Cath1_1

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Cath1_1

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2814
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

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Cath1_1's FML badges

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

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Cath1_1's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by tossing the ring at me and saying "Here, wear this." FML

by Username / 07/20/2011 at 7:07pm / United States / Love

Today, already knowing that my girlfriend wanted to be "just friends", I invited her over, hoping to change her mind. She was playfully drawing on me with a pen when I noticed she'd written "Emily's property" on my leg. I said "Aw, I'm yours?" She then drew a for-sale sign on me. FML

by John / 07/20/2011 at 12:38pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, a group of girl-scouts came to my door selling chocolate bars. I bought 2 bars and smiled as they left, thinking I'd done a good deed. When the door closed, I heard one of the girls say, "Told you, the fat bitches always wanna buy from us." FML

by hatemylife / 07/19/2011 at 2:24am / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, in front of family and friends, as I got down on one knee, my girlfriend fainted. Her father, a lawyer, rushed over and said, "Anything she says for the next 72 hours is not legally binding" and whisked her away. FML

by bigjohn106 / 07/17/2011 at 8:34am / United States (Maryland) / Love

Today, I surprised my four year old daughter with a stuffed dinosaur. She named it 'Horny.' FML

by douglas / 07/17/2011 at 3:14am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, my six year old son came up to me with his arms spread and said, "I feel like a hug." I got really excited and hopeful because he is very anti-social and hates physical contact. As soon as I stood up to hug him he said "Feeling's gone" and walked away. FML

by Rejected / 07/16/2011 at 9:28am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids

Today, my child was refusing to leave the playground. I had to pry her, screaming and crying, from the monkey bars. I then realized I had been assaulting someone else's kid. FML

by anon / 07/14/2011 at 9:51pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, while at my job at a Christian summer camp, I overheard one of the kids swearing. I politely said, "Please, only speak as Jesus would." He paused for a moment and replied, "Go to hell." FML

by sbutler / 07/14/2011 at 4:14pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tearing each other's clothes off. I had to keep my breath in time with my mom's panting and moaning as my dad brutally dominated her. FML

by gir / 07/14/2011 at 3:35pm / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend of 2 1/2 years still refuses to memorize my phone number or remember my birthday because he says there is a limited amount of space in his brain and he does not want to push any important information out. FML

by skidoosh / 07/13/2011 at 9:44pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Love

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me on my Facebook wall. 27 people liked it. FML

by 30Jenna / 07/13/2011 at 6:01pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I was invited over to a dinner with the CEOs of my company, along with my two children. My 3 year-old asked loudly why we have two "nose holes", to which my 4 year-old son replied "So you can pick your nose and still breathe!" He then demonstrated. FML

by ohno / 07/13/2011 at 12:43am / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, I was robbed by a guy wearing a ninja turtle costume. FML

by Lame / 07/09/2011 at 8:19pm / United States (New York) / Money

Today, I peeked through my window and trained a pair of binoculars on my neighbour's house. Every night without fail, he ends up standing in front of his window topless to flex his muscles. This time, I was surprised to instead find a note taped to the window saying, "Sorry, I'm out tonight." FML

by Anonyme / 07/08/2011 at 8:11pm / Love

Today, my mom took me to a counselor because of my addiction to watermelon. FML

by Anonymous / 07/05/2011 at 6:28pm / United States (Missouri) / Health