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Capt_Obvious

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Capt_Obvious

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3613
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Capt_Obvious : Gamer, Grammar NAZI, Sarcastic . . . That's about all you need to know.

Capt_Obvious's page activity

Visits<b>JayZuz</b> - yesterday at 11:37pm<b>cakefan123</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 7:08pm<b>wratty11</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 5:35am<b>bellladonna</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 4:52am<b>jbond97</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 9:08pm<b>reiindeer</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 11:54am<b>SkittlesGoRawr</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 11:33am<b>ilikeirony</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 10:39am<b>dzhonatan</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 9:56am<b>lochiamochia</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 9:33am<b>littlekellilee</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 9:15am<b>J352SAURUS</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 9:06am<b>miralars</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 11:47am<b>deusetnatura</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 7:43pm<b>Much2Much4U</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 12:27am<b>rylaii</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 10:35pm<b>gallifreyfrey</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 8:13pm<b>Cressent100</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 4:28pm

Capt_Obvious's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of Capt_Obvious's badges

Capt_Obvious's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the restroom to pee. A loud fart exploded out of my ass and echoed in the toilet bowl. I could practically feel my face on fire when I saw the horrified look on a little girl's face as I walked out. FML

#21166563
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43047) - you deserved it (6102)

On 06/07/2014 at 10:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I used a public toilet. After I did my business in the stall and walked out, I was confronted by the sight of a man standing on tip-toes, holding his penis up to the automatic hand-dryer. Doubt I'll get that image out of my head any time soon. FML

#21166318
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45622) - you deserved it (4665)

On 06/07/2014 at 5:37pm - intimacy - by yepintheladiesroom (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my brain decided to go into suicide mode. So far I've managed to open a fridge door into my face, walk balls-first into the corner of a table, and sliced my finger while trying to cut open some thick plastic packaging with scissors. I'll probably be dead by the time this is posted. FML

#21165186
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47035) - you deserved it (5437)

On 06/06/2014 at 5:26pm - health - by FMyBrain (man) - United States (Alaska)

Today, my students turned in their male figure artwork. One absolute idiot had the smart idea of drawing me and the TA as some kind of gay lovers. I was torn between disgust at the explicitness, anger at the disrespect, and yet awe at how well-drawn it was. FML

#21165062
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42142) - you deserved it (6152)

On 06/06/2014 at 3:00pm - work - by confusing (man) - Zimbabwe

Today, an older gentleman came into my work for underwear. I helped him find his size, pulled out a pair of navy ones and he then turned to me and said, "I don't want dark colours because I can't tell if I've shit myself." He then continued looking for all the white pairs. FML

#21163612
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41146) - you deserved it (4312)

On 06/05/2014 at 4:11am - work - by unashamed - Australia (Queensland)

Today, a customer told me, "Girls your size can't bend at the waist." I couldn't stop laughing at the imagery long enough to be really offended. FML

#21161933
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34320) - you deserved it (5043)

On 06/03/2014 at 6:02pm - work - by jennythezebra (woman) - United Kingdom (Croydon)

Today, I was talking to one of my British friends online, and he told me to say "yew anchors" a few times really fast. I'm a fairly stupid person, and wasn't very focused, so I did as he said. When I finally figured what the words meant, my dad had heard and grounded me for cursing. FML

#21161539
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30655) - you deserved it (9094)

On 06/03/2014 at 11:36am - kids - by properpissed (man) - United States (California)

Today, I took out my phone and realized I butt dialed my girlfriend and left her a 4 minute voicemail of me farting in an echoing toilet bowl. FML

#21158120
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44086) - you deserved it (8299)

On 05/31/2014 at 11:05am - love - by wendtinmypants (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my ex-girlfriend proposed to me, at my wedding. FML

#21158075
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53711) - you deserved it (7354)

On 05/31/2014 at 9:40am - love - by damn it rose (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I learned that my daughter was looking for love in all the wrong places, specifically the county jail. FML

Today, my husband thought it would be hilarious to slip a little fake blood into the bathtub while I was relaxing in it, eyes closed. When I opened my eyes, the water was one big cloud of red. I screamed so loud that I might as well have been dying, and yes, he recorded everything. FML

#21153463
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48230) - you deserved it (6366)

On 05/27/2014 at 2:47pm - misc - by N O - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at school, I got seated in front of the resident creepy kid that everyone stayed away from. I was pretty relieved to get through most of the class with no incidents, until the bell rang and he tore out a chunk of my hair, yelling "DNA! DNA!" FML

#21153319
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45149) - you deserved it (3744)

On 05/27/2014 at 11:58am - misc - by Laura (woman) - United States

Today, I told my girlfriend that I love her. She panicked and blurted out our S&M safeword. FML

#21152151
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46218) - you deserved it (6392)

On 05/26/2014 at 11:53am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I had to kick my own father out of my house after he started attacking my wife for breastfeeding our newborn son in the living room. All the way to the door, he ranted that "You don't see me whipping my dick out and pissing in front of everyone, do you?" FML

#21146270
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53962) - you deserved it (4791)

On 05/20/2014 at 1:27pm - misc - by Q - United States

Today, in the middle of my boyfriend finally giving me an orgasm, I had an anxiety attack, which caused him to have an attack of his own. I guess there is such a thing as having too much in common with your partner. FML

#21146226
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48233) - you deserved it (6381)

On 05/20/2014 at 12:31pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Singapore



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