Chyl

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Chyl

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1056
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Chyl's page activity

Visits<b>jadeluv</b> - the 09/02/2013 at 1:18am<b>epic13</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 1:38am<b>acerima</b> - the 04/12/2013 at 5:40pm<b>EasyJ</b> - the 04/09/2013 at 3:13pm<b>seeoseek</b> - the 03/15/2013 at 12:02pm<b>doubledutchy</b> - the 03/07/2013 at 4:55am<b>Garcia05</b> - the 02/26/2013 at 11:18pm<b>Artsygirl90</b> - the 02/04/2013 at 11:47pm<b>Jon012</b> - the 02/04/2013 at 10:23pm

Chyl's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Chyl's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband started a conversation with, "In Pokémon" and ended the same conversation with "and that's why we should divorce." FML

by PokeWife / 02/06/2013 at 8:38am / United States (Nebraska) / Love

Today, the rollercoaster I was on stuck upside down for a few minutes. I shat myself in terror. Then, gravity took effect. FML

by Anonymous / 01/27/2013 at 6:10am / United States (Colorado) / Health

Today, my five-year-old daughter asked me why moms don't swallow clothes, so that their babies won't be born naked. My husband burst into derisive laughter, and has now trained her into responding to the name "Derp-Derp." FML

by -___- / 09/14/2012 at 7:06pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML

by Anonymous / 04/01/2011 at 12:32am / United States / Love

Today, my best friend had set me up on a blind date. The guy demonstrated at length that he could do different cartoon voices such as Donald Duck, Droopy and many others the entire time. Oh, and he also kept wanting to talk about his farts. FML

by Court / 02/21/2010 at 9:12pm / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML

by Anonymous / 10/14/2009 at 1:01pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at walmart when my stomach began to hurt. I quickly waddled to the restroom in pain. As soon as I got in the stall, a huge crap exploded out of me. The child in the stall next to me started crying. When her mom asked what was wrong she said that I'd "killed her nose". FML

by poopshooter101 / 06/30/2009 at 7:53am / United States (Georgia) / Health

Today, I was at a frat band party dancing with my girl when I felt some liquid on my arm. Normally, I'll lick spilled drinks off my arms and being slightly intoxicated, I did. Then I realized it was chunky. The girl dancing next to us had puked everywhere and I licked her vomit off my arm. FML

by Anonymous / 04/18/2009 at 6:42am / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was on my way home from a friends house. I called home ahead of time to let my parents know. My dad picked up and in a panting voice said, "Now isn't a good time, drive around the block for 15 minutes." FML

by hlev24 / 03/03/2009 at 11:20am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, I realized the annoying squealing I hear every night isn't my guinea pig. Apparently my brothers girlfriend makes that sound when they have sex. FML

by KTK / 02/17/2009 at 8:00pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

by offbeans / 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I heard a man pleasuring himself in the stall next to me during my post lunch deuce. I was washing my hands when my boss walked out of the stall. I can no longer look at him in the face. FML

by Sleeper_C3ll / 02/04/2009 at 6:04pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy