About Chrisuh : smile
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, the captain of my school's girls wrestling team asked me out. I politely declined. She angrily locked me in the trunk of my own car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26196) - you deserved it (4052)
On 02/26/2012 at 1:12am - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my 18-year old son decided to run his hand over our wooden fence to try and get a splinter, as he "forgot what they felt like." Last month, he stabbed himself in the arm with a sewing needle because he "forgot what an injection feels like." I raised this idiot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25731) - you deserved it (5658)
On 02/25/2012 at 6:25am - misc - by badmom (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)
Today, I gave my grandparents my old cell to use since they needed an upgrade. I thought I had deleted everything until I received a text from my grandmother. It was a vagina shot I had taken for my fiancé with a message that said "You need to wear more makeup". FML
I agree, your life sucks (6920) - you deserved it (21037)
On 02/25/2012 at 1:16am - intimacy - by ashleynicolle (woman) - United States (Arkansas)
Today, I had to use antiperspirant deodorant under my breasts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19523) - you deserved it (4606)
On 02/24/2012 at 10:05am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland
Today, my dad was complaining about how he makes so little money, so I suggested he invent something. The first thing that came to his mind was an automatic animal masturbator. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18555) - you deserved it (2610)
On 02/21/2012 at 10:43pm - intimacy - by nothowtheydoitinalabama - United States (Oregon)
Today, my girlfriend said I could only take her virginity while I have a flaccid penis, so I won't hurt her. I get hard from just staring at her covered ass. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29821) - you deserved it (4067)
On 02/21/2012 at 2:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was showing off my sexy new lingerie set to my boyfriend. While we were getting frisky, he got really into things and ripped it completely off my body, destroying it. It cost me $110. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20272) - you deserved it (15013)
On 02/18/2012 at 7:29pm - intimacy - by Lilah - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I received a cute letter in my locker. It was in German, so I used Google translate. Apparently, someone hopes I choke on big fat cock. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21566) - you deserved it (2122)
On 02/14/2012 at 7:35pm - intimacy - by kittens go meow - United States (Georgia)
Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16178) - you deserved it (28457)
Today, my dad decided that he shouldn't have to wear clothes in the privacy of his own home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21997) - you deserved it (2059)
On 01/06/2012 at 6:25am - misc - by Anna (woman) - United States
Today, I had a job interview. I was feeling good about it until I saw the interviewer. It was a guy I had sex with and never called again. He remembered me too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12637) - you deserved it (33920)
On 01/05/2012 at 11:00am - intimacy - by jwshrieky - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my daughter brought her new boyfriend over for dinner. I realize now why she said we would get along great: we graduated high school together. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36999) - you deserved it (2327)
On 01/02/2012 at 8:10pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, my mother got incredibly drunk. She told me that only "sluts and whores" shave their pubes. She then told me that she's never once trimmed or shaved her pubes, because she's "moral." Thanks for that mental image, mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23603) - you deserved it (1832)
On 12/29/2011 at 3:16am - intimacy - by Grossed Out (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my mother got incredibly drunk. She told me that only "sluts and whores" shave their pubes. She then told me that she's never once trimmed or shaved her pubes, because she's "moral." Thanks for that mental image, mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23603) - you deserved it (1832)
On 12/29/2011 at 3:16am - intimacy - by Grossed Out (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my mother got incredibly drunk. She told me that only "sluts and whores" shave their pubes. She then told me that she's never once trimmed or shaved her pubes, because she's "moral." Thanks for that mental image, mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23603) - you deserved it (1832)
On 12/29/2011 at 3:16am - intimacy - by Grossed Out (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Monday 17 June 2013
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