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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 15 March 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 12911
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Chrisuh : smile

Chrisuh's page activity

Visits<b>madnessking</b> - the 09/11/2016 at 9:34pm<b>JordanODST</b> - the 09/10/2016 at 7:43pm<b>ActuallyDavid</b> - the 07/24/2016 at 4:09am<b>TheDarkLight</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 7:47am<b>chewsef</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 2:11am<b>dno79</b> - the 06/11/2016 at 4:56am<b>frankmz</b> - the 05/15/2016 at 6:56pm<b>majoroftheair</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 2:45am<b>thomas5915</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 1:59pm<b>Jayroc</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 2:59pm<b>Kruitdamp</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 4:59pm<b>pred8885</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 9:31am<b>stuckintime</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 4:55am<b>getoffmyscreen</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 11:01am<b>MM100</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 1:26am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 7:21pm<b>ccameron12</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 6:28pm<b>JMCJester69</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 7:42am

Fucked!<b>dno79</b> - the 06/11/2016 at 10:56am<b>JordanODST</b> - the 03/18/2016 at 3:01am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 1:20am

Chrisuh's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!


You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of Chrisuh's badges

Chrisuh's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked a girl at the restaurant I work at if she'd had enough to eat. When she said yes, I said, "Are you sure?" I didn't realize how insulting it sounded until her equally overweight mom was up in my face, demanding to see my manager. FML

by hadrienne's pall / 05/13/2016 at 3:25pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I scored the number of a cute girl. I gave her mine as well, just before leaving the bar. As I waved her goodbye, I attempted to do a cheesy "call me" gesture with my thumb and pinky finger, and winked. For a reason unknown to me, I ended up flipping her off. I still winked though. FML

by killme.jpeg / 04/17/2016 at 9:04pm / Netherlands (Zuid-Holland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I staged an intervention for my dad, because his midlife crisis has spun out of control. When I told him he's now basically endangering his own life, he replied "Everyone's gonna die someday. Some sooner than others, eh porky?" FML

by Anonymous / 12/05/2015 at 1:49am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked my dad why the Wi-fi was down. He just replied, "Why? Horno can't get no more porno?" No, "Horno" has an assignment. WTF? FML

by horno / 12/02/2015 at 3:18pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I had to grab a large kitchen knife from my son, after I heard him convince his friend to join him in cutting off his finger, so they could "be assassins like Ezio." FML

by Anonymous / 10/14/2015 at 10:29am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I learned that your crotch can just light up on the body scanner in the airport for no apparent reason; and when that happens, a thorough pat down of that area will be performed by a confused security officer. FML

by Traveler / 10/08/2015 at 10:06pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I got in trouble for missing my shift. According to my idiot boss, "Crashes don't just happen." FML

by yeah / 07/17/2015 at 10:59am / United States (Oregon) / Work

Today, I went downstairs early in the morning to watch a movie. As I walked into the living room and reached for the light switch, I heard my dad say "Knew you'd change your mind. Get them panties off." followed by the sound of a zipper being undone. I've never been so mortified in my life. FML

by Anonymous / 07/15/2015 at 12:29pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally finished downloading a 60GB TV series after two weeks of waiting. Every single "episode" turned out to be Rick Astley singing Never Gonna Give You Up, on constant repeat. I almost respect the prankster's effort enough to not want to gut him like a fish. Almost. FML

by Anonymous / 07/10/2015 at 8:52pm / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous

Today, while lifeguarding over children at work, I started thinking about my girlfriend and got a hard on. Before I realized it, I saved a kid and then hopped out of the pool next to a 5 year old in front of my managers and a little over 50 patrons with a raging boner. My HR meeting is tomorrow. FML

by notacreep / 07/06/2015 at 1:28pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I found out where my sister's pet lizard escaped to. I also found out that the little shit likes to hide in dark, cold places. I discovered this when I heard the bastard squeal as I started the lawnmower. FML

by Alex Andreas / 07/01/2015 at 11:10pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Animals

Today, another idiot was admitted to my hospital with a foreign object up his ass. Yet again, the excuse went along the lines of "I tripped and fell on it." Please, someone tell me how you can accidentally trip anus-first onto the end of a cucumber, which just so happens to have a condom on it. FML

by Idiot says "HIPAA violation" / 06/26/2015 at 9:21pm / United States (Virginia) / Work

Today, I realized that my new haircut makes me look like a movie star. Not Scarlett Johansson, no. I look like Lord Farquaad. FML

by henrylikestreats / 04/30/2015 at 2:04pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I kept hearing a child creepily giggling in my living room. I couldn't sleep and got so scared that I started considering hiring an exorcist. Long story short: be careful if you have Bluetooth speakers, because your dickhead neighbor might hack them and start fucking with you. FML

by Anonymous / 04/29/2015 at 1:42pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found my son's porn. I would sit him down for a talk, but the genres were so disturbing that I'm afraid to even ask about it. FML

by anonymousyo / 04/24/2015 at 6:04pm / United States (California) / Kids