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Chloe_xoxo

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Chloe_xoxo
  • Town/Country : Cape Town, South Africa
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 8 December 1993 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 487
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About Chloe_xoxo : Im really chilled, mellow vibez :)

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Chloe_xoxo's favorite FMLs

Today, I have to defend my client in court. The defense that my client wants me to use is, "It's not a robbery if you have swag" and then goes on saying, "The judge is bound to let me go after he sees my swag." FML

#20680679
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52036) - you deserved it (4044)

On 05/22/2013 at 9:57pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend came home, chugged a beer, and passed out in our bed without saying hello or goodnight to me. I've been on vacation for a week and was hoping to cuddle. But no, if I try to touch him, he hits me and growls. FML

#18382855
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23634) - you deserved it (4721)

On 11/29/2011 at 3:00am - love - by LadyDean - United States (North Dakota)

Today, I saw Santa. He gave me the finger. FML

#18378519
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20560) - you deserved it (4579)

On 11/28/2011 at 7:44pm - misc - by moopymoplady - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had a big presentation to do at work, so I got up early and ran myself a bath. I woke up three hours later, extremely late, and still in the bath. FML

#18377899
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15169) - you deserved it (19537)

On 11/28/2011 at 6:43pm - work - by fuuuuck (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my engagement ring was seized by the police, and my fiancé was arrested on larceny charges. Both in the same visit. FML

#18309913
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20475) - you deserved it (1914)

On 11/21/2011 at 6:26pm - love - by madison77 - United States

Today, while watching a man in front of me on the bus remove his cap to scratch his noggin, I noticed the swarm of dandruff that was about to nail me in my face. FML

#18306908
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21435) - you deserved it (1959)

On 11/21/2011 at 11:23am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was so hungry that I literally stole candy from a baby. FML

#18306408
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9152) - you deserved it (39391)

On 11/21/2011 at 9:34am - health - by bad karma (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I'm on holiday with my boyfriend. Going through Chinese customs, an officer pulled us aside, removed a suspicious metal object from my boyfriend's luggage and called six other officers to have a look. It was a kinky pair of handcuffs. FML

#18235563
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21614) - you deserved it (5396)

On 11/13/2011 at 7:46am - love - by notthatkinkyanyway - China (Beijing)

Today, my daughter asked me how to spell "Orange". "O-R-A-N-G-E" I replied. Without missing a beat, she says "No, I mean the colour, not the fruit." She is 16. FML

#18234448
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35192) - you deserved it (5503)

On 11/13/2011 at 1:53am - kids - by weswithaute - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I sent the texts "I love and miss you babe;)." and "Shit wrong person." to my ex just so he would think I have a life. FML

#18234157
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16289) - you deserved it (53577)

On 11/13/2011 at 1:16am - love - by random person - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was watching wrestling videos on YouTube, when my little brother walked in. Later, my little brother told my parents that I was watching naked men on my computer. They won't stop thinking that I was watching gay porn. FML

#18226728
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26930) - you deserved it (6448)

On 11/12/2011 at 9:19am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my young son wanted to rent some movie with talking animals in it for us to watch together. I couldn't say no, but talking animal movies freak me out big time, I either start to cry or feel nauseous. Especially ones with dogs. What is wrong with me? FML

#18217794
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23292) - you deserved it (7172)

On 11/11/2011 at 10:37am - animals - by Pk45 (man) - United Kingdom (Swansea)

Today, I dined and dashed. Upon reaching my car, I realized I had left my seven year-old daughter in the restaurant. FML

#18217676
372 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7032) - you deserved it (98283)

On 11/11/2011 at 10:17am - kids - by embarrassed - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend of five years was in a bad car crash, and ended up with a concussion. He didn't remember me. At all. But he remembered his other girlfriend he had cheated on me with for two months. FML

#18210187
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45792) - you deserved it (3343)

On 11/10/2011 at 1:22pm - love - by Nicoli - United States (Washington)

Today, my mother spent over $5,000 to fly in a Feng-Shui master, put him in a five-star hotel, and had him walk around our house with a compass, moving things to help improve the "energy flow." Now all I have in my room is an old mattress and lamp. He's coming back tomorrow. FML

#18209020
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28049) - you deserved it (2580)

On 11/10/2011 at 9:35am - money - by Agathus (man) - United Arab Emirates



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