CassandraGF

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Offline (the 06/21/2016 at 11:27pm)

CassandraGF

3Fucked!

CassandraGFCassandraGF
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 25 February 1995 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1691
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About CassandraGF : From a small town , without a small town mind .

CassandraGF's page activity

Visits<b>LinGoodman</b> - the 06/21/2016 at 9:48am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 8:17pm<b>crazypants2015</b> - the 05/09/2016 at 2:29pm<b>PercyD1456</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 6:38am<b>frankmz</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 11:51pm<b>frostedfoster</b> - the 04/26/2016 at 6:46am<b>OmgimBored</b> - the 04/17/2016 at 3:54am<b>boosack</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 11:05am<b>kile25</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 6:43pm<b>lesnotbehonest</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 3:09pm<b>jordanwilbanks</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 11:15am<b>pred8885</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 5:21am<b>doubledutchy</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 4:04am<b>bigwell</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 9:45pm<b>minimanion</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 2:26am<b>thundercrow1999</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 11:42pm<b>Nickb55</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 9:38am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 8:48pm

Fucked!<b>lesnotbehonest</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 9:09pm<b>jordanwilbanks</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 5:15pm<b>minimanion</b> - the 10/19/2015 at 3:11am

CassandraGF's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of CassandraGF's badges

CassandraGF's favorite FMLs

Today, I dreamed I was wrestling an alligator. I quickly woke up to my girlfriend yelling and me holding her in a headlock. FML

by AgentOrion / 08/29/2014 at 12:16am / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was watching the movie Frozen with my 8 year old daughter. I had seen it before, so I sung along with some of the songs. My daughter put a finger over my lips, said "Shhhhhhhhut the fuck up," then turned back to the TV, giggling. FML

by JackieD / 08/25/2014 at 2:05pm / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, my new doctor gave me a breast exam and said everything was healthy, before adding "Well, I think so, anyway. I don't actually work here." As I freaked out, he laughed out loud, said he was just kidding, and that he should prescribe me a chill pill. FML

by humdrummitydrum / 08/19/2014 at 4:46pm / United States / Health

Today, I was hammered, and on my way home I walked into a policeman. My logic was: if I'm on the phone, he can't talk to me, so I pulled my phone out and started speaking. The officer then asked me why I was speaking to my wallet. FML

by drunk under 18 teenager / 08/19/2014 at 9:37am / Morocco (Marrakech-Tensift-Al Haouz) / Geek

Today, I went with my girlfriend to the gym for the first time. I knew I was in bad shape, but I bet her that I could lift more than her. Not only did I get my ass handed to me by a 5', 115lbs girl in front of the entire gym, I also have to attend Zumba in bright pink spandex. FML

by Dancing King / 08/07/2014 at 11:36am / Norway (Rogaland) / Health

Today, I went to my weekly AA meeting. It was a huge crowd and I was the guest speaker. Not 5 minutes into my speech, I was booed off stage and banned from further attendance because I accidentally wore a Jack Daniel's shirt. FML

by dypshyyt / 07/22/2014 at 7:20pm / United States (Florida) / Health

Today, I ran into a good friend at work. I work at a jail. She doesn't. FML

by Is that..? / 07/16/2014 at 11:51pm / United States (Colorado) / Work

Today, I went to a market. I saw stall which had mainly animal furs and things like that. I found a rounded, furry pen and stroked my cheek with it. Wondering what it was, being so soft and oddly shaped, I checked the tag. It was kangaroo testicles. FML

by happypineapple / 07/16/2014 at 11:31pm / Australia (Queensland) / Animals

Today, I found a wasp in my kitchen, so I opened the back door and left the room for 10 minutes in the hope that it would fly away. Upon returning, I found that there were now three wasps, a vicious cat and a very panicked pigeon crashing around the room. FML

by Snow-White / 07/03/2014 at 8:27pm / United Kingdom (Cheshire) / Animals

Today, my brain decided to go into suicide mode. So far I've managed to open a fridge door into my face, walk balls-first into the corner of a table, and sliced my finger while trying to cut open some thick plastic packaging with scissors. I'll probably be dead by the time this is posted. FML

by FMyBrain / 06/06/2014 at 5:26pm / United States (Alaska) / Health

Today, I nervously flirted with a very cute guy. Being a little overweight, I rarely think cute guys will go for me. This line of thinking was yet again correct when he casually pulled his sleeve up revealing a tattoo of a pinup girl with a "NO FAT CHICKS" sign below it. FML

by nofatchicks / 05/12/2014 at 7:49pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, my daughter was scared to go to the bathroom because she thought there was a person behind the shower curtain. There actually was a person behind the shower curtain. FML

by kids / 05/12/2014 at 1:17am / Kids

Today, while at work as a telemarketer, I called a customer on his home phone. Once I was connected, an automated voice said, "To speak with a customer, please press 1." Confused, I pressed one. I then heard loud laughter followed by, "Oh my god! What a dumbass!" before they hung up. FML

by Anonymous / 05/07/2014 at 11:57pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, I was at the bar. A man started to hit on me. He claims to have a fetish for pregnant women. I'm not pregnant. FML

by Anonymous / 05/04/2014 at 7:28pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taking the bus to work, when a man sat down beside me. The guy was nuttier than Ron Jeremy's ballsack, and had a face like a shovel and the worst meth mouth I've ever seen. I had to sit there for ages while he frantically muttered to himself and picked at my hair. FML

by fuckingfloridahowihatethee / 04/26/2014 at 3:55pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous