Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Chrisuh

Online | Search for a member

Chrisuh

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 15 March 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 10489
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Chrisuh : smile

Chrisuh's page activity

Visits<b>Jayroc</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 2:55pm<b>Monday_funday</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 5:01pm<b>Zach_attack_</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 6:48am<b>broncosfan1996</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 1:24am<b>swarm20</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 1:03am<b>ekimen</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 7:54am<b>Philiphead</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 8:38am<b>Darkness_Hate</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 3:27pm<b>ZY1431</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 8:56am<b>skychu</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 1:06am<b>Andicc</b> - the 02/20/2014 at 4:22pm<b>VampOfSavannah</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 6:56pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 11/16/2013 at 11:41am<b>Crash7777</b> - the 10/01/2013 at 1:08am<b>jerzjay</b> - the 09/29/2013 at 2:59pm<b>Joshwarrior</b> - the 09/21/2013 at 8:36pm<b>lewisite</b> - the 09/21/2013 at 5:43pm<b>Izzyduck07</b> - the 09/21/2013 at 3:37pm

Chrisuh's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of Chrisuh's badges

Chrisuh's favorite FMLs

Today, I got in trouble for missing my shift. According to my idiot boss, "Crashes don't just happen." FML

#21442988
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25783) - you deserved it (1682)

On 07/17/2015 at 10:59am - work - by yeah - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went downstairs early in the morning to watch a movie. As I walked into the living room and reached for the light switch, I heard my dad say "Knew you'd change your mind. Get them panties off." followed by the sound of a zipper being undone. I've never been so mortified in my life. FML

#21442030
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32884) - you deserved it (2317)

On 07/15/2015 at 12:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I finally finished downloading a 60GB TV series after two weeks of waiting. Every single "episode" turned out to be Rick Astley singing Never Gonna Give You Up, on constant repeat. I almost respect the prankster's effort enough to not want to gut him like a fish. Almost. FML

#21439737
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27581) - you deserved it (7322)

On 07/10/2015 at 8:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, while lifeguarding over children at work, I started thinking about my girlfriend and got a hard on. Before I realized it, I saved a kid and then hopped out of the pool next to a 5 year old in front of my managers and a little over 50 patrons with a raging boner. My HR meeting is tomorrow. FML

#21437372
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25817) - you deserved it (6613)

On 07/06/2015 at 1:28pm - intimacy - by notacreep - United States (California)

Today, I found out where my sister's pet lizard escaped to. I also found out that the little shit likes to hide in dark, cold places. I discovered this when I heard the bastard squeal as I started the lawnmower. FML

#21435132
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23408) - you deserved it (1948)

On 07/01/2015 at 11:10pm - animals - by Alex Andreas - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, another idiot was admitted to my hospital with a foreign object up his ass. Yet again, the excuse went along the lines of "I tripped and fell on it." Please, someone tell me how you can accidentally trip anus-first onto the end of a cucumber, which just so happens to have a condom on it. FML

#21432533
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31309) - you deserved it (2151)

On 06/26/2015 at 9:21pm - work - by Idiot says "HIPAA violation" (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I kept hearing a child creepily giggling in my living room. I couldn't sleep and got so scared that I started considering hiring an exorcist. Long story short: be careful if you have Bluetooth speakers, because your dickhead neighbor might hack them and start fucking with you. FML

#21401745
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33878) - you deserved it (4529)

On 04/29/2015 at 1:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found my son's porn. I would sit him down for a talk, but the genres were so disturbing that I'm afraid to even ask about it. FML

#21399141
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30236) - you deserved it (3565)

On 04/24/2015 at 6:04pm - kids - by anonymousyo - United States (California)

Today, I learned that, when you ask your girlfriend "Do you think we're having sex too often?" she might interpret it as, "I don't think we should have sex ever again," and entirely stop talking to you. FML

#21398912
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24207) - you deserved it (10824)

On 04/24/2015 at 7:38am - intimacy - by Sexless from Texas - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband came too soon during sex. He then tried to pretend it didn't happen and continued. He humped me with a half-erect noodle for about seven minutes before I finally called him out. FML

#21394468
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32401) - you deserved it (4929)

On 04/16/2015 at 1:04am - intimacy - by Evra (woman) - United States

Today, I asked my 5-year-old son how school went today. He sighed and said "Fuck off, dad." I thought kids only became such colossal douchebags in their teens. FML

#21387117
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29025) - you deserved it (5486)

On 04/03/2015 at 5:15pm - kids - by no, YOU raised him (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my boyfriend thought it'd be romantic to take me to a strip club for our 1-year anniversary. FML

#21382971
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28402) - you deserved it (3493)

On 03/28/2015 at 1:10pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, a coworker jokingly noted that my signature looks like "Pedo". I couldn't see it that way, so I asked some other people for their opinion. They confessed they'd always thought it looked like "Pedo", but never said anything. My name is Peele. I've been signing it off as Pedo for 10 years. FML

#21381199
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26753) - you deserved it (3211)

On 03/25/2015 at 9:10am - misc - by peele - Estonia (Harjumaa)

Today, I went to get a physical, forgetting I'd shaved my pubes the day before and still had bad razor burn. My doctor told me I had "dicken pox" and was prescribing me with shaving cream. FML

Today, I had to fall asleep to my next-door neighbors having sex because our walls are paper thin. What bothered me the most wasn't listening to them doing it, but knowing that she was faking it. FML

#21354562
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33933) - you deserved it (3256)

On 02/12/2015 at 2:39am - intimacy - by Mkimmi (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)



FML's blog

  • Feeling shitty? Write to Auntie Bernie!
  • It's a new summer, so here's a new feature. OK, that doesn't mean much, but you've got to start somewhere. The idea came from the fact that we get sent a lot of FMLs that touch us, in our heart of…

Friday 24 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: