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About Chrisuh : smile
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Tweet, tweet
You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we can understand why.
I NEED to know!
You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.
Today, I was browsing the web on my boyfriend's laptop, when I idly clicked a bookmark. It turned out to be his private blog, where he most recently spoke in very creepy detail about his efforts to make me love him, remarking that, "Soon, I'll plant my seed in her breeding hips." FML
I agree, your life sucks (7111) - you deserved it (774)
On 05/22/2012 at 4:49pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I had to excuse myself from the classroom so I could have a quick wank. This was because I somehow got extremely horny during a lesson on frog reproduction. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2009) - you deserved it (6578)
On 05/09/2012 at 6:19pm - intimacy - by polimeros (man) - Mexico (Queretaro de Arteaga)
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17299) - you deserved it (1485)
On 05/08/2012 at 10:05pm - intimacy - by laury - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my girlfriend said I could only take her virginity while I have a flaccid penis, so I won't hurt her. I get hard from just staring at her covered ass. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26764) - you deserved it (3743)
On 02/21/2012 at 2:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14737) - you deserved it (26101)
Today, my daughter brought her new boyfriend over for dinner. I realize now why she said we would get along great: we graduated high school together. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34646) - you deserved it (2155)
On 01/02/2012 at 8:10pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, my mother got incredibly drunk. She told me that only "sluts and whores" shave their pubes. She then told me that she's never once trimmed or shaved her pubes, because she's "moral." Thanks for that mental image, mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20778) - you deserved it (1577)
On 12/29/2011 at 3:16am - intimacy - by Grossed Out (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I realized that I've been intentionally causing arguments with my husband because the spare bed is more comfortable. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2484) - you deserved it (8075)
On 12/22/2011 at 12:31am - intimacy - by sninapeters - United States
Today, I used a public restroom with very shiny floors. So shiny, in fact, that I could see a clear reflection of the person in the next stall. I'm pretty sure they could see me too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20653) - you deserved it (1826)
On 10/01/2011 at 10:18am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, after a week of staying in at night and fighting off a persistent cold, I was finally feeling well again, so I decided to go to my boyfriend's work BBQ. I got food poisoning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8941) - you deserved it (726)
On 10/01/2011 at 1:17am - misc - by Sickofbeingsick (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, while on the bus, I found out the seat I'd taken was the preferred spot of a very hostile and extremely overweight freshman. Instead of letting me find different place to sit, she half sat on me, and completely ignored my attempts to dislodge myself all the way to school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18046) - you deserved it (1587)
On 09/30/2011 at 2:15pm - misc - by hihaay - United States
Today, the shy girl in my class decided to bring a cake to share with everyone, since it was her birthday. Excited about the cake, I got everybody to sing "happy birthday" for her, only to realize too late that nobody in the class know her name, myself included. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8412) - you deserved it (26218)
On 09/22/2011 at 12:44am - misc - by mortenp - United States (Maryland)
Today, I had a violent allergic reaction to some bread I ate at a restaurant. How did they apologize? By sending me a free basket of bread. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21444) - you deserved it (1862)
On 09/19/2011 at 8:21pm - health - by Eli (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21870) - you deserved it (6138)
On 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm - kids - by awesomekidsmum - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my daughter-in-law revealed to me that she caught my husband having an affair with her best friend. This was five years ago, and she is only telling me now because he stopped paying her the blackmail money to keep her mouth shut. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12369) - you deserved it (689)
On 09/17/2011 at 12:43am - love - by cheated (woman) - United States (California)
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