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Cassro92's favorite FMLs
Today, I was working at my new job at a food court on campus. One of the supervisors came up to my station and told me that I "really look like someone who, through some miracle, accidentally found their way into college." He then threw a pickle at me. FML
by SakuraBreeze / 09/26/2011 at 1:18am / United States (Indiana) / Work
Today, I went out with a guy I really liked for the first time. He tried to hold my hands, only to be stopped by my mum, jumping out from nowhere saying "Oh no you don't!" before slapping him. This isn't the first time this has happened. FML
by Anonymous / 09/25/2011 at 6:26am / Singapore / Love
by ouch. / 09/25/2011 at 12:17am / United States (New York) / Work
by Anonymous / 09/24/2011 at 7:32pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/24/2011 at 7:01pm / United States (Kentucky) / Love
Today, I had a science test. A question asked, "What is the first stage of photosynthesis?" I didn't know, so just trying to be light-hearted, I wrote, "The plant must first believe in itself." My teacher didn't think it was funny, and gave me detention for insulting her intelligence. FML
by Anonymous / 09/22/2011 at 12:17pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was expecting my period. To avoid the embarrassment of everyone in the office finding out, instead of putting tampons in my bag, I hid one in my bra. It fell out while I was coming back from lunch. I am now known to all as "The Tampon Dispenser". FML
by Anonymous / 09/22/2011 at 9:55am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I caught my boyfriend of two years cheating on me. Instead of the usual excuses, he panicked and claimed he was my boyfriend's long-lost twin brother. He even tried to put on a fake accent. FML
by Anonymous / 09/19/2011 at 10:26am / United States (North Carolina) / Love
Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML
by awesomekidsmum / 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
by unknown / 09/14/2011 at 8:21pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids
by Penkkis / 09/13/2011 at 2:11am / Finland (Lapland) / Love
by Anonymous / 09/13/2011 at 2:05am / United States (Tennessee) / Animals
by thatoneguy / 09/05/2011 at 4:23pm / United States (Texas) / Kids
by kidswithnomanners / 09/05/2011 at 1:04pm / United States (New York) / Kids
by Anonymous / 09/01/2011 at 2:02pm / United States (Illinois) / Kids
- Today, the $300 ring my boyfriend gave me for my birthday slipped off my finger... into the toilet.… Today, my boyfriend thought he gave me unimaginable pleasure. I didn't have the heart to tell him I… Today, I was talking with this cute guy. I mentioned the fact that I'm single. His response, "It'd…