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CheyenneEMPK's FML badges
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CheyenneEMPK's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 06/22/2013 at 3:31am / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML
by Anonymous / 06/07/2013 at 3:10am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy
by Ihatemylife / 03/03/2013 at 7:17am / Slovenia (Bohinj) / Intimacy
Today, I had to buy groceries while suffering horrible morning sickness. My nausea magnified as I stood in line behind an obese lady wearing a tank top and tiny short shorts. I lost everything in my stomach when she stuck her hand down her shorts and started scratching at her ass-crack. FML
by Anonymous / 10/04/2012 at 2:10pm / United States (Nebraska) / Health
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- Today, I visited my parents with my four year old. My son started to excitedly tell his grandmother… Today, I had to drive my sister home. We drove the half hour south to get to my Dad's, only to get… Today, like we do every year, my family and I went on vacation. Also today, like she does in every…