About Caymokomoko : I believe i can fly, i believe i can touuch the sky...
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Caymokomoko's favorite FMLs
by Sleep_lover654 / 01/07/2016 at 1:46am / United States (Arizona) / Kids
Today, my coworker, who has a tendency to overshare, decided to tell me she has chlamydia. I threw my hands in the air and said, "Stop. I don't wanna know." A customer heard this exchange and we were both written up. FML
by fmltom / 12/15/2015 at 9:21pm / United States (Nevada) / Work
Today, I was given the following pearls of wisdom: "My grandmother always told me, if you've got nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all. Anyway, she was a cunt and so are you." Thanks, dad. Thanks. FML
by Anonymous / 12/11/2015 at 11:54pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/17/2015 at 9:13pm / United States (Virginia) / Kids
Today, I got out of bed, soaked up the beautiful sunlight, and went to the kitchen to make some coffee. I saw my dad rummaging through the fridge, shirtless and one ball poking through his underwear. I needed to see that about as much as I need ass cancer. FML
by eyegouger15 / 11/13/2015 at 11:32am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, while on the job as a cop, I was breaking up a loud house party. We were just doing one final check of the house, we walked into the bathroom to find a kid furiously wanking in the bath. This isn't the first time I've seen something like this. FML
by iwantaraise / 10/13/2015 at 9:55pm / Australia / Intimacy
by Nick Pat / 09/30/2015 at 9:13am / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/24/2015 at 1:07pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy
Today, I'm on vacation in Japan with my brother. When he said he could speak Japanese, I guess what he really meant that he's a dumbass weeaboo who only knows the words "kawaii", "baka", "sugoi" and a few others. He ended up offending two locals so much that they beat the shit out of us. FML
by Anonymous / 09/16/2015 at 1:16pm / Japan / Health
Today, I was undressing for my girlfriend. I thought I was being all smooth and sexy, until I went to sit on the side of the bed and beckon her over. Instead, I sat heavily on my balls, screamed, then fell off the bed sobbing like a girl. FML
by Anonymous / 08/25/2015 at 3:32am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by doodoobref / 07/31/2015 at 1:38am / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 07/30/2015 at 3:29pm / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Intimacy
by wtf did he do / 07/19/2015 at 5:02am / United States (Alaska) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was Skyping with my girlfriend. I was so incredibly tired and just wanted to go to bed, but she just kept talking and wouldn't let me go. I ended up blurting "Your mom's a cunt." just to start a fight and have an excuse to hang up on her. I feel like an asshole. FML
by Anonymous / 07/17/2015 at 8:54pm / United States (Tennessee) / Love