Chrisuh

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Chrisuh

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 15 March 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 13388
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Chrisuh : smile

Chrisuh's page activity

Visits<b>Captobvious19</b> - the 11/13/2016 at 8:58pm<b>JordanODST</b> - the 11/01/2016 at 7:55pm<b>madnessking</b> - the 09/11/2016 at 9:34pm<b>ActuallyDavid</b> - the 07/24/2016 at 4:09am<b>TheDarkLight</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 7:47am<b>chewsef</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 2:11am<b>dno79</b> - the 06/11/2016 at 4:56am<b>frankmz</b> - the 05/15/2016 at 6:56pm<b>majoroftheair</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 2:45am<b>thomas5915</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 1:59pm<b>Jayroc</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 2:59pm<b>Kruitdamp</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 4:59pm<b>pred8885</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 9:31am<b>stuckintime</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 4:55am<b>getoffmyscreen</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 11:01am<b>MM100</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 1:26am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 7:21pm<b>ccameron12</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 6:28pm

Fucked!<b>dno79</b> - the 06/11/2016 at 10:56am<b>JordanODST</b> - the 03/18/2016 at 3:01am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 1:20am

Chrisuh's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of Chrisuh's badges

Chrisuh's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned that, when you ask your girlfriend "Do you think we're having sex too often?" she might interpret it as, "I don't think we should have sex ever again," and entirely stop talking to you. FML

by Sexless from Texas / 04/24/2015 at 7:38am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my husband came too soon during sex. He then tried to pretend it didn't happen and continued. He humped me with a half-erect noodle for about seven minutes before I finally called him out. FML

by Evra / 04/16/2015 at 1:04am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I asked my 5-year-old son how school went today. He sighed and said "Fuck off, dad." I thought kids only became such colossal douchebags in their teens. FML

by no, YOU raised him / 04/03/2015 at 5:15pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend thought it'd be romantic to take me to a strip club for our 1-year anniversary. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2015 at 1:10pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, a coworker jokingly noted that my signature looks like "Pedo". I couldn't see it that way, so I asked some other people for their opinion. They confessed they'd always thought it looked like "Pedo", but never said anything. My name is Peele. I've been signing it off as Pedo for 10 years. FML

by peele / 03/25/2015 at 9:10am / Estonia (Harjumaa) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to get a physical, forgetting I'd shaved my pubes the day before and still had bad razor burn. My doctor told me I had "dicken pox" and was prescribing me with shaving cream. FML

by parkoursam / 03/10/2015 at 12:45pm / United States (Illinois) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I had to fall asleep to my next-door neighbors having sex because our walls are paper thin. What bothered me the most wasn't listening to them doing it, but knowing that she was faking it. FML

by Mkimmi / 02/12/2015 at 2:39am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, I had my first threesome. It was me, my wonderful girlfriend, and her shithead cat after he decided my balls were a bag of catnip and just had to play with. Things ended pretty fast. FML

by OnlyAvailableID / 02/08/2015 at 3:35am / Australia / Animals

Today, I posted a photo on Facebook showing a side-by-side view of me before and after I'd tried out my new makeup. My dad commented, "What is this, Gollum cosplaying an Orc?" My mum, brother, and over 20 "friends" liked his comment. FML

by Anonymous / 12/19/2014 at 2:36pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Geek

Today, my sister turned the volume on my phone way up and changed the ringtone to a woman's blood-curdling scream. I found this out when she called my phone at 2am as I slept next to it. I pissed my pants and fell out of bed screaming in terror. I'll never hear the end of this. FML

by terdberglerforlyfe / 12/07/2014 at 3:54pm / Brazil (Sao Paulo) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. He's Latino, so I thought he'd like it if I made a bit of noise and called him "papi" while we did it. It freaked him out enough to kill his boner, and now he thinks I have some kind of incest fetish. FML

by Anonymous / 12/03/2014 at 12:06pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I had to go to my dentist about a chipped tooth. I got it after my hand slipped off my dick and slammed straight into my face while I was masturbating. FML

by Anonymous / 10/30/2014 at 4:55pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, my boss asked about the mass of deep scratches on my arm. I lied and told him it happened while I was trying to save my cat from a tree. Truth is, my cat is a sadistic asshole who stalks me and mauls me whenever he can. FML

by thewrittenrebel / 10/28/2014 at 3:40am / South Africa (Western Cape) / Animals

Today, I learned that if you give a squirrel a cookie, he'll climb up your pants in search of more cookies. FML

by MegasaurusRex89 / 10/17/2014 at 8:04pm / United States (California) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I finally lost my virginity. Too bad it cost me every last shred of self-respect and involved begging a hooker to take my money. FML

by Anonymous / 10/10/2014 at 5:51pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy