About Chingy892987 : I'm an artist and can be pretty shy.
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, I went on a date with a guy who seemed to be quite the gentleman. I was proven wrong when he told me to "shut it" during dinner, stiffed me on the bill, and then left me at the restaurant so he could get his own taxi home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23620) - you deserved it (4189)
On 02/24/2011 at 3:03pm - misc - by OhDear (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)
Today, I was dumped. I ran home and cried and ranted on and on to my mother. After about 10 minutes of talking, she threw a book at my face and said, "No wonder he dumped you! You can't shut up!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (20846) - you deserved it (10899)
On 01/26/2011 at 8:26am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was talking to my girlfriend on the phone. The subject of abuse came up and I told her that if her father ever hurt her I would cut his dick off. The next thing I hear is, "Don't say shit you can't back up!" Her father had picked up the phone the moment I'd said it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19341) - you deserved it (9240)
On 01/24/2011 at 5:47pm - intimacy - by Fucked (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, my girlfriend, who's on a diet, refused to give me a blow job because my sperm would "add useless calories" to her day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29805) - you deserved it (10177)
On 01/22/2011 at 7:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I went on my first date in months. My mum had invited friends over, and when I told them I was going out on a date, my mum said "No you're not, don't lie. Who would go out with you?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (25045) - you deserved it (2019)
On 12/29/2010 at 8:01am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my doctor told me to buy some KY Jelly and a dildo to help "loosen me up" so sex isn't so painful. I haven't been able to have sex for 6 months because it hurts so badly, and now my doctor has basically told me to go fuck myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26660) - you deserved it (6852)
On 11/22/2010 at 2:36pm - intimacy - by painfulintercourse - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I asked my boyfriend in a sexy way "What should we do now, honey?" He answered, "Suck my dick?" I said "I was thinking of something more... romantic." He replied "Suck my dick in the moonlight?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (28855) - you deserved it (16266)
On 10/13/2010 at 9:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Spain (Asturias)
Today, I was watching tv with my grandpa, and he stops flipping channels on a movie with a hot naked chick getting oiled down. Suddenly the remote lands on my stomach as my mom and grandma walk in the door. They yelled at me for being a pervert for an hour, while my grandpa sat and chuckled. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29601) - you deserved it (3188)
On 09/24/2010 at 6:22am - misc - by Andrew - United States (Indiana)
Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35558) - you deserved it (9659)
On 08/22/2010 at 2:58am - kids - by Bailey - United States (Nebraska)
Today, I was babysitting for my mum's friend. I put her little boy on my knee, and he kept pulling at my top. I asked him "are you hungry?" He replied "No, I want to see your titties." FML
I agree, your life sucks (31600) - you deserved it (7953)
On 08/04/2010 at 6:25am - intimacy - by Embarressed... (woman) - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)
Today, after a large, dramatic fight with my girlfriend in a parking lot, we stopped arguing altogether and hugged, dropping the issue. Twenty seconds later, I accidentally slammed her hand in the car door, breaking two of her fingers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32254) - you deserved it (9154)
On 07/03/2010 at 3:26pm - love - by Z (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, my wife changed her facebook status from "married" to "widowed". I'm scared. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57382) - you deserved it (4262)
On 06/02/2010 at 2:17pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, my insanely jealous wife flipped out and made me promise never to hug any of my female friends or go to lunch with them, ever. It's "cheating." FML
I agree, your life sucks (37131) - you deserved it (16668)
On 03/30/2010 at 12:04pm - love - by ballnchain (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I got dumped because I was on my period. Apparently he was pissed because I have one "like, every single month." FML
I agree, your life sucks (57387) - you deserved it (6234)
On 03/28/2010 at 5:04am - intimacy - by drsyl54 - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I waked in on my boyfriend and his best friend playing "Dick Wars" while wearing glow in the dark condoms. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41534) - you deserved it (7654)
On 03/27/2010 at 4:26am - intimacy - by pumpkinlover89 - United States (California)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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