after a whole two months of marriage. Her advice amounted to "get divorced while you're still hot, sleep around until you get pregnant, then marry the winner." When I complained to my father, he supported her. FML

#14545580
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32839) - you deserved it (2722)

On 01/11/2011 at 1:46pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, at work, my computer started acting up. I told my boss I could fix it, but he told me to call the IT department instead. Neither the IT technician or his supervisor could figure it out, so I showed them what was wrong and how to fix it. I was promptly fired for wasting 2 hours of company time. FML

#14475268
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35021) - you deserved it (3612)

On 01/05/2011 at 3:25pm - work - by worksux (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend left me for my step-sister. He's been cheating on me with her for the past 6 months, and got her pregnant. I also found out that my stomach pains are due to the fact that I'm also pregnant. My family could officially qualify for Jerry Springer. FML

#14068536
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59716) - you deserved it (8802)

On 12/03/2010 at 3:56am - intimacy - by Annonmyus -

Today, I discovered my parents took me to a specialist when I was a baby because they thought I had a facial deformity. It turns out I'm just ugly. FML

#13990251
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33732) - you deserved it (2691)

On 11/26/2010 at 7:23pm - misc - by bleh (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend and my parents staged an intervention, and have asked me to go to rehab. What they want me to go to rehab for? World of Warcraft. FML

#13588897
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10001) - you deserved it (61881)

On 10/25/2010 at 11:06am - misc - by leve80paladin (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, a woman got out of a car to scream at me as I was walking with the kids I babysit, demanding to know where I was taking her children. Apparently the woman who pays me is also a babysitter, who I have been "covering" for on her party nights. The mother doesn't believe I didn't know this. FML

#13567448
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33237) - you deserved it (2345)

On 10/23/2010 at 8:52pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found a surveillance camera in my room. FML

#13490049
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46618) - you deserved it (3624)

On 10/17/2010 at 8:27pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I learned that my girlfriend gives good head. I didn't find out by getting one, I found out by my drunk best friend telling me. FML

#13213227
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30905) - you deserved it (2543)

On 09/26/2010 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, whilst at my awards night, I got a boner, right as it was my turn to accept my award. To avoid a awkward situation, I flipped it up and under my belt. This failed to make the situation any less awkward, because the head of my penis poked out through my shirt, in plain view of the audience. FML

Today, after nearly 2 years of continuous fighting in Afghanistan, my unit came home. We were booed at the airport. FML

#12810587
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (122288) - you deserved it (12025)

On 08/29/2010 at 8:39pm - misc - by soldierboy - United States

Today, my new girlfriend, with whom I have not had sex, showed me her collection of sex toys. She picked up one approximately the size of my forearm and said "This one is my favorite" now I'm scared for her to see me naked. FML

#12768681
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40430) - you deserved it (4405)

On 08/27/2010 at 5:15am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I bought my girlfriend an expensive chihuahua puppy because she was never allowed to have one as a kid. She was so excited and happy so she leaned in to give it a kiss. It bit her in the face, she had to get stitches, and they put the $500 dog to sleep. FML

#12192420
344 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35695) - you deserved it (7015)

On 07/29/2010 at 7:13pm - money - by Joseph (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I moved into my new apartment and met my new roommate. Immediately after shaking hands he suggested that we make a "masturbation schedule" to avoid any awkward situations. Way to avoid an awkward situation. FML

#11994829
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38274) - you deserved it (3761)

On 07/20/2010 at 12:53am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I watched a stray dog hump a garden gnome in my front yard. So did my two year old daughter. I've already had to stop her "re-enactments" twice. FML

#11806163
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33349) - you deserved it (4305)

On 07/11/2010 at 4:05am - intimacy - by awkwardsituation - United States (North Carolina)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: