Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

CattyMcEwwen

Offline (the 05/15/2014 at 5:56pm) | Search for a member

CattyMcEwwen

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 26 June 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 191
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About CattyMcEwwen : I'm very bubbly and always up for a chat if you want to message me :) I'm openly bisexual and my favourite band is Papa Roach :)

CattyMcEwwen's page activity

Visits<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 12:47am<b>Sebastian2022</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 3:18pm<b>Chelsea_bella</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 11:10pm<b>maxface</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 8:36pm<b>inner_peace</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 7:56pm<b>giantbuts71</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 10:52pm<b>Leo619</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 1:52pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 10:23pm<b>1tsmenoah</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 5:30pm<b>soccerforlife_27</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 1:05am<b>stevenJB</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 9:19pm<b>s1s1</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 10:26am<b>Adam5858</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 8:18am

CattyMcEwwen's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of CattyMcEwwen's badges

CattyMcEwwen's favorite FMLs

Today, I got really bored so I posted on Facebook "Someone should kidnap me for the day." My mom commented, "The only things willing to kidnap you are aliens, and that would be because they'd mistaken you for a cow." 16 people liked her comment. FML

#18860865
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35767) - you deserved it (10140)

On 01/20/2012 at 10:15am - misc - by LonerCow (woman) - United States

Today, on a dating site, I was matched with my brother, again. FML

#18128656
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47154) - you deserved it (5389)

On 11/01/2011 at 12:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)

Today, my boyfriend cheated on me. But he justified it by saying she was a ginger. FML

#17738914
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30961) - you deserved it (3967)

On 09/13/2011 at 8:07pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I walked in on my mom ranting on about what a useless bitch I am. She was talking to my cat. It's not the first time this has happened, either. FML

#17471195
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30006) - you deserved it (3526)

On 08/14/2011 at 3:32pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I walked in on my mom ranting on about what a useless bitch I am. She was talking to my cat. It's not the first time this has happened, either. FML

#17471195
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30006) - you deserved it (3526)

On 08/14/2011 at 3:32pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tearing each other's clothes off. I had to keep my breath in time with my mom's panting and moaning as my dad brutally dominated her. FML

#17109043
425 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30540) - you deserved it (89027)

On 07/14/2011 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by gir - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was shopping for clothes. I thought this guy was a mannequin because he was standing perfectly still. I poked him and he screamed like a girl. FML

#16464729
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13491) - you deserved it (31839)

On 06/02/2011 at 6:05am - misc - by ohcrap - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, against my wishes, my family and I went swimming with sharks. While in the shark cage, a shark got within a few feet of us. My cowardly bowels objected and caused me to shit myself. FML

#16403007
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36933) - you deserved it (10393)

On 05/29/2011 at 2:22pm - animals - by Brie - United States

Today, my manager told me to throw out some of the old toys at the daycare we work at. I can't because I've seen Toy Story 3, and thinking about them in a dump makes me cry. I'm 28. FML

#15852392
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32862) - you deserved it (16518)

On 04/19/2011 at 10:29pm - work - by Stupid (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that if I were 2 inches shorter, I would have to sit in a booster seat in the car. I'm about to turn 22. FML

#15740494
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35076) - you deserved it (4352)

On 04/11/2011 at 1:36pm - misc - by shorty (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I joked with my dad, saying I'd gotten my boyfriend pregnant. In response, he slapped me, threw my phone across the room, smashed my laptop, and then took a moment for what I'd said to sink in. FML

#15514877
353 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41953) - you deserved it (28637)

On 03/27/2011 at 2:09pm - misc - by rowie1311 (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, my father who left my family over 10 years ago and never contacted us or paid child support, poked me on Facebook. FML

#15209199
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57362) - you deserved it (3675)

On 03/05/2011 at 7:24pm - misc - by poked - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I cycled 30 minutes through hail and rain to get my pregnant girlfriend the crisps she was craving. When I made it back, she didn't want them anymore. FML

#15139053
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37293) - you deserved it (7228)

On 02/27/2011 at 12:41pm - love - by Anonymous - Ireland

Today, my cat tried to kill me. While I was sleeping, he put his paws on either side of my face and laid down, covering my nose and mouth. While I was struggling to free myself, I could hear my sister laughing next to me. FML

#15051806
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26596) - you deserved it (4351)

On 02/20/2011 at 12:45pm - animals - by Michelle - United States (California)

Today, the sweetest thing my boyfriend ever told me was that I'd make a good porn star. FML

#15036235
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28528) - you deserved it (8024)

On 02/19/2011 at 2:20am - love - by PlayboyBunny (woman) - United States (Texas)



FML's blog

  • Matteor's illustrated FML #2
  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: