Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Caymokomoko

Offline (the 12/01/2015 at 9:51pm) | Search for a member

Caymokomoko

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 8 November 1990 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5173
  • Number of comments : 19
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 19 posted

About Caymokomoko : I believe i can fly, i believe i can touuch the sky...

Caymokomoko's page activity

Visits<b>Gracemonique3</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 1:55am<b>zee8</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 11:28pm<b>uasb97</b> - the 10/19/2015 at 3:02am<b>LeavenSilva</b> - the 10/09/2015 at 11:47pm<b>hayleycasford</b> - the 10/08/2015 at 10:35pm<b>Scotth901</b> - the 10/08/2015 at 6:56pm<b>zobara</b> - the 10/08/2015 at 9:43am<b>demamcgirl16</b> - the 10/08/2015 at 6:33am<b>wildnargles</b> - the 10/08/2015 at 2:53am<b>kaylarose114</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 7:44pm<b>TheBadAndGnarly</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 3:59pm<b>droid1126</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 1:50pm<b>NozomiTojo</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 10:50am<b>SkipBeatOtaku</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 12:11pm<b>sunshinepoptart</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 8:00pm<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 4:49pm<b>Anumayis</b> - the 04/23/2013 at 9:04pm

Caymokomoko's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of Caymokomoko's badges

Caymokomoko's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

#20882561
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59770) - you deserved it (29693)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I had sex with a guy wearing a KFC uniform. Hat included. FML

#20877518
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24936) - you deserved it (72096)

On 09/11/2013 at 8:16pm - intimacy - by lyfisdyno - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, after having recently told my 4-year-old daughter that she won't grow big and tall if she doesn't eat her veggies, she decided to pass this wisdom on to a midget that we passed in the store. FML

#20877041
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60317) - you deserved it (9754)

On 09/11/2013 at 2:10pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, at work, I had to utter the phrase, "Sir, please stop rubbing yourself with the peas." It's exactly how it sounds. FML

#20847854
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46006) - you deserved it (3237)

On 08/21/2013 at 1:30pm - work - by twatstick (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, I found my elderly neighbour on all fours in my garden eating my flowers. FML

#20836671
115 comments

Today, I was watching a movie with my family in which a character said "Fuck you, dad." My dad then slapped me over the head to get my attention and said, "Never talk to your father like that." Okay, dad. FML

#20833982
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48344) - you deserved it (4310)

On 08/12/2013 at 4:04pm - misc - by idonteven - United States (California)

Today, my 14-year-old daughter convinced my son that when he was born, he was actually born as a girl, but we wanted a boy so bad we had his gender changed. Now he wants to change back to a girl because now he doesn't feel right as a boy. Last year, she got her other brother to cross dress. FML

#20832766
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52918) - you deserved it (5640)

On 08/11/2013 at 8:58pm - kids - by mydaughterisdisturbed - United States (Indiana)

Today, I got a call from my son's kindergarten teacher. Apparently my son asked a girl to marry him. After she said no, he stabbed her with a fork. FML

#20829995
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63731) - you deserved it (5876)

On 08/10/2013 at 12:02am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend grinning at me, her hand on my junk. I grinned back, then looked down and saw blood smeared all over her hand and my junk. After I started screaming and crying, she laughed and said it was fake blood. She recorded everything. FML

#20820496
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72771) - you deserved it (9579)

On 08/04/2013 at 3:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I've been getting calls for over a week on my home phone, cell phone, and the work phone at my night shift, in which someone whispers terrifying Satanic-sounding chants at me. I've now found out that the caller is my best "friend". His explanation: "You seemed lonely, man." FML

#20820394
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46070) - you deserved it (4521)

On 08/04/2013 at 2:07pm - misc - by newbffswelcome (man) - Vietnam (Ha Noi)

Today, after giving me my very first orgasm, my boyfriend sat me down and had a serious chat with me about my orgasm face. Apparently it reminded him of the scene in the Exorcist with the possessed girl, and it really freaked him out. FML

#20816805
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63732) - you deserved it (8031)

On 08/02/2013 at 10:08am - intimacy - by right (woman) - United Kingdom (Dorset)

Today, because I refused to shave off what my wife calls my "pedo 'stache", she painted "Free Candy" on the side of my van. FML

#20807393
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43234) - you deserved it (28975)

On 07/28/2013 at 12:59am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my friends took my work laptop and changed the sounds. Now, whenever I remove a USB device, a woman's voice screams "Put it back!" and when I insert a USB device, it says "Oh, you need to push it in harder!" I don't know how to change it back. FML

#20793994
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58657) - you deserved it (6763)

On 07/20/2013 at 11:45am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Delaware)

Today, while wiping my ass, the broken finger that has been set straight dipped into the toilet and touched a turd. This keeps happening since I broke it, and I'm sure it will again. FML

#20790784
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41868) - you deserved it (11538)

On 07/18/2013 at 4:53pm - health - by broken finger (man) - United States

Today, I was browsing porn in my room, when my dad barged in. I quickly switched to another tab, only to see it was parked on another porn page. I had another browser window open, so I switched to that. More porn. My dad said, "Riiiggghhhttt... You need help, son." FML

#20779957
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29516) - you deserved it (57701)

On 07/13/2013 at 1:22pm - misc - by fuck (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)



FML's blog

  • Eni's illustrated FML
  • Greetings worshipers of lines and colours! This week, with the help of a talented young illustrator we’re checking kids out. No, not like that. Damn, that sounded bad. We’re taking a different look a…

Friday 12 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: