Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Caymokomoko

Offline (the 12/01/2015 at 9:51pm) | Search for a member

Caymokomoko

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 8 November 1990 (25 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5179
  • Number of comments : 19
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 19 posted

About Caymokomoko : I believe i can fly, i believe i can touuch the sky...

Caymokomoko's page activity

Visits<b>Gracemonique3</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 1:55am<b>zee8</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 11:28pm<b>uasb97</b> - the 10/19/2015 at 3:02am<b>LeavenSilva</b> - the 10/09/2015 at 11:47pm<b>hayleycasford</b> - the 10/08/2015 at 10:35pm<b>Scotth901</b> - the 10/08/2015 at 6:56pm<b>zobara</b> - the 10/08/2015 at 9:43am<b>demamcgirl16</b> - the 10/08/2015 at 6:33am<b>wildnargles</b> - the 10/08/2015 at 2:53am<b>kaylarose114</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 7:44pm<b>TheBadAndGnarly</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 3:59pm<b>droid1126</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 1:50pm<b>NozomiTojo</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 10:50am<b>SkipBeatOtaku</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 12:11pm<b>sunshinepoptart</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 8:00pm<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 4:49pm<b>Anumayis</b> - the 04/23/2013 at 9:04pm

Caymokomoko's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of Caymokomoko's badges

Caymokomoko's favorite FMLs

Today, while at my shitty, minimum wage job at McDonalds, a guy walked out of the bathroom. He said "Good luck in there." worriedly, then left. I don't know if it was his handiwork, but it looked like a shit grenade had detonated. It was even on the walls. FML

#21439774
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27821) - you deserved it (2062)

On 07/10/2015 at 10:20pm - work - by don't get paid enough for this (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my docile gerbil was startled by a car alarm. He dove into my tank top and bit straight through my nipple. FML

#21434340
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25444) - you deserved it (2599)

On 06/30/2015 at 12:02pm - animals - by piercednipple (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my cleavage got me out of a speeding ticket. That is, until the officer looked up long enough to realize I'm a guy. FML

#21433135
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25394) - you deserved it (4386)

On 06/28/2015 at 3:17am - misc - by fat and broke - United States (Washington)

Today, I went to my girlfriend's parents' house for lunch. I ended up in the bathroom constipated and remembered reading it's easier to "go" if you are squatting. My girlfriend's dad walked in on me perched on the toilet like an owl. FML

#21430214
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25859) - you deserved it (4908)

On 06/22/2015 at 4:58pm - health - by oh no (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was on a boat and I thought I saw a towel fly off, but it was actually my fricken dog. FML

#21426414
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32822) - you deserved it (5148)

On 06/15/2015 at 10:49am - animals - by justin Bieber - United States (Michigan)

Today, I walked in on my roommate with her ass cheeks spread wide, and her friend ripping a strip of wax off of her while wearing a headlamp flashlight to see if she "got it all". FML

#21420563
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33835) - you deserved it (4074)

On 06/04/2015 at 3:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, at my daughter's wedding celebration, I was doing a Michael Jackson act with a few buddies. It went well until I did the crotch-grab. I yanked my balls too hard and fell to the floor, writhing in agony in front of nearly 70 guests. FML

#21417667
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16339) - you deserved it (24934)

On 05/29/2015 at 4:15pm - health - by not a kiddy fiddler really (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had to pick my brother up from work because he broke down crying. I arrived to find that apparently, you can get so stoned that serving a pregnant woman at a fast food joint moves you to tears over the miracle of life. FML

#21409953
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31795) - you deserved it (2493)

On 05/14/2015 at 10:23am - misc - by sistertaxi - Australia

Today, my grandpa told me he was going to be eating out tonight, and I asked at which restaurant. He replied "Your gran's room." and winked. I didn't need that mental image, at all. FML

#21409445
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32179) - you deserved it (3010)

On 05/13/2015 at 12:00pm - misc - by -_- (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my 6-year-old daughter barged into the bathroom while I was peeing, inspected the toilet and said, "You're well hydrated, good job." FML

#21405462
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30625) - you deserved it (3829)

On 05/06/2015 at 1:22am - kids - by seethroughpee - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found my son's porn. I would sit him down for a talk, but the genres were so disturbing that I'm afraid to even ask about it. FML

#21399141
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32381) - you deserved it (4008)

On 04/24/2015 at 6:04pm - kids - by anonymousyo - United States (California)

Today, my best friend can now say "I fucked your mom" to me and actually mean it. FML

#21397883
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46169) - you deserved it (3444)

On 04/22/2015 at 10:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I told my younger brother that I'm a lesbian. Now he keeps asking me if I want to play rock, paper, vagina. FML

#21390758
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30398) - you deserved it (5232)

On 04/09/2015 at 4:24pm - love - by Sarah (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my 3-year-old son said to me, "Fuck a duck, Daddy." I have no idea where he heard this. FML

#21382327
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30691) - you deserved it (3446)

On 03/27/2015 at 9:29am - kids - by njh - Ireland

Today, I've managed to go my whole nine-year teaching career without anyone vomiting in my classroom. That record was broken today when someone vomited four successive times in front of a class of 46 students. It was me. FML

#21373013
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32800) - you deserved it (2785)

On 03/12/2015 at 6:23am - work - by musicteacher - United States (North Carolina)



FML's blog

  • Eni's illustrated FML
  • Greetings worshipers of lines and colours! This week, with the help of a talented young illustrator we’re checking kids out. No, not like that. Damn, that sounded bad. We’re taking a different look a…

Friday 12 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: