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Chrisuh

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Chrisuh

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 15 March 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 11397
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Chrisuh : smile

Chrisuh's page activity

Visits<b>MM100</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 2:28pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 7:21pm<b>Jayroc</b> - the 01/19/2016 at 8:44pm<b>ccameron12</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 6:28pm<b>JMCJester69</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 7:42am<b>ratman775</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 12:04pm<b>Monday_funday</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 5:01pm<b>Zach_attack_</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 6:48am<b>broncosfan1996</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 1:24am<b>swarm20</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 1:03am<b>ekimen</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 7:54am<b>Philiphead</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 8:38am<b>Darkness_Hate</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 3:27pm<b>ZY1431</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 8:56am<b>skychu</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 1:06am<b>Andicc</b> - the 02/20/2014 at 4:22pm<b>VampOfSavannah</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 6:56pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 11/16/2013 at 11:41am

Fucked!<b>tin_cup</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 1:20am

Chrisuh's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of Chrisuh's badges

Chrisuh's favorite FMLs

Today, I came inside a girl's vagina by accident. Neither one of us wants her to be pregnant, and I had to spend half an hour with her sitting on my face, while I sucked my own cum out of her. I don't even know if this will work. FML

#21524955
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8063) - you deserved it (42779)

On 02/10/2016 at 9:12pm - intimacy - by nickncik (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I staged an intervention for my dad, because his midlife crisis has spun out of control. When I told him he's now basically endangering his own life, he replied "Everyone's gonna die someday. Some sooner than others, eh porky?" FML

#21500277
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20462) - you deserved it (2096)

On 12/05/2015 at 1:49am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I asked my dad why the Wi-fi was down. He just replied, "Why? Horno can't get no more porno?" No, "Horno" has an assignment. WTF? FML

#21499340
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21407) - you deserved it (2128)

On 12/02/2015 at 3:18pm - intimacy - by horno (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had to grab a large kitchen knife from my son, after I heard him convince his friend to join him in cutting off his finger, so they could "be assassins like Ezio." FML

#21479950
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24989) - you deserved it (2861)

On 10/14/2015 at 10:29am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I learned that your crotch can just light up on the body scanner in the airport for no apparent reason; and when that happens, a thorough pat down of that area will be performed by a confused security officer. FML

#21477704
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23288) - you deserved it (1523)

On 10/08/2015 at 10:06pm - misc - by Traveler (man) -

Today, I got in trouble for missing my shift. According to my idiot boss, "Crashes don't just happen." FML

#21442988
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27219) - you deserved it (1852)

On 07/17/2015 at 10:59am - work - by yeah - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went downstairs early in the morning to watch a movie. As I walked into the living room and reached for the light switch, I heard my dad say "Knew you'd change your mind. Get them panties off." followed by the sound of a zipper being undone. I've never been so mortified in my life. FML

#21442030
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34564) - you deserved it (2528)

On 07/15/2015 at 12:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I finally finished downloading a 60GB TV series after two weeks of waiting. Every single "episode" turned out to be Rick Astley singing Never Gonna Give You Up, on constant repeat. I almost respect the prankster's effort enough to not want to gut him like a fish. Almost. FML

#21439737
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28856) - you deserved it (7923)

On 07/10/2015 at 8:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, while lifeguarding over children at work, I started thinking about my girlfriend and got a hard on. Before I realized it, I saved a kid and then hopped out of the pool next to a 5 year old in front of my managers and a little over 50 patrons with a raging boner. My HR meeting is tomorrow. FML

#21437372
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29279) - you deserved it (7662)

On 07/06/2015 at 1:28pm - intimacy - by notacreep - United States (California)

Today, I found out where my sister's pet lizard escaped to. I also found out that the little shit likes to hide in dark, cold places. I discovered this when I heard the bastard squeal as I started the lawnmower. FML

#21435132
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24967) - you deserved it (2270)

On 07/01/2015 at 11:10pm - animals - by Alex Andreas - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, another idiot was admitted to my hospital with a foreign object up his ass. Yet again, the excuse went along the lines of "I tripped and fell on it." Please, someone tell me how you can accidentally trip anus-first onto the end of a cucumber, which just so happens to have a condom on it. FML

#21432533
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32854) - you deserved it (2371)

On 06/26/2015 at 9:21pm - work - by Idiot says "HIPAA violation" (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I realized that my new haircut makes me look like a movie star. Not Scarlett Johansson, no. I look like Lord Farquaad. FML

Today, I kept hearing a child creepily giggling in my living room. I couldn't sleep and got so scared that I started considering hiring an exorcist. Long story short: be careful if you have Bluetooth speakers, because your dickhead neighbor might hack them and start fucking with you. FML

#21401745
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35702) - you deserved it (4946)

On 04/29/2015 at 1:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found my son's porn. I would sit him down for a talk, but the genres were so disturbing that I'm afraid to even ask about it. FML

#21399141
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32381) - you deserved it (4008)

On 04/24/2015 at 6:04pm - kids - by anonymousyo - United States (California)

Today, I learned that, when you ask your girlfriend "Do you think we're having sex too often?" she might interpret it as, "I don't think we should have sex ever again," and entirely stop talking to you. FML

#21398912
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27231) - you deserved it (12860)

On 04/24/2015 at 7:38am - intimacy - by Sexless from Texas - United States (Texas)



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