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CaptainCocoa

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CaptainCocoa

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  • Number of visits : 224
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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CaptainCocoa's page activity

Visits<b>ZombieGuyCXV</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 3:54pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 2:58pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 07/23/2013 at 8:41am<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 05/31/2013 at 9:22am<b>candy29</b> - the 05/29/2013 at 2:03am<b>Jimbo12000</b> - the 04/15/2013 at 3:42pm

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CaptainCocoa's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad walked in on me filming a Harlem Shake video. He stared for a moment, said "Son, I don't have a problem with homosexuals, but... nevermind." then shook his head and walked out. FML

#20806774
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37010) - you deserved it (23577)

On 07/27/2013 at 6:43pm - misc - by ¬_¬ (man) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, I was babysitting a kid for the first time. She asked if she could watch a movie, so I downloaded Cinderella for her. An hour later, this 10-year-old girl was lecturing me about unrealistic standards of beauty and abusive relationships, and how I suck for liking the movie. FML

#20806393
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44522) - you deserved it (7876)

On 07/27/2013 at 1:51pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Finland

Today, I was working the drive-through at McDonald's. I greeted a customer with a, "Hi, how are you doing today?" His response: "Better than you." FML

#20795022
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46875) - you deserved it (7777)

On 07/21/2013 at 12:15am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, one of my cats gave birth. My other cat responded by eating the new litter in a jealous rage, then got indigestion and vomited. I had to clean up regurgitated kittens. FML

Today, while leaving McDonald's, I threw a fry out the window to a flock of seagulls. I watched in the rear-view mirror as it landed in the opposite lane and about 60 winged rats descended upon the street, causing a truck to veer off the road and crash. FML

#20773275
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27123) - you deserved it (45456)

On 07/09/2013 at 10:48pm - misc - by John - United States

Today, I realized that getting wasted before finals is not a good idea. I sat down in the test hall, reached into my bag for a pencil, and found instead three baby carrots and a spoon. FML

#20757745
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18655) - you deserved it (58161)

On 07/01/2013 at 10:39am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, trying to be romantic, I invited my girlfriend over to watch a movie. I said she could pick one up on the way, and I'd pay for it later. I ended up having to suffer through some "movie" that involved nothing but Nicolas Cage gurning like a stroke victim between crappy fight scenes. FML

#18872855
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9708) - you deserved it (24918)

On 01/21/2012 at 5:44pm - love - by actor my ass (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to sit through 10 minutes of hearing a man on the tram tell his friend in explicit detail about all the filthy sex acts he'd like to do to me. His friend told him to take a photo to jack off to later. When I tried to tell the tram driver, he told me to "take it as a compliment." FML

#18851241
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35580) - you deserved it (3923)

On 01/19/2012 at 3:32am - intimacy - by missprude666 (woman) - Australia

Today, I caught three kids setting fire to a bush. After chasing them off, I parked my bike by a house and went to get water. After I'd put the fire out, I walked back to my bike just in time to see the kids running off with it. FML

#18182006
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27626) - you deserved it (4488)

On 11/07/2011 at 4:38am - misc - by Isoldael - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, I approached my daughter and told her she needs to clean her room. Her response was, "Thank you Captain Obvious." She's 4. FML

#17670632
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26930) - you deserved it (9267)

On 09/05/2011 at 1:04pm - kids - by kidswithnomanners (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was riding in the backseat while my mom was driving. Noticing she was driving way over the speed limit, I opened a police siren app on my iPod to make her slow down. When she realized, she pulled over, kicked me out of the car and made me walk home. FML

#13118537
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14347) - you deserved it (39201)

On 09/19/2010 at 8:07pm - misc - by whitefox123 - United States (Pennsylvania)



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